singledaddytwo
Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Pennsylvania
Hello, I am a single father of two children ages 4 and 12, both are girls. I suggested to my ex ( never married), upon our split up that I was going to accept no less than equal time with the children as she would have, 50/50 if you will. This all took place through the courts of PA 2 1/2 years ago. She has two children from a previous marriage, 1 in college, the other, 16 yrs old and living with her mom full time. My children visit their mother Sunday to Sunday every other week and in the beginning, this arrangement was working well to my knowledge but as time has past, it is becoming more evident that this arrangement was not such a good idea. The mother, having my two children in her care every other week, can not put aside going out drinking and staying home for the childrens benefit, and instead , pawns them off to someone who will watch them while she "does her thing". It was just brought to my attention by my 12 yr old that her mother allows the 16 yr old from previous marriage to sleep with her 20 yr old boyfriend who is practically living in the household in an effort by the mother to potentially get financial help from her daughters boyfriend. I am trying to raise my children with morals and values however things like this are really "getting in the way" to put it mildly. She has been through 4 boyfriends in the time we have been apart and this in itself is not healthy for 2 children who just went through it with me and their mother 2 1/2 yrs ago after 11 years together. It has also been brought to my attention that the mother took on a part time job 3 nights a week from 5PM to 10PM. This is not the arrangement we made 2 1/2 yrs ago . The time I agreed to give of every other week was intended to be time for their mother to spend with her children, not time with a babysitter, or their mothers 16 yr old daughter, or grandparents etc. She has a personals ad that specifically states "I LIKE DRINKING". Funny thing is, she drank maybe 3 times in the 11 years we were together. I just feel that personals ad is attracting the "wrong" kind of people I want around my children, the 16yr old sleeping with her 20 yr old boyfriend etc are things that are not healthy for my children and I'm afraid she is defeating my efforts in producing two children with morals, respect and all the other characteristics of decent human beings. Please help me decide what route to take to correct this as talking to her gets an OK at the time, but falls right back into the same situation within a week or two. I'm at my wits end as to what my legal rights are as I've never been too fond of the justice system and know that an adverse decision on the judges part that is anything less than in my favor would literally land me in jail as I love my girls dearly, I know their mother and I know the dedication I have given my children since the day this arrangement took effect two and 1/2 years ago. An adverse decision would literally destroy me. All advice & opinions are welcome. Again, this is a matter of 2 children who go from morally stable to the above every other week.
Hello, I am a single father of two children ages 4 and 12, both are girls. I suggested to my ex ( never married), upon our split up that I was going to accept no less than equal time with the children as she would have, 50/50 if you will. This all took place through the courts of PA 2 1/2 years ago. She has two children from a previous marriage, 1 in college, the other, 16 yrs old and living with her mom full time. My children visit their mother Sunday to Sunday every other week and in the beginning, this arrangement was working well to my knowledge but as time has past, it is becoming more evident that this arrangement was not such a good idea. The mother, having my two children in her care every other week, can not put aside going out drinking and staying home for the childrens benefit, and instead , pawns them off to someone who will watch them while she "does her thing". It was just brought to my attention by my 12 yr old that her mother allows the 16 yr old from previous marriage to sleep with her 20 yr old boyfriend who is practically living in the household in an effort by the mother to potentially get financial help from her daughters boyfriend. I am trying to raise my children with morals and values however things like this are really "getting in the way" to put it mildly. She has been through 4 boyfriends in the time we have been apart and this in itself is not healthy for 2 children who just went through it with me and their mother 2 1/2 yrs ago after 11 years together. It has also been brought to my attention that the mother took on a part time job 3 nights a week from 5PM to 10PM. This is not the arrangement we made 2 1/2 yrs ago . The time I agreed to give of every other week was intended to be time for their mother to spend with her children, not time with a babysitter, or their mothers 16 yr old daughter, or grandparents etc. She has a personals ad that specifically states "I LIKE DRINKING". Funny thing is, she drank maybe 3 times in the 11 years we were together. I just feel that personals ad is attracting the "wrong" kind of people I want around my children, the 16yr old sleeping with her 20 yr old boyfriend etc are things that are not healthy for my children and I'm afraid she is defeating my efforts in producing two children with morals, respect and all the other characteristics of decent human beings. Please help me decide what route to take to correct this as talking to her gets an OK at the time, but falls right back into the same situation within a week or two. I'm at my wits end as to what my legal rights are as I've never been too fond of the justice system and know that an adverse decision on the judges part that is anything less than in my favor would literally land me in jail as I love my girls dearly, I know their mother and I know the dedication I have given my children since the day this arrangement took effect two and 1/2 years ago. An adverse decision would literally destroy me. All advice & opinions are welcome. Again, this is a matter of 2 children who go from morally stable to the above every other week.
Last edited: