Divorce when kids are not his?

[Houston]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
I have not lived with my husband or had very much contact in the last 12 years. I want to get a divorce. The problem is I have three children that have his name on their birth certificate, but they are not his children. He does not pay child support or see the children. I have been taking care of them soley. How do I get a divorce? I wanted to do a no-fault divorce. I want to fill out the paperwork on my own.

 

[Isis1]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Texas
I have not lived with my husband or had very much contact in the last 12 years. I want to get a divorce. The problem is I have three children that have his name on their birth certificate, but they are not his children. He does not pay child support or see the children. I have been taking care of them soley. How do I get a divorce? I wanted to do a no-fault divorce. I want to fill out the paperwork on my own.

so where is the father/s of these children?

 

[ecmst12]

If hubby's on the BC, then legally he IS the father. It's a little late for anyone else to be claiming paternity, that would be extremely disruptive to the kids' lives.

 

[Houston]

For the most, they are not involved either.

For the most, they are not involved either.

 

[Proserpina]

For the most, they are not involved either.

Did you both know at the time that the children were not biologically his? And what exactly does "for the most" mean?

Are the fathers involved or not?

 

[Houston]

no they are not

and yes he ha known from the beginning

i am not looking for support, I just want a divorce, it is time

 

[Proserpina]

no they are not

and yes he ha known from the beginning

i am not looking for support, I just want a divorce, it is time

Then what are you asking?

Your soon-to-be ex is the legal father of the children. Are you asking whether it matters if he's the biological father or not in terms of custody?

 

[Ohiogal]

HOw old are the children? File for divorce with children and ask the court to disestablish his paternity due to the fact that X, y and Z are the actual fathers and you have been separated for 12 years. Then you will have to go after x, y and z for paternity. Why you haven't done that yet is beyond me. This only works if the children are not 11 years old or above but are young. You MIGHT have luck with that. If you dont' have luck with disestablishing then the court will rule on custody and support issues at the time of the divorce.

 

[Houston]

My question was, I want to file the paperwork myself, through the court. Can this be done or do I have to have a lawyer? There will be nothing to divide, no custody agreement. Will the court allow me to have full custody with no visitation arrangements? As I said earlier, we have not had much communication in the last 12 years. My kids are 14, 11, and 10.

My main question is I want to file the paperwork myself, can I do that, even though I will not be making any type of child support or visitation arrangements?

 

[Houston]

They are fine, because am really all they know. It is hard to miss something you have not had. However, there are questions asked and emotional difficulties, of course. I have been able to provide what they have needed. I have made it a priority to put everything I have into them. By coaching, volunteering at their schools, and being apart of their life. This I am sure has helped in their confidence and self esteem. I do believe both of which are affected by absent paernts. We are also very emotionally close, because it is only us. It has never been easy, but well worth it.

 

[mistoffolees]

They are fine, because am really all they know. It is hard to miss something you have not had. .

But they have had a man living in the house for 12 years who is their legal father - even if their biological father is different. Surely there must be some consideration as to visitation, at the very least, and possibly custody.

What does your husband want? A lot will come down to that. If he wants at least joint custody, you're going to have a very expensive, time consuming battle to end that - even if he's not the biological father. If he doesn't want to see the kids, it will, of course, be easier.

Also, the timing doesn't make sense. You've been married for 12 years, but the oldest child is 14 - and your husband's name is on the birth certificate even though he's not the biological father? And you say he knew about it all along? That doesn't make sense. Why would he sign a birth certificate for someone else's kid when you weren't married at the time?

 

[Bali Hai]

But they have had a man living in the house for 12 years who is their legal father - even if their biological father is different. Surely there must be some consideration as to visitation, at the very least, and possibly custody.

What does your husband want? A lot will come down to that. If he wants at least joint custody, you're going to have a very expensive, time consuming battle to end that - even if he's not the biological father. If he doesn't want to see the kids, it will, of course, be easier.

Also, the timing doesn't make sense. You've been married for 12 years, but the oldest child is 14 - and your husband's name is on the birth certificate even though he's not the biological father? And you say he knew about it all along? That doesn't make sense. Why would he sign a birth certificate for someone else's kid when you weren't married at the time?

The answer to that is obvious; he's STUPID!!

 

[Isis1]

But they have had a man living in the house for 12 years who is their legal father - even if their biological father is different. Surely there must be some consideration as to visitation, at the very least, and possibly custody.

What does your husband want? A lot will come down to that. If he wants at least joint custody, you're going to have a very expensive, time consuming battle to end that - even if he's not the biological father. If he doesn't want to see the kids, it will, of course, be easier.

Also, the timing doesn't make sense. You've been married for 12 years, but the oldest child is 14 - and your husband's name is on the birth certificate even though he's not the biological father? And you say he knew about it all along? That doesn't make sense. Why would he sign a birth certificate for someone else's kid when you weren't married at the time?

i think the OP stated the husband hasn't been home for the past 12 years. they seperated, just never got a divorce. legally, she's married. but been living single for 12 years.

 

[Houston]

I have already stated I have not had much contact with him in 12 years. He has not lived in the house either. He will agree to whatever. We seperated because he was doing drugs and for about 10 of those 12 years he did not have a permanent residense. He has since then got clean, job, place to stay. My issue is not with him, I want to know is it acceptable to the court for us to NOT have visitation and child support arrangements. I want to do it this way, incase something were to happen to me, I don't want him to have custody.

We were togther, when I had my first son. We thought we were doing the right thing. He was a good person, until he got on drugs. My other two children took his name because we were still legally married. The hospital told me that was the way it was.

 

[Isis1]

I have already stated I have not had much contact with him in 12 years. He has not lived in the house either. He will agree to whatever. We seperated because he was doing drugs and for about 10 of those 12 years he did not have a permanent residense. He has since then got clean, job, place to stay. My issue is not with him, I want to know is it acceptable to the court for us to NOT have visitation and child support arrangements. I want to do it this way, incase something were to happen to me, I don't want him to have custody.

We were togther, when I had my first son. We thought we were doing the right thing. He was a good person, until he got on drugs. My other two children took his name because we were still legally married. The hospital told me that was the way it was.

they were right. however, Og's advice was the best. You may want to at least consult with an attorney. i honestly think an attorney on bundled services might be a good idea. one that just shows up at the hearing.