CP wanting to relocate

[DoTheRightThing]

What is the name of your state? Ohio

I have 2 teenage children from my first marriage. My ex-husband and I have a very open parenting plan, and basically threw out the silly thing as soon as our divorce was final. I am the custodial parent, and he gets frequent visitation. This was not always the case, though. Shortly after our divorce - more than 10 years ago - he decided to leave the state to pursue different job options. He visited on average of twice a year, during which times he would stay with his parents with the children. After a couple of years, he moved back to Ohio, and since then has had visitation almost every weekend, and several weeks in the summer, and we split holidays according to who has what planned. Like I said, very open and relaxed schedules. It may not work for all, but it works for us, and most importantly, the children.

My husband and I are contemplating a move to Oregon. There are several reasons for this move: my husband suffers from a lung disorder and his doctors have advised him to consider living somewhere with less humidity; my grandparents live in Oregon and are getting to the age where they could use extra care, to keep them from having to go into nursing homes, and other family members-although helpful- aren't as able to care for them as I would be; there are other family members in Oregon, including my father, who I would love to spend more time with, and give my children the opportunity to know; jobs are abundant in that area - at least for my husbands line of work.

I have contacted my ex-husband and asked him if he would fight me if I do decide to make this move. He said he wouldn't. Being that our children are older teens (15 and 17), I gave them the option of staying with their father or moving with me. I felt it was only right to allow them to choose, as they do have such a great relationship with their father, and he is a wonderful father and more than able to care for them. Both children thought about it, and both have said that they want to make the move with me, if I do make the move.

I thought this was all going to work out wonderfully. But then I spoke with my former sister-in-law, who gave me the heads up that my ex-husband is considering fighting me on the move after all.

There are other issues to this move, the biggest being that our 15 year old has starting running with the wrong crowd, and got into some legal trouble earlier this year - and I would love to get her out of this town and away from the crowd she is in with. If she decides to stay with her father, he lives in a different town, so either way she would be in a position to make new friends, hopefully better than the ones she has now. The other issues are small, and could be easily dealt with.

Other than my husbands health and the job opportunity, there isn't a significant change in circumstances that would warrant a judge giving custody to my ex-husband, but I wonder if a judge would restrict this move.

Does anyone have any experience with a situation such as this? With the children being the ages they are, and both desiring to make this move with me, would a judge likely take that into consideration?

Thanks in advance for any advice/input on my situation.What is the name of your state?

 

[fairisfair]

why, in the world, after all this time of being able to work things out with your ex husband would you start listening to someone else's gossip?? Have you discussed it again with bio dad???

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Unles you are planning to move to parts of Eastern Oergon, Oregon in MORE humid than OHIO, that being said, be sure to follow the terms of your orders re notificaiton of CP move, this is usualy a notificaton and revised parenting plan sent by CRRR so many days in advance of the move or earliest possibility. You could write the notice in include, "as per out discussion of our impending move on mo/dd/yr we agreed to the following....." Be sure to address the proposed changes in visitation, remembering that you will be responsibile for the cost of transportaiton since you will be creating the distance, child support, college is applicible, be sure to show how it will be in the children's best interest, before you list your personal reasons. Be sure to include that you were open to him having custody of 1 or both if the children desired and he agreed to them having a choice and the children have expressed their wishes." If he contests he can file in court to modify your agreements or you can submit your stipulatd agreement to the court re the agreed changes for them to become orders. If you fail to notify him in writing as per your agreement ot statute, he can block the children's move, but not yours.

The move will be hard on both children and the issues that caused your daughter to run with the wrong crowd will likely surface even in a new environment.

 

[Halls]

I agree with fair. If you get along with your ex and have been able to communicate and coparent together nicely all this time just cal him up and tell him whatyou were told and ask him for the truth. Than you'll know for sure. Heck, he could have been talking smack and not being serious about trying to stop you from the move.

My advice, never worry about something until it has happend. IN other words he told you that you could move. If everything is a go than moveand unless you get served to try and prevent your move than you have nothing to worry about.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

I agree with fair. If you get along with your ex and have been able to communicate and coparent together nicely all this time just cal him up and tell him whatyou were told and ask him for the truth. Than you'll know for sure. Heck, he could have been talking smack and not being serious about trying to stop you from the move.

My advice, never worry about something until it has happend. IN other words he told you that you could move. If everything is a go than moveand unless you get served to try and prevent your move than you have nothing to worry about.

The point you and Fair are missing is the advice re the question. If OP doesn't give appropriate written notice allowing for service and NCP's response per their orders or statute, all the verbal agreements in the world won't hold up in court. This move will require major revisions to their current agreements, neither of you addressed that.

 

[Ohiogal]

In Ohio the CP must do the following:

ORC 3109.051

(G) (1) If the residential parent intends to move to a residence other than the residence specified in the parenting time order or decree of the court, the parent shall file a notice of intent to relocate with the court that issued the order or decree. Except as provided in divisions (G)(2), (3), and (4) of this section, the court shall send a copy of the notice to the parent who is not the residential parent. Upon receipt of the notice, the court, on its own motion or the motion of the parent who is not the residential parent, may schedule a hearing with notice to both parents to determine whether it is in the best interest of the child to revise the parenting time schedule for the child.

Also NEITHER PARENT is allowed to elicit a statement from the minor children to determine what parent the children want to live with. Doing so violates the law.

ORC 3109.051(2)(C)
No person shall obtain or attempt to obtain from a child a written or recorded statement or affidavit setting forth the wishes and concerns of the child regarding those parenting time or visitation matters. A court, in considering the factors listed in division (D) of this section for purposes of determining whether to grant any parenting time or visitation rights, establishing a parenting time or visitation schedule, determining other parenting time matters under this section or section 3109.12 of the Revised Code or visitation matters under this section or under section 3109.11 or 3109.12 of the Revised Code, or resolving any issues related to the making of any determination with respect to parenting time or visitation rights or the establishment of any specific parenting time or visitation schedule, shall not accept or consider a written or recorded statement or affidavit that purports to set forth the child's wishes or concerns regarding those parenting time or visitation matters.

 

[Halls]

no, that isn't what I'm missing. I never said mom still shouldn't go by her court order and not inform the court she is moving. Yes, mom needs to follow the court order on moving, but she got approval from her ex that she could move. All I'm saying is that if she is doubting his words now because of what the ex's sister is telling her than she needs to go and talk to her ex again before she moves.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

In Ohio the CP must do the following:

ORC 3109.051

(G) (1) If the residential parent intends to move to a residence other than the residence specified in the parenting time order or decree of the court, the parent shall file a notice of intent to relocate with the court that issued the order or decree. Except as provided in divisions (G)(2), (3), and (4) of this section, the court shall send a copy of the notice to the parent who is not the residential parent. Upon receipt of the notice, the court, on its own motion or the motion of the parent who is not the residential parent, may schedule a hearing with notice to both parents to determine whether it is in the best interest of the child to revise the parenting time schedule for the child.

Also NEITHER PARENT is allowed to elicit a statement from the minor children to determine what parent the children want to live with. Doing so violates the law.

ORC 3109.051(2)(C)
No person shall obtain or attempt to obtain from a child a written or recorded statement or affidavit setting forth the wishes and concerns of the child regarding those parenting time or visitation matters. A court, in considering the factors listed in division (D) of this section for purposes of determining whether to grant any parenting time or visitation rights, establishing a parenting time or visitation schedule, determining other parenting time matters under this section or section 3109.12 of the Revised Code or visitation matters under this section or under section 3109.11 or 3109.12 of the Revised Code, or resolving any issues related to the making of any determination with respect to parenting time or visitation rights or the establishment of any specific parenting time or visitation schedule, shall not accept or consider a written or recorded statement or affidavit that purports to set forth the child's wishes or concerns regarding those parenting time or visitation matters.

Thank you for posting the statutes This is very good as it requires notice to the court.

OT
take a look at this case in GA re a Muni Court Judge Jon Philip Carr http://www.wmaz.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=27387&provider=top

 

[rmet4nzkx]

no, that isn't what I'm missing. I never said mom still shouldn't go by her court order and not inform the court she is moving. Yes, mom needs to follow the court order on moving, but she got approval from her ex that she could move. All I'm saying is that if she is doubting his words now because of what the ex's sister is telling her than she needs to go and talk to her ex again before she moves.

NO she needs to notify the court and they will notify him and calendar a hearing if needed, she doesn't need to further complicate matters or involve the children. It is ok that she and her ex have discussed the matter, it is irrelevant what SIL says if she doesn't notify the courts.

 

[mom6stepmom2]

Unles you are planning to move to parts of Eastern Oergon, Oregon in MORE humid than OHIO,

Southern Oregon is a very dry climate. Eugene down to California rains very little compared to northeastern Oregon. It's been 107 where I am. Very Very Very hot dry summers.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Southern Oregon is a very dry climate. Eugene down to California rains very little compared to northeastern Oregon. It's been 107 where I am. Very Very Very hot dry summers.

Yes it will make a big difference whether they move to Bend or Portland. And from the looks of all the moss on the roofs in Eugene it is pretty wet there too even east to McKinsey Bridge is wet.

 

[mom6stepmom2]

Yes it will make a big difference whether they move to Bend or Portland. And from the looks of all the moss on the roofs in Eugene it is pretty wet there too even east to McKinsey Bridge is wet.

Silly me, I meant to say northwestern Oregon is very wet. Not northeastern. But yes, Eugene does get it's share of the rain. But you start going south from there and it gets less wet by the mile.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Silly me, I meant to say northwestern Oregon is very wet. Not northeastern. But yes, Eugene does get it's share of the rain. But you start going south from there and it gets less wet by the mile.

The larger population centers in Oregon are wet so there would be less work opportunities in the less populated "dry" areas of OR. Somehow I think it is more about being near her family than moving for job opportunities and husband's health. THings that will have to be effectively argued if there is any contest.

 

[jessi perez]

no more rain

Silly me, I meant to say northwestern Oregon is very wet. Not northeastern. But yes, Eugene does get it's share of the rain. But you start going south from there and it gets less wet by the mile.

thanks a lot for sending us all that blankety blank blank rain the last few days

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

thanks a lot for sending us all that blankety blank blank rain the last few days

Trailer tires stuck in the mud Kelly?