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Child's Mother Pressuring For Support, Not Owed

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New member
I'm currently in Arizona.

Had a child with someone I dated over 20 years ago. Over the next few years the mother basically began to cut me off, changed her cell number and moved away.

I eventually left the state in 2010.

Never heard from the mother again (I've had the same cell number for over 20 years) - until last week.

She starts texting me out of the blue (from a Google voice number), claiming that I owe 16 years of support.

We never went to court, we were never married, etc.

I spoke with a lawyer from NYC who did several court searches. He said the mother never filed anything against me in court, ever.

Having said that, the child is now 21.

The lawyer indicates that because we never went to court, there was never a court order and because the child is now 21 - I owe nothing and she doesn't have a leg to stand on - based on NYC law.

There was never even an acknowledgment of paternity signed.

Despite passing the information along and telling her to confirm on her own or with an attorney, she continues to harass me, claiming that I owe 16 years of support.

In her last text, she claims that she will be taking me to court.

The lawyer I consulted with, said the court will reject her petition for a support order based on child's age. That she can't file for a support order once the child is 21 and certainly can't enforce back support without a pre-existing order.

Is there anything to worry about at this point?


Obvious Observer
If the mother and the child have been in AZ all this time, then NY law on child support is irrelevant. Mind you, there are generalities that basically hold from state to state.

If the mother and child have been in NY all this time, then yes, NY would have jurisdiction.

If the mother never filed for child support and the child is now 21, then yes, you are "off the hook". Child support is generally only backdated to the date someone has filed for it. If the mother indeed filed 16 years ago and used some form of alternative service, it is possible that she has a default judgement somewhere, but unlikely, or at least your lawyer didn't find it.

Your lack of relationship with your child was your choice. You did not legally establish your paternity, and you never petitioned for visitation.

Note: if she tries taking it to court, request to appear telephonically. (Just because she doesn't have a leg to stand on doesn't mean that she won't try.)
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Super Secret Senior Member
...she doesn't have a leg to stand on - based on NYC law.
Just to clarify, NYC has no such laws - those statutes exist on a state level.

Your attorney is probably correct. I would block this woman's number and forget about her. Does she still live in Arizona? If so then you may want to consult with an Arizona family law attorney to set your mind at ease - and to have someone lined up just in case.
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