Contempt?

[angiesmom]

What is the name of your state? MN

About 2 and a half years ago, my ex boyfriend took me to court and was awarded supervised visits of our daughter for 120 days and then unsupervised after that. He saw her for about 6 months and then left and went out of state for 3 months. He has emailed me periodically, like once every 6 months, in the last 2 years asking to see our daughter and I just never responded to him. Now he has been calling and emailing me, claiming that I am in contempt of court because he has a visitation order.

Is the order still in effect even though he hasn't seen our daughter in almost 2 years?

Someone please help me! I have all the paper work in front of me if you need any more info to help me.

 

[MrsK]

Yes, the order is still in effect.

 

[angiesmom]

What action can he take against me? Is there anything I can do to prevent him from seeing our daughter? She is only 3 and she hasn't seen him in almost 2 years. She doesn't know who he is anymore and I'm afraid that he will see her for a couple months and then take off again.

 

[weenor]

What action can he take against me? Is there anything I can do to prevent him from seeing our daughter? She is only 3 and she hasn't seen him in almost 2 years. She doesn't know who he is anymore and I'm afraid that he will see her for a couple months and then take off again.

Note that visitation is a right not an obligation. He does not have to visit, but you do have to provide your daughter in accordance with the court order upon request. He can file a rule ni si for the court to hold you in contempt and you will be admonished by the court and probably end up paying his attorneys' fees. It would be wise if you don't want to follow the order, to file a petition for modification. In the meantime follow the court order.

 

[Zephyr]

why are you not promoting a chance for your child to get to know dad again?

is the order any more specific about times, places, etc for visits for dad?

 

[angiesmom]

why are you not promoting a chance for your child to get to know dad again?

is the order any more specific about times, places, etc for visits for dad?

I am not promoting it because I have no faith that he will stick around this time. He has 4 kids all by different moms, none of which he is constistently involved with. I am scared he's going to hurt my daughter emotionally by coming in and out of her life, like she'll end up with abandonment issues.

Specifics:

Petitioner (dad) shall have supervised parenting time for a period of 120 days, commencing January 12, 2004 and continuing until August 12, 2004. During this period, the Petitioner shall have supervised parenting time with the minor child of the parties as follows:
a. Two visits per week, for 2-3 hours per visit
b. Each visit shall be supervised by either: NSA, JL. In the alternative, the parties shall cooperate with and utilize the Family Access Center for the purposes of coordinating and scheduling Respondent's parenting time. Petitioner's parenting time at the Family Access Center shall be monitored and not supervised.

3. Following the 120-day period, if that interval of supervised parenting time has gone well, it is the expectation of the Court that Petitioner shall have unsupervised parenting time with the child on substantially the same schedule and duration as described above for the supervised parenting time. It is also the Court's expectation that as the child gets older, and again assuming no significant problems or difficulties related to parenting time have arisen, that Petitioner shall have parenting time with the child in increasing duration and frequency. Such increased parenting time shall be on a schedule and for lengths of time agreed upon by both the parties. If the parties are unable to agree, either may bring the issue back to court for resolution by fililng the appropriate motion.

 

[angiesmom]

4. Commencing immediately, as and for additional parenting time, the Petitioner shall have the minor child of the parties:
a. Every Father's Day
b. A portion of the minor child's birthday, with specific times to be determines as and split between the parties
etc, ect

6 The petitioner shall have liberal and reasonable telephone contact with the minor child of the parties 2-3 times per week.

With Father's Day coming up, if I just don't answer or respond to his calls and emails and he hasn't seen our daughter in 2 years, can he really expect me to let him take her? And since he did complete the supervised visitation last time, can I at least have him do another 120 days of supervised visits?

 

[wandasmommy]

he has rights too

What action can he take against me? Is there anything I can do to prevent him from seeing our daughter? She is only 3 and she hasn't seen him in almost 2 years. She doesn't know who he is anymore and I'm afraid that he will see her for a couple months and then take off again.

you could also eventually lose custody if you dont follow the court order. unless you can prove him unfit, theres nothing you can do to prevent him from seeing the child. you chose him to have a baby with, he has any many rights as you do,you'll just have to accept that fact.

 

[angiesmom]

Even though he has basically abandoned her for the last two years? Isn't there any abandoment law or anything that would nullify the visitation order? Can I at least ask for the supervised visitation to be started over? He hasn't seen her in two years! She doesn't even know him anymore. If I just said this is your dad and he's taking you for the day, she's be scared out of her mind!

 

[texh]

Interesting

Even though he has basically abandoned her for the last two years? Isn't there any abandoment law or anything that would nullify the visitation order? Can I at least ask for the supervised visitation to be started over? He hasn't seen her in two years! She doesn't even know him anymore. If I just said this is your dad and he's taking you for the day, she's be scared out of her mind!

In your original question, you admitted he has attempted contacting you off and on for those last two years and you ignored him. YOU are the reason he's been absent for two years.

This is the same thing my husband's ex does to him. She withheld the children for four years. We finally got a great visitation order, yet she keeps trying to deny further visits and keeps yelling at him that he "didn't see those kids for 4 years".

It was those kind of antics (among other things) that ended up giving my hubby a very liberal visitation order.

 

[angiesmom]

Your husband probably actually tried to see his kids. My ex will email me once every six months or so and when I don't reply, that's the end of it. He doesn't really want to see her, he just wants to cause me grief.

 

[Zephyr]

Even though he has basically abandoned her for the last two years? Isn't there any abandoment law or anything that would nullify the visitation order? Can I at least ask for the supervised visitation to be started over? He hasn't seen her in two years! She doesn't even know him anymore. If I just said this is your dad and he's taking you for the day, she's be scared out of her mind!

have you asked dad if he wouldn't mind doing a couple supervised visits first just to get the child used to him again? or start the visit with him coming to pick her up at the house and visiting for an hour at home before he actually leaves with her....makes the transition less drastic.

she'll be scared out of her mind if you teach her to be, if you promote her dad as a positive...why would she be scared?

 

[angiesmom]

have you asked dad if he wouldn't mind doing a couple supervised visits first just to get the child used to him again? or start the visit with him coming to pick her up at the house and visiting for an hour at home before he actually leaves with her....makes the transition less drastic.

she'll be scared out of her mind if you teach her to be, if you promote her dad as a positive...why would she be scared?

No, I haven't asked him... I wasn't sure if I should reply to him or not since that would acknowledge that I have received his emails. Knowing him, he's going to try to be as much of a jerk as possible, so he probably won't agree to supervised visits unless he legally has to. Does he legally have do supervised since he hasn't seen her in two years?

I've never talked to her about her dad. She doesn't ask, so I don't bring it up. I know I will have to someday, I'm just not sure how to go about it.

 

[texh]

Maybe, maybe not

Your husband probably actually tried to see his kids. My ex will email me once every six months or so and when I don't reply, that's the end of it. He doesn't really want to see her, he just wants to cause me grief.

Or, this might be about the child and not you. In fact, he could be like my hubby in the fact that he doesn't know his legal rights. He might also be similar in the fact that once he found out his rights, he needed a few months to save money for an attorney.

BTW, my hubby's ex thinks it's about causing her grief, too. Every thing isn't necessarily about you.

I understand that you might still be bitter about your relationship with the father. But you need to get over it for you child's sake.

Bottom line, you need to follow the court order. If he is truly unfit, there are legal remedies. Until then, you need to abide by the order, otherwise you are in contempt.


There are some great legal minds on this site, I'm sure you'll get some good advice.

 

[angiesmom]

I agree, there are great legal minds on this site! Its very nice to be able to get such quick replies about legal questions without having to pay thousands of dollars!

I realize that I have no choice but to let him see her, but can I LEGALLY ask that the supervised visitation be restarted with out having to take him back to court. Or can he LEGALLY just pick up where he left off on the court order?