Confused And Fed Up But Need Help

[gothicfavors]

What is the name of your state? New Jersey

My ex-husband and i have been divorced for 3 years now and according to our original visitation agreement he has to come into the state to get the kids and bring them back. I now have to drive to Florida to pick up my children because he's telling me he can't afford to send them home by either plane, train or bus.
My question is this:

1- can anyone point me in the right direction to find the forms i need to modify his visitation to where he either has to visit with them here in NJ or show valid proof of round-trip ticket

and

2- My youngest child, she's 6, has said that she no longer wants to visit with him, her biological father,out of state. the "parental bond" that most father's have is not with him, it's with my boyfriend who has been a "father" to her for 5yrs. Does she have to be "forced" to go with her biological father for visitation?

We, my boyfriend and I, realize that he has no rights to my children since he is not their biological father or a legal stepparent, but feel having to force her to go would do emotional harm.

 

[titansfan]

court orders must be obeyed

tell you ex he must abide by th court order-accoroding to the court order, transportation is his responsibilty, not yours, and if he does not bring the kids back, you will file contempt charges. as for the kids, they have no choice, they either go, or you could be held in contempt, kids dont decide they arent going to visit the ncp, no matter how much they love your bf, he isnt thier father, and all of you must abide by the court order.

 

[gothicfavors]

we, my boyfriend and I, have followed the agreement to the T from day 1.
I "made" my youngest go this year to get to know her father, since this is the 1st visit he's had with her since she was born(he left ust shortly after she was born). I've told him time and time again that i am going to file the contempt charges and he told me if i do 'he will "take off" again and this time with the children and i'll never find them or if i do by the time i do they'll never want to come home by me'. When i spoke with the court today they told me it's a minimum of 3 months waiting period to get the matter on the docket and school starts in 2 weeks. If i leave them there it can be considered by Florida court as custodial abandonment and he can file for custody.

 

[snostar]

Why would you even consider leaving your child there? GO GET THEM! File contempt and a petition to modified the visitation order. Speak to an attorney about the threats. Visitations will not be terminated regardless of your perception that the parental bond is nonexistent.

 

[gothicfavors]

I have not intentions on leaving them there. We are driving from NJ to FL to go get them.

 

[youdontknowme]

I have not intentions on leaving them there. We are driving from NJ to FL to go get them.

In addition, make sure you keep track of all reciepts for all charges incurred -- gas, mileage, overnight stays, meals, etc. Plus, if you missed work to pick them up -- lost wages.

In your contempt, ask that all charges you incurred be reimbursed (you might want to include copies of reciepts as well).

 

[usmcfamily]

I have not intentions on leaving them there. We are driving from NJ to FL to go get them.

Really -- then what is this.......
If i leave them there it can be considered by Florida court as custodial abandonment and he can file for custody.

I can certainly see where snostar's question came from.

 

[gothicfavors]

That's what the court told me. "If i had left them there" was probably a bad phrase choice. What was meant was if I left them with their father until it was heard in court, he could file for custody b/c it wold be considered cp abandonment. now i have no intention of leaving them there that long. My bf and i are going to get them next weekend when he can take a day from his job to help drive since i physically cannot drive that type of distance alone b/c of the injuries i sustained from a drunk driver head on from 3 yrs ago.

 

[stealth2]

Where in FL are they?

 

[Zephyr]

tell you ex he must abide by th court order-



her telling him that is not going to make him do the right thing, as I said before, almost all of your advice is worthless because that it all you ever say is, tell him/her. anyone can tell anyone anything and it doesn't mean squat, and won't change what they are doing, don't you get that?


op, follow the other advice, go get your kids, keep paperwork on all of your expenses, file the contempt, and modification.

 

[gothicfavors]

they're in Jacksonville