Divorced, she has child, not mine, but legally?

[sean582]

What is the name of your state? Virginia (married and divorced).

Hello! I am Sean! So I am legally divorced, and my ex-wife has recently had a child. I did the math and determined that (A) the child is not mine and (B) the child was conceived when we were separated but still legally married.

My ex-wife does not deny that the child has a different father, but an attorney friend of mine suggested that I need to see a local lawyer about getting documentation making sure the child isn’t mine, or some sort of declaration or something of that nature. My friend states my ex-wife, if she so inclined at a later date, could actually come after me for support of this child.

I just need more details on the importance of these documents and what they are called and where to get them.

All advice is appreciated, thank you in advance and happy holidays!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state? Virginia (married and divorced).

Hello! I am Sean! So I am legally divorced, and my ex-wife has recently had a child. I did the math and determined that (A) the child is not mine and (B) the child was conceived when we were separated but still legally married.

My ex-wife does not deny that the child has a different father, but an attorney friend of mine suggested that I need to see a local lawyer about getting documentation making sure the child isn’t mine, or some sort of declaration or something of that nature. My friend states my ex-wife, if she so inclined at a later date, could actually come after me for support of this child.

I just need more details on the importance of these documents and what they are called and where to get them.

All advice is appreciated, thank you in advance and happy holidays!What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Was this child born during the marriage? If the answer is yes - congratulations. You have a child. You NEED to go to court to disestablish paternity to make sure you're not on the hook.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

I think this one is that they got divorced and the X didn't disclose that she was pregnant. He's wanting to make sure he isn't on the hook.

 

[sean582]

Child was born AFTER divorce.

Sorry for not being clear at first. The child was definitely conceived before the divorce, but definitely born after the divorce.

 

[Proserpina]

I think this one is that they got divorced and the X didn't disclose that she was pregnant. He's wanting to make sure he isn't on the hook.

You are correct

OP, how long after the divorce was this child born?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

If mom goes after you for child support, ask for a DNA exam. It can clearly prove that you aren't papa.

 

[sean582]

You are correct

OP, how long after the divorce was this child born?

7.5 months

...and Tinkerbell, I know they would never be able to PROVE i am the father, but just making sure I have all legal bases covered, i've heard horror stories of guys getting pinned for child support even hough it's not their child.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

The key is NOT ignoring any summons from courts the courts.

 

[Ohiogal]

7.5 months

...and Tinkerbell, I know they would never be able to PROVE i am the father, but just making sure I have all legal bases covered, i've heard horror stories of guys getting pinned for child support even hough it's not their child.

Unless the baby daddy signed an AOP you can be on the hook for paternity of this child. Your ex wife by the way committed fraud as she did not disclose the pregnancy during the divorce trial/hearing. You are legally the father unless you have been disestablished as daddy or unless baby daddy stepped up and signed the AOP putting him on the birth certificate.

 

[Proserpina]

Unless the baby daddy signed an AOP you can be on the hook for paternity of this child. Your ex wife by the way committed fraud as she did not disclose the pregnancy during the divorce trial/hearing. You are legally the father unless you have been disestablished as daddy or unless baby daddy stepped up and signed the AOP putting him on the birth certificate.

Mom would have only been about 6 weeks pregnant when they got divorced - it's possible that she didn't actually know she was pregnant at the time.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Unless the baby daddy signed an AOP you can be on the hook for paternity of this child. Your ex wife by the way committed fraud as she did not disclose the pregnancy during the divorce trial/hearing. You are legally the father unless you have been disestablished as daddy or unless baby daddy stepped up and signed the AOP putting him on the birth certificate.

So, what can he do at this point? Nothing?

 

[sean582]

Unless the baby daddy signed an AOP you can be on the hook for paternity of this child. Your ex wife by the way committed fraud as she did not disclose the pregnancy during the divorce trial/hearing. You are legally the father unless you have been disestablished as daddy or unless baby daddy stepped up and signed the AOP putting him on the birth certificate.

Disestablish myself as daddy, that's what I want to do! How do I go about this? And what does AOP mean?

Thanks for all help so far, I don't want to go the course of wait-and-see because I get deployed and move frequently and I would hate for some sort of summons to come forth and they aren't able to find me or think I'm evading.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Basically, the "father" of the child needs to step up to the plate here. an AOP is "acknowledgement of paternity" which can be signed at the hospital.

 

[sean582]

Basically, the "father" of the child needs to step up to the plate here. an AOP is "acknowledgement of paternity" which can be signed at the hospital.

This may or may not have been done; I don't have any more contact with the X than I need to. If I request to see the child's birth cert, and the daddy is listed there, does that mean I am free and clear? Or is there more I should do to disestablish?

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

It could be a simple as ASKING mom who dad is? Hey, I hear congratulations are in order. Who's dad so I can say congrats to him too?