constant neighbor harrassment

[Haileyfam4advise]

i just moved into a new town home barely 2 months ago . its privately owned and HOA, from day 1 my husband asked her to please let us know if our girls are too loud or give even a little info to go on if we disturb her in any way etc. we are a busy normal family and my husband has had 6 major surgeries aqnd i have ptsd and severe anxiety, and depression. she has been informed of all of it and continues to ntimidate and bang on our walls jut for trying to get setled in and unpack and get a routine down before school starts. a pivare property mgr has been hired, cops were called by me because i was close to needing an ambulance , and shes a nurse supposedly and continues this behavior, im always worrried about every move or sound we make, what to do?

 

[xylene]

I realizes this could be difficult, but you really should find a way to move to a detached house where the ordinary foibles of people living very very close together will not so severely exacerbate your medical condition.

 

[Shadowbunny]

i just moved into a new town home barely 2 months ago . its privately owned and HOA, from day 1 my husband asked her to please let us know if our girls are too loud or give even a little info to go on if we disturb her in any way etc. we are a busy normal family and my husband has had 6 major surgeries aqnd i have ptsd and severe anxiety, and depression. she has been informed of all of it and continues to ntimidate and bang on our walls jut for trying to get setled in and unpack and get a routine down before school starts. a pivare property mgr has been hired, cops were called by me because i was close to needing an ambulance , and shes a nurse supposedly and continues this behavior, im always worrried about every move or sound we make, what to do?

So the neighbor banged on your wall in response to the noise your family was making, then you called the police? Have you talked to your neighbor?

 

[Haileyfam4advise]

So the neighbor banged on your wall in response to the noise your family was making, then you called the police? Have you talked to your neighbor?

Yes my husband actually talked to her while moving in and asked her or her son to let us know if we ever get too loud sure to kids, we've always had shared walls and it's not new to them at all, we're actually very aware what some things sound like thru this walls, and are considerate of those around us, but she's out of hand with it, we've now called cops 3xs since my post and it's looking like its mostly her son ,but it's actually caused me kids to start feeling anxieties to be home and frustrated that I can't unpack or do anything to get the house in order past the move, and this has caused me to intensify my therapy and take on more appts than originally planned, I'm not even down playing or exaggerating, it could start by us opening the door coming home from errands, which happened a few days ago, there was a pre existing problem with same people and never disclosed to us before hand, it sucks, but heads up woulda been useful to make nice with these people and make a point to know what lives we lead and find common ground, that's who we are, we are very social but never push ourselves onto neighbors because it is rude to do until you get a feel for each ones vibes with passing pleasantries etc, bottom line they're causing my kids distress and that's definitely not ok it will be tolerated, I'll take it to court if needed I'm not able to just up and move if that happens she's going to cover all expenses there way I see it now, she's lying to or HOA and sound like we're causing trouble and we're simply moving in,

 

[xylene]

You've called the police 3 times over wall banging?

I think you are veering on harassing them.

Perhaps you condition is more severe than you realize. Your actions and situation are not very sympathetic.

Try to live normally including taking care of your home. If they bang on the walls ignore it.

If you take medication, perhaps they are out of balance. These responses to this situation is disproportional to the reality as you describe it.

I stand by my initial suggestion that it would be best to live in detachted housing. I understand that's a financial hardship.

 

[Shadowbunny]

Yes my husband actually talked to her while moving in and asked her or her son to let us know if we ever get too loud sure to kids, we've always had shared walls and it's not new to them at all, we're actually very aware what some things sound like thru this walls, and are considerate of those around us, but she's out of hand with it, we've now called cops 3xs since my post and it's looking like its mostly her son ,but it's actually caused me kids to start feeling anxieties to be home and frustrated that I can't unpack or do anything to get the house in order past the move, and this has caused me to intensify my therapy and take on more appts than originally planned, I'm not even down playing or exaggerating, it could start by us opening the door coming home from errands, which happened a few days ago, there was a pre existing problem with same people and never disclosed to us before hand, it sucks, but heads up woulda been useful to make nice with these people and make a point to know what lives we lead and find common ground, that's who we are, we are very social but never push ourselves onto neighbors because it is rude to do until you get a feel for each ones vibes with passing pleasantries etc, bottom line they're causing my kids distress and that's definitely not ok it will be tolerated, I'll take it to court if needed I'm not able to just up and move if that happens she's going to cover all expenses there way I see it now, she's lying to or HOA and sound like we're causing trouble and we're simply moving in,

I think you're missing my point: rather than calling the police when they bang on your walls, how about going over and talking to them? Right then. You're counting the fact that your husband tried to preemptively smooth the way while you guys were moving in, but I'm saying you should talk to the neighbors rather than call the cops on them. Because, quite honestly, that is ridiculous. And a waste of police time. You have made this worse by calling the cops.

And what do you think you can take to the courts? They'll say you are the one making all the noise and that you're harassing them by calling the police for no reason. So stop calling the cops. Go over now, before they feel like they have to bang on a wall, and offer an olive branch. Who knows -- maybe both of you will start behaving better.

 

[FarmerJ]

Your town home must not have a ounce of insulation between units in the walls to sound proof Or its Not a new building but 40 0r more years old , Sounds should not transmit that easily from one unit to another if the walls between them were properly insulated. Plan on moving out as soon as your lease allows.