richard cooley said:
What is the name of your state? ny. i recently caught my wife tring to have an affair by reading about referances to the other person in her diary. before she could destroy the evidence i took digital photos of the contents which i have on my computer password protected. i also burned some cd's as a precaution. now it looks like we may resolve this issue but she wants me to delete the file on my computer saying i can keep the cd's. is there any diffrence between the file or a cd copy if i should need to go to court at a later date? this information would be decisive for me if i need to go to court.
My response:
As you know, New York is both a "Fault" and "No Fault" divorce State. If you decide to divorce your wife, the "Fault" route is VERY expensive. Since you may be divorcing, the "No Fault" route is quite inexpensive by comparison - - and besides, the "result" remains the same; i.e., you'd be divorced.
Now, insofar as your "evidence" of an affair is concerned, if you decide not to divorce, and you reconcile, that means you've "forgiven" your wife for any potential or actual "affair".
Once you've forgiven your wife, and you stay together, your "evidence" becomes worthless - - because the court would note that you stayed together and had forgiven her. So, you couldn't use your "evidence" in the future. The law does NOT allow you the "privilege" of using that "evidence" as a "guillotine", holding the same over her head as a threat.
Make your choice - - either divorce her now, or forgive her (by your deeds or words) and stay married. But, if you stay married, don't even think about using your "evidence" because in the future, it could, and will, backfire on you in court.
IAAL
