cappadocia
Member
Yesterday, 10:12 AM
HastingsFamily
Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Hampton, Virginia
Posts: 16
An Ex Causing Problems
________________________________________
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia
To start off I would like to thank anyone who reads this and gives advice. My fiancée and I are going through quite a big ordeal when it comes to her Ex-husband. I really don't know where to start, so here we go.
My name is Kyle and I am engaged to a lovely woman named Erin.
My fiancée and I meet 10 months ago and it was like meeting my soul mate, I haven't been happier. She has two wonderful children from her marriage before me. I was so scared that the kids wouldn't like me, but they do and I love them with all my heart. She is a stay at home mom while I am in the Navy she is trying to get as much school done for her degree. Now comes the not so wonderful part of the story... We decided for me to move in with her, that it would be better for everyone because I could provide her and the children with ample financial support. Everything was going fine until her Ex started problems. I was living with her and the children in her house that her and her Ex own. He didn't like the fact that I was living with what used to be his family. He cheated on her and moved out, in other words threw them in the trash. She never asked him for money or anything of that nature, just to be left alone. But he, being the coward that he is served her with court papers (stating that she was only with me for my money). She went through court and the court granted her child support and spousal support. But during all of this I moved out to make it a little easier. Now, my soon to be wife and I and the children live together in a great apartment and everything was going good, so we thought, yet again her Ex stepped in and said that he was going to take the kids away because she was co- habitating with me. They have a separation agreement draw up and it states that he can live as if a unmarried man and she can live as a single female. Now, to me that means that she can do what she wants with whom she wants, and I understand that it's not fair to the children to have different men coming and going, but I have been around for 10 months and I do not plan to go anywhere as we plan to be wed at the end of June. As I stated with live together in an apartment, both of our names are on the lease. He is now taking her to court because he states that I am an "over night guest of the opposite sex", now how on Earth can I be a guest if my name is on the lease? Does anyone have any ideas that we might be able to use? Also, he is a month late on his court ordered spousal support, can we use that against him? Thanks very much, if anyone needs more info, ask and I will fill in. Sorry if this is long or hard to read and understand I am very upset because of this and just need some help.
Thanks again,
Kyle and Erin
#2
Yesterday, 10:33 AM
Isis1
Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 14,556
Well, to be perfectly honest it's best the mother of the children pull out her court order, create her own handle and ask her own questions so we can help her.
Like it or not, legally the ONLY thing you can do is move out before the wedding and wait till then. It would make things so much easier on mom and the kids.
#3
Yesterday, 11:22 AM
HastingsFamily
Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Hampton, Virginia
Posts: 16
Even though my name is only the lease and her separation agreement states she can live as if a single female? Thats makes no sense to me what so ever. And as for her needing to ask the questions? She was with me while I wrote that. So no she doesnt need to make a handle, I asked and had her read over everything, and this is a question about what I can do as well.
And again how is that the ONLY thing I can do, if my name is on the lease which is a legal contract.
And as far as making it easier on mom and the kids. I do not see how that would make it easier if I took my money that we use to pay the rent and bills as well as for the kids and she didn't have that money anymore. Not to mention that the kids do love me as if I am their dad and I love them just the same if not more. So how would me moving out make it easier on them? Try having a four year old look at you and ask why? Like she did anything wrong.
And also, her attorney told her and I to wait until after her separation agreement to be sign, which we did.
________________________________________
Last edited by HastingsFamily; Yesterday at 11:31 AM.
#4
Yesterday, 11:31 AM
Proserpina
Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Weigh a pie
Posts: 19,504
Quote:
Originally Posted by HastingsFamily
Even though my name is only the lease and her separation agreement states she can live as if a single female? Thats makes no sense to me what so ever. And as for her needing to ask the questions? She was with me while I wrote that. So no she doesnt need to make a handle, I asked and had her read over everything, and this is a question about what I can do as well.
And again how is that the ONLY thing I can do, if my name is on the lease which is a legal contract.
Because your lease is absolutely meaningless in family court.
And yes, she really should get an account for herself.
She's also free to seek advice from a local attorney who will no doubt guide her further as to how the courts will view cohabitation in this situation.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
HastingsFamily
Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Hampton, Virginia
Posts: 16
An Ex Causing Problems
________________________________________
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia
To start off I would like to thank anyone who reads this and gives advice. My fiancée and I are going through quite a big ordeal when it comes to her Ex-husband. I really don't know where to start, so here we go.
My name is Kyle and I am engaged to a lovely woman named Erin.
My fiancée and I meet 10 months ago and it was like meeting my soul mate, I haven't been happier. She has two wonderful children from her marriage before me. I was so scared that the kids wouldn't like me, but they do and I love them with all my heart. She is a stay at home mom while I am in the Navy she is trying to get as much school done for her degree. Now comes the not so wonderful part of the story... We decided for me to move in with her, that it would be better for everyone because I could provide her and the children with ample financial support. Everything was going fine until her Ex started problems. I was living with her and the children in her house that her and her Ex own. He didn't like the fact that I was living with what used to be his family. He cheated on her and moved out, in other words threw them in the trash. She never asked him for money or anything of that nature, just to be left alone. But he, being the coward that he is served her with court papers (stating that she was only with me for my money). She went through court and the court granted her child support and spousal support. But during all of this I moved out to make it a little easier. Now, my soon to be wife and I and the children live together in a great apartment and everything was going good, so we thought, yet again her Ex stepped in and said that he was going to take the kids away because she was co- habitating with me. They have a separation agreement draw up and it states that he can live as if a unmarried man and she can live as a single female. Now, to me that means that she can do what she wants with whom she wants, and I understand that it's not fair to the children to have different men coming and going, but I have been around for 10 months and I do not plan to go anywhere as we plan to be wed at the end of June. As I stated with live together in an apartment, both of our names are on the lease. He is now taking her to court because he states that I am an "over night guest of the opposite sex", now how on Earth can I be a guest if my name is on the lease? Does anyone have any ideas that we might be able to use? Also, he is a month late on his court ordered spousal support, can we use that against him? Thanks very much, if anyone needs more info, ask and I will fill in. Sorry if this is long or hard to read and understand I am very upset because of this and just need some help.
Thanks again,
Kyle and Erin
#2
Yesterday, 10:33 AM
Isis1
Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 14,556
Well, to be perfectly honest it's best the mother of the children pull out her court order, create her own handle and ask her own questions so we can help her.
Like it or not, legally the ONLY thing you can do is move out before the wedding and wait till then. It would make things so much easier on mom and the kids.
#3
Yesterday, 11:22 AM
HastingsFamily
Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Hampton, Virginia
Posts: 16
Even though my name is only the lease and her separation agreement states she can live as if a single female? Thats makes no sense to me what so ever. And as for her needing to ask the questions? She was with me while I wrote that. So no she doesnt need to make a handle, I asked and had her read over everything, and this is a question about what I can do as well.
And again how is that the ONLY thing I can do, if my name is on the lease which is a legal contract.
And as far as making it easier on mom and the kids. I do not see how that would make it easier if I took my money that we use to pay the rent and bills as well as for the kids and she didn't have that money anymore. Not to mention that the kids do love me as if I am their dad and I love them just the same if not more. So how would me moving out make it easier on them? Try having a four year old look at you and ask why? Like she did anything wrong.
And also, her attorney told her and I to wait until after her separation agreement to be sign, which we did.
________________________________________
Last edited by HastingsFamily; Yesterday at 11:31 AM.
#4
Yesterday, 11:31 AM
Proserpina
Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Weigh a pie
Posts: 19,504
Quote:
Originally Posted by HastingsFamily
Even though my name is only the lease and her separation agreement states she can live as if a single female? Thats makes no sense to me what so ever. And as for her needing to ask the questions? She was with me while I wrote that. So no she doesnt need to make a handle, I asked and had her read over everything, and this is a question about what I can do as well.
And again how is that the ONLY thing I can do, if my name is on the lease which is a legal contract.
Because your lease is absolutely meaningless in family court.
And yes, she really should get an account for herself.
She's also free to seek advice from a local attorney who will no doubt guide her further as to how the courts will view cohabitation in this situation.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?