Child support, what happens if my Ex files for welfare

[Patrick2013]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CO

I am curious as to what happens to me if my ex files for welfare? We have split custody, the divorce decree hasnt been finalized yet, our first hearing is next week. Right now I have her listed as the primary care giver, even though I really am, I pay for everything he needs, medical, college funds, ect... I am scheduled to pay her 500 a month right now, does this amount go up if she files for welfare? I give her a 70% chance of failure, she cant hold a job and only make min wage. What are the possible affects of having her listed as the primary parent if she does fail and I have to take my son?

Thanks for your advice!
PB

 

[TheGeekess]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CO

I am curious as to what happens to me if my ex files for welfare? We have split custody, the divorce decree hasnt been finalized yet, our first hearing is next week. Right now I have her listed as the primary care giver, even though I really am, I pay for everything he needs, medical, college funds, ect... I am scheduled to pay her 500 a month right now, does this amount go up if she files for welfare? I give her a 70% chance of failure, she cant hold a job and only make min wage. What are the possible affects of having her listed as the primary parent if she does fail and I have to take my son?

Thanks for your advice!
PB

Who takes him to the doctor? Who attends parent/teacher conferences? Who helps him with day to day activities?

Is the CS within state guidelines? Or is this an amount agreed to by both parties? Is/will CS be paid through the CSEA of your state?

If Mom ends up needing state assistance, then CS will be paid through CSEA and the state will take their cut. If your payments are below state standards, then they will be raised to those standards. CS is not set in stone.

Once custody is established, the court will be loathe to change it without a significant change of circumstances in the life of the child. Custody is not decided on who has more money.

 

[CSO286]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CO

I am curious as to what happens to me if my ex files for welfare? We have split custody, the divorce decree hasnt been finalized yet, our first hearing is next week. Right now I have her listed as the primary care giver, even though I really am, I pay for everything he needs, medical, college funds, ect... I am scheduled to pay her 500 a month right now, does this amount go up if she files for welfare? I give her a 70% chance of failure, she cant hold a job and only make min wage. What are the possible affects of having her listed as the primary parent if she does fail and I have to take my son?

Thanks for your advice!
PB

A 70% chance of failure at what?

And if she goes on public assitance while you are in the process of the dicvorce, then CO CSED will intervene to ensure support is set according to guidelines.

 

[Patrick2013]

Who takes him to the doctor? Who attends parent/teacher conferences? Who helps him with day to day activities?

Is the CS within state guidelines? Or is this an amount agreed to by both parties? Is/will CS be paid through the CSEA of your state?

If Mom ends up needing state assistance, then CS will be paid through CSEA and the state will take their cut. If your payments are below state standards, then they will be raised to those standards. CS is not set in stone.

Once custody is established, the court will be loathe to change it without a significant change of circumstances in the life of the child. Custody is not decided on who has more money.

I take him to the docs, he is old 1.5 so the second one doesnt apply, and the 3rd one is split as she works nights and I work days. She has no car, no license, and owes a few thousand until she can get those back. And when I made the remark about failing, I meant losing her place, as her disposable income is less than 300 a month after my child support (Based on the child support calculator provided by the state of CO). So you say that courts would be loathed to change custody, does her losing her place qualify. Should I just try and be the custodial parent right away, I am the more responsible and well off parent by far.

 

[Proserpina]

I take him to the docs, he is old 1.5 so the second one doesnt apply, and the 3rd one is split as she works nights and I work days. She has no car, no license, and owes a few thousand until she can get those back. And when I made the remark about failing, I meant losing her place, as her disposable income is less than 300 a month after my child support (Based on the child support calculator provided by the state of CO). So you say that courts would be loathed to change custody, does her losing her place qualify. Should I just try and be the custodial parent right away, I am the more responsible and well off parent by far.

Losing her place does not mean she's unfit.

Your financial situation is completely irrelevant.

 

[CSO286]

I take him to the docs, he is old 1.5 so the second one doesnt apply, and the 3rd one is split as she works nights and I work days. She has no car, no license, and owes a few thousand until she can get those back. And when I made the remark about failing, I meant losing her place, as her disposable income is less than 300 a month after my child support (Based on the child support calculator provided by the state of CO). So you say that courts would be loathed to change custody, does her losing her place qualify. Should I just try and be the custodial parent right away, I am the more responsible and well off parent by far.

You work days? How do you get him to the doctor?

Having a driver's license and a car are not prerequisites for parenting. Being in debt doesn't mean that she's unfit.

Also, Mom being on any form of public assistance doesn't automatically mean that you have an ace up your sleeve as far as becoming the primary parent. Sounds like, based on the info you provided, that mom might qualify for additional assistance--which again doesn't give you a leg up on her for primary parent.

The things that will determine who the primary parent will be are things like:

Who HAS been the primary parent?
Who does the meals for junior?
Kisses boo-boos?
Bathes and reads stories?
Takes him to the doctor?


Who provides the majority of the child's care?

The question is NOT: Who bankrolls the majority of the child's care?

 

[Patrick2013]

Losing her place does not mean she's unfit.

Your financial situation is completely irrelevant.

So not being able to provide a roof over his head while she has him does not qualify as unfit? What, is she supposed to take him to the shelter with her? What are the ramifications of having her listed as the primary? I appreciate all the help; I just want to make sure that I am not making a mistake that will haunt me by letting her be the primary.

 

[TheGeekess]

So not being able to provide a roof over his head while she has him does not qualify as unfit? What, is she supposed to take him to the shelter with her? What are the ramifications of having her listed as the primary? I appreciate all the help; I just want to make sure that I am not making a mistake that will haunt me by letting her be the primary.

Short answers: No. Yes.

 

[Patrick2013]

You work days? How do you get him to the doctor?

Having a driver's license and a car are not prerequisites for parenting. Being in debt doesn't mean that she's unfit.

Also, Mom being on any form of public assistance doesn't automatically mean that you have an ace up your sleeve as far as becoming the primary parent. Sounds like, based on the info you provided, that mom might qualify for additional assistance--which again doesn't give you a leg up on her for primary parent.

The things that will determine who the primary parent will be are things like:

Who HAS been the primary parent?
Who does the meals for junior?
Kisses boo-boos?
Bathes and reads stories?
Takes him to the doctor?


Who provides the majority of the child's care?

The question is NOT: Who bankrolls the majority of the child's care?

I take him in the car? I have a great job and can come and go as I please..

All the other stuff is split, as I do the parenting during the night, she does it during the day.

She has felony fines, no credit (as her felony is in credit fraud), no car, no lic, has not been able to maintain a min wage job over a year without being fired, would that not help my case in being the primary parent as it is in the BEST instrest of the child as CO is a child state? I make close to 6 figures, great credit, never been in trouble with the law and am responsible.

 

[TheGeekess]

I take him in the car? I have a great job and can come and go as I please..

All the other stuff is split, as I do the parenting during the night, she does it during the day.

She has felony fines, no credit (as her felony is in credit fraud), no car, no lic, has not been able to maintain a min wage job over a year without being fired, would that not help my case in being the primary parent as it is in the BEST instrest of the child as CO is a child state? I make close to 6 figures, great credit, never been in trouble with the law and am responsible.

None of that matters.

 

[Zigner]

You picked mom.

 

[CSO286]

I take him in the car? I have a great job and can come and go as I please..

All the other stuff is split, as I do the parenting during the night, she does it during the day.

She has felony fines, no credit (as her felony is in credit fraud), no car, no lic, has not been able to maintain a min wage job over a year without being fired, would that not help my case in being the primary parent as it is in the BEST instrest of the child as CO is a child state? I make close to 6 figures, great credit, never been in trouble with the law and am responsible.

CO is not going to take the child from the parent who does the MAJORITY OF THE PARENTING. (Based on the info you provided, you are not the child's primary caretaker.)

And you'll be unable to argue that Mom is unfit unless you can prove that she's a drug abusing prostitute who shoots up and services her clientele in front of and while beating Junior. Oh, and and drowns puppies in her spare time.

 

[Patrick2013]

None of that matters.

Ok, great, once again, should I fight and not have her named as the primary parent? What are the Rammifications of letting her be the primary parent, that is the real help I need.

I cant imagine that if the parenting is split that all of the above wouldnt weigh in as a deciding factor on what is best for the child, but you are the experts....

 

[Patrick2013]

CO is not going ot take the child from the parent who does the MAJORITY OF THE PARENTING. (Based on the info you proivded, youa re not the child's primary caretaker.

And you'll nto be able to argue that Mom is unfit unless you can prove that she's a drug abusing prostitute who shoots up and services her clientele in front of and while beating Junior. Oh, and and drowns puppies in her spare time.

How do you come to this conclusion? I have stated many times that parenting is SPLIT! Are you trying to tell me that because she has him in the morning that is greater than having him at nights? I obviously would be the one taking him to school activities, parent teacher conf, doctors... Starting to seem a little biased in here.

 

[Proserpina]

Ok, great, once again, should I fight and not have her named as the primary parent? What are the Rammifications of letting her be the primary parent, that is the real help I need.

I cant imagine that if the parenting is split that all of the above wouldnt weigh in as a deciding factor on what is best for the child, but you are the experts....

Look. The primary caregiver (and I'm NOT referring to money) generally has a major advantage during an initial custody determination.

Read this:

http://singleparents.about.com/od/childcustodylaws/a/colorado_child_custody_laws.htm

And this:

http://www.womenslaw.org/statutes_detail.php?statute_id=3842