do ihave a say?

[confused in sd]

What is the name of your state? sd

My wife and i are separated but havent filed papers yet. we have a 7 year old son who she took with her when she left. She wants to leave the state to go visit a guy she met on the internet. She says that she wants to go toget awayform the problems for a while but i think its a booty call. only way she can leave thestate tho is if she takes my son with her. He cant stay with me while she is away cause of my work hours. Do i have a right to say no my son will not be leaving the state?

 

[nextwife]

Why can't you have your child in daycare or camp during the day while you work? I'm a working mom and my kid LOVES summer day camp.

I sure would NOT allow my child to be in the same residence as some unknown potential looney toon or serial killer that she only knows from the internet! Fight tooth and nail to keep wife from taking him with her on her irresponsible pursuit of an intenet fantasy. Let mom go, but fight to keep kiddo, even if you need to make arrangements for daytime. Nothing wrong with kids being in structured activities during the day.

Do you also work nights? Maybe you can find a sitter.

 

[confused in sd]

no i leave for work at 5 am and dont return home till 430 pm most day care facilities here in rapid city dont open till 6 am which is my start work time. I also know that the mom is very against our child being put in day care i suggested it when he was four so she could return to work and she said no

 

[nextwife]

no i leave for work at 5 am and dont return home till 430 pm most day care facilities here in rapid city dont open till 6 am which is my start work time. I also know that the mom is very against our child being put in day care i suggested it when he was four so she could return to work and she said no

And what does she know, anyway? She's willing to move her kid in with a virtual stranger that she can't really know.

Day care is CERTAINLY better than living in the same home with some mystery guy She can't REALLY know what he is like, or whether he's dangerous, nuts or what. Let her "learn" about him WITHOUT taking your kid along for the ride.

Lord knows what this guy really has in mind. I'd suggest shopping for a day care alternative that opens earlier, or an au pair.

 

[GrowUp!]

no i leave for work at 5 am and dont return home till 430 pm most day care facilities here in rapid city dont open till 6 am which is my start work time. I also know that the mom is very against our child being put in day care i suggested it when he was four so she could return to work and she said no

Do you have parents who can care for the child and then take the child to day care?

Given the potential situation your spouse is willing to put your child into, what you really should do is file papers and officially retain legal custody of the child and also ask for child support.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

The answer to your situation is no, there is absolutely nothing you can do about her taking the child out of the state. Not until one or the other of you files and begins a divorce proceeding. Until then, you are still married and each party retains the rights to do as they please with the child.

However, once either party files then the child may not be removed from the jurisdiction of the court without permission.

so, quit making excuses and file,then make arrangements for your child to stay with you. Or is your only reason for coming here is NOT for the safety of your child but to control your soon to be ex.?

 

[CJane]

And what does she know, anyway? She's willing to move her kid in with a virtual stranger that she can't really know.

Day care is CERTAINLY better than living in the same home with some mystery guy She can't REALLY know what he is like, or whether he's dangerous, nuts or what. Let her "learn" about him WITHOUT taking your kid along for the ride.

Lord knows what this guy really has in mind. I'd suggest shopping for a day care alternative that opens earlier, or an au pair.

Ummmm... according to OP, mom is going to VISIT someone, not move in with them. There's nothing in his post that indicates mom is intending to relocate.

And frankly, if dad is SO worried about his child's well-being, he needs to follow BB's advice and file for divorce/custody and an order to keep the child in the county until the court rules on the motions. Or, he needs to just sit on his hands and let what happens, happen.