Childs Last Name

[FFuries]

What is the name of your state? Florida

My son has a daughter with his ex-girlfriend, we paid for the DNA tests to confirm she was his child. He pays child support, has none in arrears. The birth certificate has his name as the father, the child has his name hyphen Ex-GF name as the last name. The Ex-GF has since gotten married, and has begun using her husbands name as the childs last name. She has her resistered this way for day care etc, and has informed us that we are not to confuse the child by telling her our name. Is this legal?

My son is trying to save up the money required to get a lawyer, but until this gets into the courts his hands are tied. There is no court ordered custody or visitation at this time. She resides with her mother. Should he just add this to the growing list of documentation, along with the other attempts of alienation?

Also which court should he file through? He is stationed in SC, his ex is moving to SC where her husband is stationed for school. Child was born in FL and child support ordered by FL courts.

 

[CJane]

If Mom is not in SC YET, jurisdiction CURRENTLY is wherever she lives with the child. SC will not have jurisdiction until Mom has lived THERE with the child for 6 months.

I know with military cases, sometimes "home state" jacks with that too.

What Mom is doing isn't illegal. It isn't NICE, but it's not illegal.

 

[Isis1]

what dad can do, is disregard what mom said. she cannot tell you what to do. now, it would be good if dad AND you just to not mention it to the child. when the child gets registered at the school. they will take note of the name on the birth certificate.

 

[bridgemom]

Like the above poster stated, when the child gets registered for school they need a birth certificate.

When I registered my daughter for kindergarten, I needed the birth certificate (due to a mix up it had not been changed and needed to submit proof that she had been using her current last name for the last few years) AND the court order with the name change.

So, I would assume that your granddaughter will be registered under her legal name.

 

[padmelupin]

Mother had been telling kidlet for a while that he was named Kidlet Mom's name, when the divorce decree specifically says his name is Kidlet Dad's name-Mom's name.

Every time Kidlet said his name ala Mom, we just reminded him of his actual name. It stopped eventually, and Kidlet knows his name now.

Like the above poster stated, when the child gets registered for school they need a birth certificate.

When I registered my daughter for kindergarten, I needed the birth certificate (due to a mix up it had not been changed and needed to submit proof that she had been using her current last name for the last few years) AND the court order with the name change.

So, I would assume that your granddaughter will be registered under her legal name.

My husband had to do this for my stepson. His birth cert never got changed either, but school took the CO and he's registered correctly.

 

[FFuries]

Right now all we do is tell our son not to take any action on his own. Just document all the issues etc, we also do the same thing on our end on a desk calander. That way when he can afford to get a lawyer and go to court, he'll have all the documention.

This is not to say that he's perfect, he has made his share of mistakes during this process. It's been a learning experience for us all. I'm learning that even after your children grow up and leave the house it doesn't mean parenthood ends. We are just trying to give/get him the best advice we can.

Thanks for all the great advice thus far.

Added: When my wife or I correct our grand-daughter regarding her name, we get chastised later by the Mom. She has also got her referring to our son by his name, and her husband as Daddy, going as far as to tell the child that her and hubby made her. More ammo for our son in the long-run, but confusing for the child.