cappadocia
Member
benjamin7062
Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 3
Getting My Son Home
________________________________________
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
Back Story:
Dating a girl. We get pregnant. She and I got married to get her on my insurance. I also wanted to make sure my son would be covered without an issue. I very much did not want to be married but here we are -- proceeding with a divorce. (I accept full responsibility for the consequences)
Total length of marriage: 11 months.
During the year of marriage we have been unable to work together on things. Our new child (four months old) is no different. It is not that we are hostile towards each other. She is an excellent mother and really good person. We simply do not agree on *anything*. We do not necessarily fight and scream at each other. But, we also do not agree on *anything* (toothpaste, towel colors, how to raise our child, etc).
My wife does not want the divorce. I want the divorce.
We do not have any violence or hostility in our relationship. We have been civil but I sense the hostility looming as the pain in my wife turns to anger.
Scenario:
We recently purchased an RV. We were traveling across the US to visit her mom. During this trip things were not going well between us. It was clear we needed to separate. Many things were tossed around about how to accomplish this. She could stay with her mom, I could stay away for a while, etc. In the mean time it was agreed that she was going to continue her visit with her mom through her mother's 60th birthday (two weeks). I had to come home for work for an emergency.
I get home. After the five day drive home I felt it was best to proceed with the divorce. After explaining this to my wife she got really upset and hostile.
Her mother is a very expensive and wealth attorney in Philadelphia. While she does not have juristiction in Texas she still knows her way around a court room. Thus, my wife will have an infinite supply of money and legal resources.
I explain this about her mother because instantly my wife has stopped all communication with me. I'm starting to wonder if she is being advised and why? When my wife started getting hostile I started recording the conversation. She has a way of taking things out of context. I was afraid they would some how twist things around against me. I kept asking her very direct questions:
At first she acted like she couldn't hear me so I switched phones. Then:
Q: ".. I would like (our son) returned to his home.. when will he return?.."
A: ".. I hear you.. but I don't know.."
Q: ".. When will you have an answer.."
A: ".. I don't know.."
[rinse/repeat several times]
Finally, I said I don't know what my legal options are and I guess I will have to pursue an attorney or law enforcement. Ultimately, I just don't know what to do.
I've asked that she get back with me by Monday.
Every second of every day I feel I can't stop thinking about my son. I'm very fearful that my wife's mother (attorney) will know some way to prolong this long enough that they claim residency in Philadelphia and severely limit my ability to visit and see my son.
I know fathers have no rights. I've accepted this. My son needs his mother for the first two years. We've both agreed it is best for him to breast feed and both do not want him on formula or a bottle. I asked for joint custody at the age of 3 and she flipped out. It seems the idea of me having any custody is unreasonable. She stopped communicating from that point forward.
My Questions:
• How do I get my son home?
• How do I insure that she can't move from our home state (Texas) and take him out-of-my-reach?
• Is there anything her mother can do (in Philadelphia) that will stop me from being able keep him close to home?
• Since I drove her to her mom's and knew she was going to visit - did I give up my rights to have my son home?
I've started contacting attorneys but I'm starting worry that I'm waiting too long
I'm so scared I'm going to lose him for trying to be the 'nice guy'. I feel like she is holding him hostage and not willing to come home to spite me. I will never forgive her for holding him from me. I would *never* do that to her. She is blinded by emotions and not thinking about *him*.
#2
Today, 04:45 PM
WittyUserName
Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,129
For those who might be considering answering, OP has apparently decided this forum is too hostile.
https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-support-98/way-make-sure-all-money-benefit-my-son-546635.html
#3
Today, 04:56 PM
CJane
Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 15,481
Interesting that you drove her a 5 day trip across the country in an RV, had an "emergency" at work that could simmer for another 5 days while you drove home, and immediately upon your return decided you needed a divorce and kiddo needed returned to TX.
After all, when you ditched your wife and child on the other end of the country, the plan was for them to stay at least 2 weeks.
Law enforcement will not get involved. Especially after you tell them that you drove mom and kiddo to PA, and then took the RV and left them there so you could handle an 'emergency'.
Is Mom just supposed to be at your beck and call? "Stay here. We'll separate. No, wait, I want a divorce, come home."
Or "We don't agree on anything about raising a child. No. Wait. We agree that he should be breast fed and never receive a bottle or formula. And that he should be with Mom til he's two."
Seriously? You're divorcing over different tastes in toothpaste. For real.
#4
Today, 05:17 PM
stealth2
Senior Member Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 36,116
That's about what I got out of the story, CJane.
#5
Today, 07:03 PM
gr8rn
Member Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 887
Wow. You really think you get to call ALL the shots, don't you? Why should Mom return to Texas after you ceremoniously dumped her at Grandma esquires doorstep? What an idiot.
#6
Today, 07:52 PM
cappadocia
Member Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 48
After reading both threads, this guy is coming across as a giant control-freak. Ugh.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Junior Member Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 3
Getting My Son Home
________________________________________
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
Back Story:
Dating a girl. We get pregnant. She and I got married to get her on my insurance. I also wanted to make sure my son would be covered without an issue. I very much did not want to be married but here we are -- proceeding with a divorce. (I accept full responsibility for the consequences)
Total length of marriage: 11 months.
During the year of marriage we have been unable to work together on things. Our new child (four months old) is no different. It is not that we are hostile towards each other. She is an excellent mother and really good person. We simply do not agree on *anything*. We do not necessarily fight and scream at each other. But, we also do not agree on *anything* (toothpaste, towel colors, how to raise our child, etc).
My wife does not want the divorce. I want the divorce.
We do not have any violence or hostility in our relationship. We have been civil but I sense the hostility looming as the pain in my wife turns to anger.
Scenario:
We recently purchased an RV. We were traveling across the US to visit her mom. During this trip things were not going well between us. It was clear we needed to separate. Many things were tossed around about how to accomplish this. She could stay with her mom, I could stay away for a while, etc. In the mean time it was agreed that she was going to continue her visit with her mom through her mother's 60th birthday (two weeks). I had to come home for work for an emergency.
I get home. After the five day drive home I felt it was best to proceed with the divorce. After explaining this to my wife she got really upset and hostile.
Her mother is a very expensive and wealth attorney in Philadelphia. While she does not have juristiction in Texas she still knows her way around a court room. Thus, my wife will have an infinite supply of money and legal resources.
I explain this about her mother because instantly my wife has stopped all communication with me. I'm starting to wonder if she is being advised and why? When my wife started getting hostile I started recording the conversation. She has a way of taking things out of context. I was afraid they would some how twist things around against me. I kept asking her very direct questions:
At first she acted like she couldn't hear me so I switched phones. Then:
Q: ".. I would like (our son) returned to his home.. when will he return?.."
A: ".. I hear you.. but I don't know.."
Q: ".. When will you have an answer.."
A: ".. I don't know.."
[rinse/repeat several times]
Finally, I said I don't know what my legal options are and I guess I will have to pursue an attorney or law enforcement. Ultimately, I just don't know what to do.
I've asked that she get back with me by Monday.
Every second of every day I feel I can't stop thinking about my son. I'm very fearful that my wife's mother (attorney) will know some way to prolong this long enough that they claim residency in Philadelphia and severely limit my ability to visit and see my son.
I know fathers have no rights. I've accepted this. My son needs his mother for the first two years. We've both agreed it is best for him to breast feed and both do not want him on formula or a bottle. I asked for joint custody at the age of 3 and she flipped out. It seems the idea of me having any custody is unreasonable. She stopped communicating from that point forward.
My Questions:
• How do I get my son home?
• How do I insure that she can't move from our home state (Texas) and take him out-of-my-reach?
• Is there anything her mother can do (in Philadelphia) that will stop me from being able keep him close to home?
• Since I drove her to her mom's and knew she was going to visit - did I give up my rights to have my son home?
I've started contacting attorneys but I'm starting worry that I'm waiting too long
I'm so scared I'm going to lose him for trying to be the 'nice guy'. I feel like she is holding him hostage and not willing to come home to spite me. I will never forgive her for holding him from me. I would *never* do that to her. She is blinded by emotions and not thinking about *him*.
#2
Today, 04:45 PM
WittyUserName
Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,129
For those who might be considering answering, OP has apparently decided this forum is too hostile.
https://forum.freeadvice.com/child-support-98/way-make-sure-all-money-benefit-my-son-546635.html
#3
Today, 04:56 PM
CJane
Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Kansas City
Posts: 15,481
Interesting that you drove her a 5 day trip across the country in an RV, had an "emergency" at work that could simmer for another 5 days while you drove home, and immediately upon your return decided you needed a divorce and kiddo needed returned to TX.
After all, when you ditched your wife and child on the other end of the country, the plan was for them to stay at least 2 weeks.
Law enforcement will not get involved. Especially after you tell them that you drove mom and kiddo to PA, and then took the RV and left them there so you could handle an 'emergency'.
Is Mom just supposed to be at your beck and call? "Stay here. We'll separate. No, wait, I want a divorce, come home."
Or "We don't agree on anything about raising a child. No. Wait. We agree that he should be breast fed and never receive a bottle or formula. And that he should be with Mom til he's two."
Seriously? You're divorcing over different tastes in toothpaste. For real.
#4
Today, 05:17 PM
stealth2
Senior Member Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 36,116
That's about what I got out of the story, CJane.
#5
Today, 07:03 PM
gr8rn
Member Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 887
Wow. You really think you get to call ALL the shots, don't you? Why should Mom return to Texas after you ceremoniously dumped her at Grandma esquires doorstep? What an idiot.
#6
Today, 07:52 PM
cappadocia
Member Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 48
After reading both threads, this guy is coming across as a giant control-freak. Ugh.What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?