Child threatened my stepdaughter at school

[moburkes]

Most of you obviously do not have children so this doesn't seem like a big deal to you...OR if you have children you just don't give a **** about their safety. You are NOT over-reacting in this matter if this kid has threatened her not once but twice then he needs to be dealt with. If the schools, police, or this kids parents won't do anything then go to the news.

Stop it with the assumptions. You're wrong.

 

[fairisfair]

Most of you obviously do not have children so this doesn't seem like a big deal to you...OR if you have children you just don't give a **** about their safety. You are NOT over-reacting in this matter if this kid has threatened her not once but twice then he needs to be dealt with. If the schools, police, or this kids parents won't do anything then go to the news.

Yeah, that's us. Kid haters. I simply put mine in Flak jackets and helmets. Saves on all that senseless worry stuff. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Of course this parent has a reason to be CONCERNED, but not to call in the FBI. Get over it.

 

[moburkes]

Yeah, that's us. Kid haters. I simply put mine in Flak jackets and helmets. Saves on all that senseless worry stuff. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Of course this parent has a reason to be CONCERNED, but not to call in the FBI. Get over it.

Flak jackets, that's funny. Although, they did show the gramda who lined her grandkids' backpacks with kevlar. Now THAT was smart. Just in case.

 

[kik1999]

... and that's what it's all about, right? Compassion? Do it for the kids. No matter how outlandish an idea might be, we have to do it to protect the kids.

That has got to be one of the most disingenuous arguments there is. After all, anybody that disagrees is automatically painted as an evil ogre, because they'll look like they don't care about children.

Instead of going off the deep end with criminal charges and restraining orders, have you considered asking for meeting with the child's parents? Has anyone called them to ascertain whether this child even has access to a firearm?

Just in case I wasn't clear in my first post... Yes, you are over-reacting.

In an instance where the parents don't care (as in this one), that would be a waste of time. Which is WHY we are bothered. Hard to get through to parents who are well aware of their child's issues, and seem to blow it off as if it were "normal" or make medical excuses. I have two children living in my house. Maybe because they're both girls (and I don't mean that in a sexist way, but they play with makeup and purses, not GI Joes and gun toys ~ except my 8 year old would rather play with Science kits dissecting frogs than dolls! ), but neither have EVER threatend anyone with violence - EVER. Let alone threatened a firearm. Let alone taking someone's life. It is 100% not acceptable to "joke" about killing someone, especially when there are kids out there really doing it. And if you don't show them the consequences now, while they are young, whose to say they won't grow up to be those same type of kids in high school.

I really feel bad for the boy, I do. My hubby is not trying to get him in trouble. However, for OUR peace of mind, and my stepdaughter's peice of mind (who which is very scared by the way b/c this kid is a bully), we think it would be best that he moves classrooms. This is overreacting???? I don't get how being careful is overreacting. But you are right, I am glad you are speaking your opinion, b/c we need to see all sides of the spectrum, even if I don't necessarily agree.

The reason I'm overreacting in elementary school is b/c people who think it can't happen this young are absolutely wrong. Let me be the ONE person who stands up and says something before an ACCIDENT happens. Do I think a 9 year old is capable of plotting a murder? Probably not. Do I think a 9 year old might possibly do it for attention? Absolutely. I would rather err on the side of caution, before ANY child at that school becomes a statistic on ACCIDENT.

If that makes me "over-react" and seem like I'm freaking out, so be it. I would MUCH rather be safe than sorry.

 

[kik1999]

Yeah, that's us. Kid haters. I simply put mine in Flak jackets and helmets. Saves on all that senseless worry stuff. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Of course this parent has a reason to be CONCERNED, but not to call in the FBI. Get over it.

I never once mentioned talking to the FBI, and actually, the only reason the police were mentioned is b/c my hubby wants to have this DOCUMENTED. That is it! But now that the school won't move his classroom, THAT is why he is looking into the restraining order. So the school doesn't have a choice but to move his class. All he is asking is that the kid be removed from her classroom and if the school won't comply, he will be filing a RO. The daughter should not have to worry about this at school. School SHOULD be a safe haven, especially at their age!

 

[fairisfair]

I never once mentioned talking to the FBI, and actually, the only reason the police were mentioned is b/c my hubby wants to have this DOCUMENTED. That is it! But now that the school won't move his classroom, THAT is why he is looking into the restraining order. So the school doesn't have a choice but to move his class. All he is asking is that the kid be removed from her classroom and if the school won't comply, he will be filing a RO. The daughter should not have to worry about this at school. School SHOULD be a safe haven, especially at their age!

and I did not post this response to you. Get over yourself.

I agree, the children should be separated, if that makes your child feel more comfortable. However, I can also see that it is quite possibly YOU who are scaring the hell out of her.

 

[Curt581]

Yet another "Helicopter Parent" takes flight.

Cue the "Flight of the Valkyries" music from Apocalypse Now. Colonel Kilgore is on the way!

Dun DUN dahdah DAH duh, dun duhduh DAH duuhh!

 

[kik1999]

and I did not post this response to you. Get over yourself.

I agree, the children should be separated, if that makes your child feel more comfortable. However, I can also see that it is quite possibly YOU who are scaring the hell out of her.

I understand you didn't post it to me, however, I believe we're all entitled to respond to what ever posts we want, correct? I was commenting on your post. Thanks. And I'm not into myself that much sweetie.

I didn't scare the hell out of anyone. We're definitely making it as much of a non issue as possible at home. The only thing we DID make sure of, is that she didn't repeat the story to her friends at school b/c this child who threatend her doesn't need any more embarrassment, or any more to add to his obviously out of control rage or anger.

 

[kik1999]

Yet another "Helicopter Parent" takes flight.

Cue the "Flight of the Valkyries" music from Apocalypse Now. Colonel Kilgore is on the way!

Dun DUN dahdah DAH duh, dun duhduh DAH duuhh!

Ya know...we're ALL entitled to our opinions here, right? Yours isn't any better than mine, just because it's different. I truly appreciate OG's LEGAL response. Frankly, her credentials are well respected in MY OPINION.

I believe since this happened the day after the Cleveland shootings, it was noteworthy of more than a week vacation for this child and back to normal. I believe all children should learn the CONSEQUENCES to their actions. And I'm hoping his parents will get him the help he needs. Once again, I FEEL BAD for this kid. I'm not trying to get him locked up for Christ's sake. But it is not ok to go around JOKING about killing someone, whether you are 5 or 65!

Once again, I will post back as to what happens. The police actually ASKED us to bring the stepdaughter in, so we'll be doing that this afternoon. Whether or not you think my hubby is overreacting is not really the point, I guess. Had he not said anything, he would have been a horrible parent for not protecting his little girl.

 

[moburkes]

Ya know...we're ALL entitled to our opinions here, right? Yours isn't any better than mine, just because it's different. I truly appreciate OG's LEGAL response. Frankly, her credentials are well respected in MY OPINION.

I believe since this happened the day after the Cleveland shootings, it was noteworthy of more than a week vacation for this child and back to normal. I believe all children should learn the CONSEQUENCES to their actions. And I'm hoping his parents will get him the help he needs. Once again, I FEEL BAD for this kid. I'm not trying to get him locked up for Christ's sake. But it is not ok to go around JOKING about killing someone, whether you are 5 or 65!

Once again, I will post back as to what happens. The police actually ASKED us to bring the stepdaughter in, so we'll be doing that this afternoon. Whether or not you think my hubby is overreacting is not really the point, I guess. Had he not said anything, he would have been a horrible parent for not protecting his little girl.

Why his punishment should be more severe since another crime was committed the day before is beyond me. I surely hope that the court system doesn't share your view.

Well, ma'am, since you were speeding 5 miles over the speed limit just after the drunk driver killed 12 people yesterday, your punishment is JAIL for 5 years.

Where do you get this logic?

 

[Ozark_Sophist]

Flak jackets, that's funny. Although, they did show the gramda who lined her grandkids' backpacks with kevlar. Now THAT was smart. Just in case.

It's not just grandma. Some guy is marketing the packs.

Personal security forces (I've seen Israeli - Sharon and US Secret Service - Clinton, after he left office and was visiting Europe) deploy kevlar shield briefcases. Flip the latch and the accordian style shield unfolds to 2'x4'. Interesting tactics. i wonder if it work with a three ring binder?

 

[Curt581]

Ya know...we're ALL entitled to our opinions here, right? Yours isn't any better than mine, just because it's different. I truly appreciate OG's LEGAL response. Frankly, her credentials are well respected in MY OPINION.

Yep, opinions... They're like sphincters. Everybody's got one, they're not afraid to let you hear it, and they nearly always stink.

While that legal opinion might be technically correct in some areas, no judge worth a darn would grant a restraining order against a nine year old without some pretty compelling evidence that the child was truly a danger. I mean more than recess words.

I believe since this happened the day after the Cleveland shootings, it was noteworthy of more than a week vacation for this child and back to normal. I believe all children should learn the CONSEQUENCES to their actions. And I'm hoping his parents will get him the help he needs. Once again, I FEEL BAD for this kid. I'm not trying to get him locked up for Christ's sake. But it is not ok to go around JOKING about killing someone, whether you are 5 or 65!

You're taking something in the news and applying it to your own situation. The news is seldom statistical reality. Far more people get hit by lightening every year than get shot in a school. Should we ban golf courses? Even more kids are killed by drunk drivers. Why haven't we banned alcoholic beverages?

Once again, I will post back as to what happens. The police actually ASKED us to bring the stepdaughter in, so we'll be doing that this afternoon.

Try not to be surprised when you find his parents are just as scared and willing to defend their kid as you are, albeit for different reasons.

Whether or not you think my hubby is overreacting is not really the point, I guess.

As I recall, one of your first questions was: "Is he over-reacting?"

Had he not said anything, he would have been a horrible parent for not protecting his little girl.

To whom?

Is he worried about his kid's safety, or other people's perception of him?

 

[kik1999]

Why his punishment should be more severe since another crime was committed the day before is beyond me. I surely hope that the court system doesn't share your view.

Well, ma'am, since you were speeding 5 miles over the speed limit just after the drunk driver killed 12 people yesterday, your punishment is JAIL for 5 years.

Where do you get this logic?

It had nothing to do with what should happen to this child, I was simply trying to state that it hits home with US b/c of a near by recent school shooting. I don't think he should get punished more b/c of a totally different situation at a totally different school.

 

[kik1999]

Yep, opinions... They're like sphincters. Everybody's got one, they're not afraid to let you hear it, and they nearly always stink.

While that legal opinion might be technically correct in some areas, no judge worth a darn would grant a restraining order against a nine year old without some pretty compelling evidence that the child was truly a danger. I mean more than recess words.



You're taking something in the news and applying it to your own situation. The news is seldom statistical reality. Far more people get hit by lightening every year than get shot in a school. Should we ban golf courses? Even more kids are killed by drunk drivers. Why haven't we banned alcoholic beverages?



Try not to be surprised when you find his parents are just as scared and willing to defend their kid as you are, albeit for different reasons.



As I recall, one of your first questions was: "Is he over-reacting?"



To whom?

Is he worried about his kid's safety, or other people's perception of him?

He is worried of his child's safety. You hear about these kids who had warning signs before, and no one said a damn thing. We simply want it documented, want the kids to be separated, and if the boy's issues are truly as serious as the school states (how many other 9 year olds are checked daily for drugs and weapons PRIOR to this incident?), possibly removed from the school and put in a school who is specialized in handling these types of children. The distraction is taking the teacher's attention away from the kids who are there to learn...this is according to the principal, who states every staff member watches his every move. The attitudes of people who think we are overreacting, make me wonder how many other kids who have been bullied by this kid, and didn't say a thing. We would rather be safe than sorry.

You are entitled to your opinion, I am entitled to mine. Debate me all day long, but it doesn't change the fact that my hubby's daughter was threatened, and the police think it's serious enough to bring the child in to document, which is what we want.

I would expect his parents to defend him to an extent. However, I can't imagine that a parent under ANY circumstances would justify that this is acceptable behavior. I can't imagine telling my child, "it's ok that you threatened someone's life, b/c you have an anger problem that can't be controlled". Personally, if my child's medical issues were SO severe that they repeatedly (twice to my child, unknown times to additional children), I wouldn't want to jeapordize ANYONE'S kids by allowing him to attend public school. There are special schools for these types of situations. I would assume the kid would get better educational tools at schools better suited for his needs.

Thanks for your opinions. I respect them even if I don't agree. Wish some of you could say the same.

 

[Ohiogal]

Yep, opinions... They're like sphincters. Everybody's got one, they're not afraid to let you hear it, and they nearly always stink.

While that legal opinion might be technically correct in some areas, no judge worth a darn would grant a restraining order against a nine year old without some pretty compelling evidence that the child was truly a danger. I mean more than recess words.

I have seen restraining orders issued against children. This child if I read correctly has "medical issues". If this child has a history of making threats and violent actions, then it is very possible that a juvenile court judge WOULD issue a restraining order.

You're taking something in the news and applying it to your own situation. The news is seldom statistical reality. Far more people get hit by lightening every year than get shot in a school. Should we ban golf courses? Even more kids are killed by drunk drivers. Why haven't we banned alcoholic beverages?

I dont know why we haven't banned alcohol. As for golf courses, isn't that just wrongly used pasture field?

Try not to be surprised when you find his parents are just as scared and willing to defend their kid as you are, albeit for different reasons.

And if this child has a history of it, the parents may (PLEASE NOTE THE IFS AND MAYS) be facing major problems.

As I recall, one of your first questions was: "Is he over-reacting?"

I do not believe he was overreacting necessarily. Filing a report is not overreacting. Filing for a restraining order is not necessarily overreacting.

To whom?

Is he worried about his kid's safety, or other people's perception of him?

If he is seriously concerned about his child's safety then it is not overreacting. Other people may believe it is but I also know if I had to I would be getting a restraining order against a child as well.