Desperately need advice!!

[casa]

Ya know, first of all, I could care less about YOUR opinion of me. You don't know me, just like the judges who make unjust decisions that don't know the individual person that gets the raw deal. Society has taught us to believe that FATHERS are not adequate enough to raise their children by themselves because SOCIETY as a whole has the mentality of a "rock". Most can't think for themselves and need other people to run their lives for them. I DON'T. Just for instance, if I was put in front of a woman judge who had a man put her through the mill in her own personal situation..I would be a sitting duck just because I am a man. If I was put in front of a male judge who's sister was taken through the mud by her ex, I would again ....be a sitting duck, because I'm a man. Women and men alike label the opposite sex based on personal experiences....judges and attorneys are no different. Someone's quote on here is "If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your thing". HAAAAAAA, ADVICE FORUM??? I was always taught if at first you don't succeed, TRY AGAIN, but just like so many in this forum were asking me to GIVE UP, I refused and look what it got me. You can think of me what you want but the TRUTH IS, Regardless of how good or bad of a parent I am...IN YOUR EYES, THE CHILDRENS OWN MOTHER, you know, the one who is considered the "BEST" parent by society, is the one who RELINQUISHED HER RIGHTS WITH NO FIGHTING ON MY PART. She just knows I am one with convictions and I don't and won't lie under a rock for NOBODY if my beliefs are strong enough to argue. Do I always have to be right? No , I don't and am not afraid to admit when I'm wrong which I have done on many occasions, but with every breath in my body I would debate you on WHO IS THE BETTER PARENT HERE and regardless of how much LAW KNOWLEDGE YOU HAVE, I would win. The reason you find it so hard to believe that I am a good father is because you yourself as a parent probably suck or you don't even have children. Or........I am not a good father to you because you, high and mighty lawman/woman gave pisspoor advice and can't admit to that. Go ahead, keep telling the guys to give up in fighting for the children they TRULY love and be part of the MANY who will run the children in society in the ground as a result.Maybe then you can add your name to the list of many who are RESPONSIBLE for the outcome of the children who followed their drug addicted, alcoholic, partying mamas footseps. Something to be REAL PROUD OF HUH? Everyone wants to say that children do this and do that because they were "raised around it" but yet lifestyles don't play a part in deciding what is in "the best interest of the child". Regardless of how "trashy" I talk, my children are not watching me TYPE this and I certainly don't cuss in front of them ...........and certainly wouldn't BRAG about it if I did....like some here have. Ya know, I somehow knew that YOU would be the one to POST a negative reply to my outcome.....simply because I didn't BOW DOWN to your advice from the get-go, and pity any who do. Sure laws are laws but laws can be changed if enough people would get a backbone and make it happen instead of just thinkin, " Hmmmmm, so thats the norm". Thats what you call a "dictatorship" My constitutional rights in this country have taken me a long way and you nor anyone else will get me to "roll over" and look the other way just because it has "worked" for so many others NOT like me. I take great pride in being a parent and taking your ill advice would have went against everything I stand for where parenting is concerned so go find someone else with a similar situation.paint him up with rosy cheeks, lipstick , a fat red nose and a goofy hat and see if he will take your advice. He'd have to be a clown.....just so happens , I'm not. And you do this for a living? It would be wonderful to go back and see the results of past advice you have given. I live by the saying "YOUR LIFE SITUATION IS A RESULT OF DECISIONS YOU HAVE MADE IN YOUR LIFE" If advice you are given does not seem like it is good advice..Don't take it, because most times, it's not.

I know many custodial fathers. This issue wasn't Mothers vs. Fathers. You were dealing with an unfit Mother~ but just as many deal with unfit Fathers. Your stereotypes scream hypocrisy, as you rail against ones you perceive...yet throw your own all over the place at the same time.

You were given advice on what IS and what is NOT considered "evidence" &/or "proof" in order to win your case. Instead of listening you crawled up on a tangential soapbox and became irate when others didn't join you.

You are not getting custody because you 'won' according to your holier than thou beliefs~ you are getting custody because the Mother is relinquishing it, voluntarily. I do believe if a parent is willing to give up custody- then it's best they do...children need commited parents. However, even though you may be the 'more fit' parent in this equation~ you'd do your daughters well to keep your Narcissism & Judgements in check. Otherwise, your little girls will grow up and attach themselves to men who look down on them- and whom they'll never please or be appreciated by.

 

[singledaddytwo]

Casa Wrote:

Hmmm...did you notice you just admitted to letting the young man sleep over with your daugher while YOU were watching them? And you obviously weren't supervising your 11 yr. old if she's sneaking into bedrooms taking pictures of her teenage sister and her boyfriend.

If you really did not agree (rather than just looking for things to use against the Mother)...then why didn't you kick the young man's behind out the door? Then tell your 11 yr old to brush her teeth and go to bed?


Response: MORE MEN BASHING I SEE!!!
First of all, if you would read all the posts, you would see where the 16 yr old is hers from a "PREVIOUS MARRIAGE"..you know, NOT MINE? Secondly, I was watching the girls in their MOTHERS HOUSE, you know, NOT MINE?? The sixteen yr old and bf was there when I got there with mother there too. Did she not know they were there? Highly doubtful!! I had NO RIGHT to kick the bf out because it was the mothers house, the mothers daughter and the mothers "accepted lifestyle" for HER CHILD..NOT MINE!!

My daughter who took the picture was 11 yrs old at the time. Now let me ask you? DO YOU AS A MOTHER /FATHER FOLLOW YOUR 11YR OLD CHILDREN FROM ROOM TO ROOM AT YOUR HOUSE LIKE A LEECH OR KNOW ANYONE WHO DOES ? If so, that is like holding them prisoner. She went upstairs to the bathroom while I was downstairs watching my 3 yr old at the time, peeked in the bedroom to ask the 16 yr old a question, saw what she saw, got her camera, took the picture, brought it to daddy and said " Dad look, _______ is in bed with _______ and they don't have shirts on. ALL IN 5 MINUTES!!! Being that it was only 8:00PM on a Saturday night, I didn't feel it was BEDTIME. Thank you very much. I DID NOTHING ILLEGAL.........BUT, I'm a man, so just for that reason...I'M WRONG. GET A CLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Again society automatically assumes the worst of fathers but the mothers get all the glory even though SOME of the mothers getting the glory I wouldn't trust to care for my dog.

 

[casa]

Hmmm...did you notice you just admitted to letting the young man sleep over with your daugher while YOU were watching them? And you obviously weren't supervising your 11 yr. old if she's sneaking into bedrooms taking pictures of her teenage sister and her boyfriend.

If you really did not agree (rather than just looking for things to use against the Mother)...then why didn't you kick the young man's behind out the door? Then tell your 11 yr old to brush her teeth and go to bed?


Response: MORE MEN BASHING I SEE!!!
First of all, if you would read all the posts, you would see where the 16 yr old is hers from a "PREVIOUS MARRIAGE"..you know, NOT MINE? Secondly, I was watching the girls in their MOTHERS HOUSE, you know, NOT MINE?? The sixteen yr old and bf was there when I got there with mother there too. Did she not know they were there? Highly doubtful!! I had NO RIGHT to kick the bf out because it was the mothers house, the mothers daughter and the mothers "accepted lifestyle" for HER CHILD..NOT MINE!!

My daughter who took the picture was 11 yrs old at the time. Now let me ask you? DO YOU AS A MOTHER /FATHER FOLLOW YOUR 11YR OLD CHILDREN FROM ROOM TO ROOM AT YOUR HOUSE LIKE A LEECH OR KNOW ANYONE WHO DOES ? If so, that is like holding them prisoner. She went upstairs to the bathroom while I was downstairs watching my 3 yr old at the time, peeked in the bedroom to ask the 16 yr old a question, saw what she saw, got her camera, took the picture, brought it to daddy and said " Dad look, _______ is in bed with _______ and they don't have shirts on. ALL IN 5 MINUTES!!! Being that it was only 8:00PM on a Saturday night, I didn't feel it was BEDTIME. Thank you very much. I DID NOTHING ILLEGAL.........BUT, I'm a man, so just for that reason...I'M WRONG. GET A CLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Again society automatically assumes the worst of fathers but the mothers get all the glory even though SOME of the mothers getting the glory I wouldn't trust to care for my dog.

Actually, I most often accused of Women bashing on this site...most people tend to think I'm a man. LOL In fact I helped a father win custody of his children just last year.

There is no sexism in my advice.

If the 16 yr old wasn't your child~ Then why would you hang your hopes on a custody change, on the actions of a child that is not yours?

Also, YOU were in charge of watching the children...so YES you do have the right to put a stop to what you deem "illegal activity". If they were doing drugs, or commiting violence~ Would you say "well, gee, not my house"??

The more you debate, the more transparent you are.

 

[BL]

Casa , He has no clue .

The best thing this forum can do is ignore this one .

He comes here asking for advice , and instead TELLS us All .

There is no help . He don't get it .

I will clap my hands in applause for your reply to him though . Very well put .

As I stated Long ago , By example they will learn , and IMO , they children will grow Just as you Stated .

Poor Rich Kids .....

I always wondered why some rich folks were never Happy , now I know why .

 

[stealth2]

I also know a lot of custodial fathers. And if you took the time to read the boards, you'd see that most of those who responded to you are actually very evenhanded when it comes to Mom vs Dad, and do not bash one or the other gender.

As casa stated, a lot of what you were claiming would win you custody would very likely not be admitted as evidence. It's good that you managed to sort things out w/o going to court, because that would have been a whole different kettle of fish - one which you would have had no guarantee of winning.

And when your kids turn out as great as mine have, then you can come and tell me what a better job you've done raising yours, m-kay?

 

[singledaddytwo]

CASA WROTE:
You are not getting custody because you 'won' according to your holier than thou beliefs~ you are getting custody because the Mother is relinquishing it, voluntarily. I do believe if a parent is willing to give up custody- then it's best they do...children need commited parents. However, even though you may be the 'more fit' parent in this equation~ you'd do your daughters well to keep your Narcissism & Judgements in check. Otherwise, your little girls will grow up and attach themselves to men who look down on them- and whom they'll never please or be appreciated by.

YES, she relinquished her rights to the children and if she didn't, what all these posts tell me is that the children would have been FORCED to suffer with a woman who TRULY didn't want them by the SYSTEMS RULES. That is a system that needs changed in the worst way.

As for how I raise my children, I'm raising them HOW I SEE FIT and seeing how I am 37 yrs old, never been in jail , only received 3 traffic tickets in 21 years, have never been in a physical fight, have never hurt anyone, I would say that my "way of doing things" is a way I would like them to follow. But most importantly I am teaching them to stand up for what they believe is RIGHT!!! Something most people can't do.....but worse yet, won't do.

Maybe I would have lost my azz had I been forced to resolve this in a courtroom in "todays world" but does that mean you drop it just because the courts say so? To some, that answer is YES but to me, it's NOT A CHANCE!!

 

[casa]

Also, my 11 yr old knows to knock before entering someone's room (common courtesy)...and she certainly would know better than to invade someone's privacy by photographing them in bed.

 

[casa]

CASA WROTE:
You are not getting custody because you 'won' according to your holier than thou beliefs~ you are getting custody because the Mother is relinquishing it, voluntarily. I do believe if a parent is willing to give up custody- then it's best they do...children need commited parents. However, even though you may be the 'more fit' parent in this equation~ you'd do your daughters well to keep your Narcissism & Judgements in check. Otherwise, your little girls will grow up and attach themselves to men who look down on them- and whom they'll never please or be appreciated by.

YES, she relinquished her rights to the children and if she didn't, what all these posts tell me is that the children would have been FORCED to suffer with a woman who TRULY didn't want them by the SYSTEMS RULES. That is a system that needs changed in the worst way.

As for how I raise my children, I'm raising them HOW I SEE FIT and seeing how I am 37 yrs old, never been in jail , only received 3 traffic tickets in 21 years, have never been in a physical fight, have never hurt anyone, I would say that my "way of doing things" is a way I would like them to follow. But most importantly I am teaching them to stand up for what they believe is RIGHT!!! Something most people can't do.....but worse yet, won't do.

Maybe I would have lost my azz had I been forced to resolve this in a courtroom in "todays world" but does that mean you drop it just because the courts say so? To some, that answer is YES but to me, it's NOT A CHANCE!!

Absolutely not...I'd have encouraged you to request a GAL or a Forensic Evaluation, in order for a professional to determine the effects of the environment on the children- and what custody arrangement would be in their best interests. I would not, however, encourage you to waste your time/energy on inadmissable evidence or evidence obtained in such a way, that it would be detrimental to your case. The system isn't useless~ but parents need to abide by the laws of the system and work through/with it to get the outcome they want...not just bash it, fight it and try to find ways around it. Your diatribe did nothing but make you sound whiny - as you attempted to justify your own perceptions about Injustice.

 

[singledaddytwo]

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL........TOO FUNNY TO COMPREHEND>

WOOOOHOOO, now we are not only "LAW ADVISOR SPECIALISTS" BUT ALSO "FAMILY COUNSELING SPECIALISTS"???

NOW I SEE, JACK OF ALL TRADES, MASTER OF ABSOLUTELY NONEEEEEEE!!

SEE YOU ALL LATERRRRRRRRR!!

I THINK I'M THE ONLY ONE WITH A CLUE IN THIS FORUM AND YOU CLOWNS ARE TRYING TO BRAINWASH ME INTO YOUR LAME WAY OF THINKING. SORRY, BUT I"M NOT EASILY PURSUADED TO BELIEVING GARBAGE.

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

I have a feeling this guy and caljamscott are related.

 

[stealth2]

SOunds like it's time for your next round of meds, "daddy".

 

[singledaddytwo]

Blondelebinese, What Trashy Talk.....ohhhh Shoot, I Can't Use That One, You Already Did Against Me. Contradiction At Its Best . Yeah, I'm Gone, But Not Because You Ask Me To, It's Because I'm Right, Your Wrong And Theres Nothing You Can Do About It.