childcustody/childsupport

[kc62]

i have recently moved and fell behind in childsupport. My ex's brother, who is a lawyer contacted me with the request to take one of the children, my ex been trying to get rid off, and continue paying support for the other son we have and at the same time waive all rights to receive support from her. I have a family of three small children and a sick wife and can't afford to take care of my older (teenage) son. Also, i will be retireing from the military in April 01, and am therefore financially unstable. My Ex's brother threatend me to go to court in Florida where the original divorce was settled to make them give me the child and/or to get more support. I corresponded that I will pay all moneys owed back by Tax time and continue to pay the court settled amount.what can they really do? And can my Ex's brother represent her in court, he would only act in her favorite.

 

[p towle]

Hard to follow here but rec that you get a free consult with an attny.
i am not an attny but offer this from experience.

 

[ndea25]

I agree with you, JLK. How very sad that you do not want this child. I also find it very disturbing that you say, "I have a family of three small children and a sick wife and can't afford to take care of my older (teenage) son." Your son was your responsibility before this other family. What do you plan to do when you retire from the military? Just because you're retiring from one job, it shouldn't mean you can't get another. You still have to help support ALL of your children.

 

[kc62]

sorry you guys feel this way, but you have no idea what i have went through in the past. I had the boy for over a year, first let me say he's a diabetic and me and my wife virtually pebbelt him up. Everything was fine untill my ex interfered, and telles the child he don't have to cooperate with my wife and should hit her as she was 6 months pregnant. It came as far as the police showing up constantly because he joined gangs, and my ex told him that was okay. On severral occasions he hurt my younger son by useing wrestling moves. My ex called constantly to stirr up mess. So who ist right? She wanted him to destroy my marrige, but now that she has married she don't want to taste her own medicine. Best interest, maybe nobody knows how hard it is to adjust to civilian live after i served this country for 20 years, nevermind trying to get a job, with only combat experience. So, where ist the best interest? I can't offer him things Teenagers need, I'm gonna have to try to find any job I can, My wife has a heartdesase, she can't work, so it's left up to me. My ex and her new husband both have jobs, good paying jobs, and to seperate the brothers, what about that? So I'm certainly the hurt person, I wanted both kids from the beginnning, she denied, was out to hurt me. So I gave her what she wanted.Taste of her own creation? And its right that she wouldn't have to pay me no suport after I had him for over a year, and she never send a dime, I had to file Bankruptcy, we get paid less than min. wage. Don't milk me!!

 

[ndea25]

Listen. I am sorry that you are having a hard time, but I am also sorry for your son. It sounds to me like he has emotional problems that were maybe caused or worsened by your ex. Usually when kids act out like that and join gangs, etc. it's because they're having a hard time dealing with certain things. This is all understandable including how you feel but you can't just write him off. Maybe if you take him in, you could get him some help. You're financially responsible for him anyway and at least you would know the money was going to him and your ex wasn't using it for herself. "Best interest" is the best interest of your child and since his mom sounds like a wack job, his best ineterest might be to be with you. Also, I'm quite sure that your ex could have her brother represent her in court. Why not? Yes, he would be acting in her favor but your attorney would act in your favor, too, because you're the one paying him. When you had him for that year, who had custody? If you didn't, did you file for custody and try and get child support? If not, there's nothing you can do about that. You should have filed then because then you could be taking her to court for back child support. I understand your concerns for your family but no matter what, this child was there first and you just can't abandon him for a new family. Good luck!