ex-boyfriend/small claims court

[Alilaclady]

I am in NH. My now ex-boyfriend lived with me for a couple of months in late 1999/early 2000. We were on again off again until about 2 months ago. He is now back living with the woman who was his ex-girlfriend while I was dating him.
He has about $400 worth of books, cds, computer disks belonging to me that he refuses to return and has for over a year. I have boxes and boxes of books, tons of clothes, many cds and many computer things that belong to him that he keeps telling me that he will come and get and hasn't over the last year. He calls me and leaves me all these voice mails professing his love but refuses to speak to me in person. The woman he is living with keeps calling me and screaming at me not to talk to himand threatening me that she will make me sorry if I do. I keep getting all these hang up calls. Now I am getting weird emails from people I don't know telling me they know all about me and mentioning private details that only my ex would know. These emails tell me that I am being watched.

I am a little angry and a little scared. I thought we had ended things ok. (He is an alcoholic and has major depression and I couldn't take it anymore.) I would like my stuff back. I would also like his stuff out of my house. More importantly, I would like both him and his girlfriend and their calls and emails out of my life.

What should I do? I tried sending a registered letter but he refused to pick it up. Should I get a lawyer to send him a letter? Should I file a restraining order against him and his girlfriend? Should I take him to small claims court for my stuff? Can I throw out/sell his stuff at some point so I don't have to look at it all the time?

Thanks for any help you all might provide.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

This is real, real, simple. The only reason that you're receiving weird, or unwanted, telephone calls and e-mails is because you're allowing it. It's your fault.

Forget about your "stuff". Throw his "stuff" out. Change your phone number and e-mail address.

When you decide to take your power back, you'll then be able to go on with your life. Until then, it's your fault.

Remember the old saying, "Screw me once, shame on you. Screw me twice, shame on me". Well, guess what ? You're letting people screw you. Shame on you.

IAAL

 

[JETX]

With all due respect to IAAL, I have a different 'spin':

Before you throw out ANYTHING of his, do the following:
1) Take pictures of everything as it is. Leave it alone and shoot a picture, then open a box and shoot a picture, then take out the contents and shoot a picture... not unlike a crime scene. While taking pictures, do so from the perspective of "this is someone else's property and I am possibly going to be liable for its condition, so I better take good pictures.".
2) Then, make an itemized list of each and EVERY item of property.
3) Enlist the help of a friend to inventory each thing (he/she could even write the inventory list). Then have both of you sign and date the list.
4) Now, put all of the property, pictures and inventory in a safe place.
5) Send the 'ex' TWO letters. One by Certified mail RRR and the other by regular mail (in the letter, detail that TWO letters are being sent). Include a copy of the inventory and a DEMAND that the 'ex' call (or write) you within a reasonable time (14 days??) to arrange pickup of HIS property. Include a statement that you will arrange to donate his property to charity if he doesn't contact you for it and offer to send him the charity receipt for his tax records. (Do not send them the photos, they are to protect you in the event of a problem).
6) In the same letter (5 above), include a list of YOUR property that he has (be as accurate as possible) and DEMAND that he contact you to arrange for YOU to pick up your property.

Finally, if he doesn't contact you about getting your property, you might have to take action in Small Claims to recover your property. Don't worry about his. Donate it and feel happy about it helping someone else.