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Don't want her to

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reminisce

Junior Member
State is CT

Me and my ex-wife have a 6 year old son. We both lost our guardianship rights a couple years ago due to domestic violence, I'll admit most of it my fault because of drugs. My ex-wife has filed for a reinstatement. Currently he is with my parents. I want him to stay with my parents. My parents don't want him to go. We are both afraid if she gets him back, she will never let us see him, even though she tells the court the complete opposite.

She is married again and stable and has two other children with her. One with this marriage and one she had before us. I am on parole until April. I've been in and out for the past 20 years. I've changed, noone else thinks I did. I do have a lengthy violence and narcotic history.

My question is, since me and my parents oppose of the transfer, will the judge reward her with it. DCF and my son's lawyer approve of the transfer. Is this all the judge needs? I want to file for my rights back this summer. Can she oppose it? Will it be difficult because of my past history? Thx.
 


weenor

Senior Member
If the GAL and the agency approve the judge probably will too.

Your history will be problem, not as much if you have a sufficient period of sobriety. Document everything, regarding your stability and sobriety and you will likely get some visitation...Only you know if she will oppose your petition.
 
reminisce said:
State is CT

Me and my ex-wife have a 6 year old son. We both lost our guardianship rights a couple years ago due to domestic violence, I'll admit most of it my fault because of drugs. My ex-wife has filed for a reinstatement. Currently he is with my parents. I want him to stay with my parents. My parents don't want him to go. We are both afraid if she gets him back, she will never let us see him, even though she tells the court the complete opposite.

She is married again and stable and has two other children with her. One with this marriage and one she had before us. I am on parole until April. I've been in and out for the past 20 years. I've changed, noone else thinks I did. I do have a lengthy violence and narcotic history.

My question is, since me and my parents oppose of the transfer, will the judge reward her with it. DCF and my son's lawyer approve of the transfer. Is this all the judge needs? I want to file for my rights back this summer. Can she oppose it? Will it be difficult because of my past history? Thx.
I understand that your parents don't want your son to go, but don't you think your son would be better off with his mother at this point? You said that she is stable now.
 

Litigation!

Senior Member
My response:

One of the main goals for a Family Law court is to attempt reunification between child and parent(s). Reunification is seen to be in a minor's "best interests." However, if the child cannot be safely returned to the parent(s) within the prescribed reunification period, the juvenile court must select and implement a permanent placement plan for the child--long-term foster care, appointment of a guardian or termination of parental rights to free the child for adoption.

But, make no mistake - - if there is any possible way to reunify parent and child, the court will do so.

IAAL
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
You and your parents have ulterior motives to not wanting the child reunified with the mother. The court is less likely to take your (and their) opinion over that of DCF. Sorry.
 

reminisce

Junior Member
stealth2 said:
You and your parents have ulterior motives to not wanting the child reunified with the mother. The court is less likely to take your (and their) opinion over that of DCF. Sorry.
My son has been with my parents for 5 years, doesn't that count for something? I can bring up stuff from years ago that could make the court second guess her. The trial is coming up this spring. Will she have to keep him in his school or will she beable to transfer him? They live in different towns.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
reminisce said:
My son has been with my parents for 5 years, doesn't that count for something? I can bring up stuff from years ago that could make the court second guess her. The trial is coming up this spring. Will she have to keep him in his school or will she beable to transfer him? They live in different towns.
In your original post you said you both lost your rights 2 years ago....:confused:

She will be able to transfer him...at 6 he shouldn't have any problems adjusting to the new school...little ones make friends fast...:)
 
reminisce said:
My son has been with my parents for 5 years, doesn't that count for something? I can bring up stuff from years ago that could make the court second guess her. The trial is coming up this spring. Will she have to keep him in his school or will she beable to transfer him? They live in different towns.
You could bring up stuff from years ago, but does that matter now - and it doesn't sound like your record is that great. If she's stable and has proven that, then it's probably in your son's best interest to be with his mother. Many children change schools during their lives and although there is an adjustment period, it's not the end of the world. My children switched schools and it actually turned out that they like their new school better and have even more friends now (ones from the old school and ones from the new school).
 

reminisce

Junior Member
baystategirl said:
In your original post you said you both lost your rights 2 years ago....:confused:

She will be able to transfer him...at 6 he shouldn't have any problems adjusting to the new school...little ones make friends fast...:)
He and his sister were placed in a foster home at first, my son was one at the time, she went to a battered womens shelter. He was then place with grandparents, his sister with her father until my ex got stable.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
reminisce said:
He and his sister were placed in a foster home at first, my son was one at the time, she went to a battered womens shelter. He was then place with grandparents, his sister with her father until my ex got stable.
The bottom line is that if DFS and your son's lawyer are in favor of the transfer, its going to happen whether you and your parents like it or not.
 

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