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Ex-girlfriend demanding money one year after breakup (property involved)

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LegacyGT

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I'll try to keep a long story as short as possible. My ex-girlfriend and I lived together for roughly 3 1/2 years (December 2011 - August 2015). For one year we rented a house together, for the last next 2 1/2 years we lived together in a home that I purchased soley in my name. She has prior financial issues and issues with managing money, and at some point shortly after we began living together she asked if I would handle all of the finances. From then until the time we separated, we had all of our combined income deposited into my bank account, which was used to pay the rent (and later mortgage), any utilities, food, etc. We verbally agreed that we would also set aside some money out of the account jointly every month for savings, and if the relationship were ever to end, the money in savings would be split between the two of us. This was the extent of our agreement regarding money prior to our breakup.

When I purchased my home in December 2012, I borrowed some money from my parents for the down payment (which was later paid back to them in full by me alone), and we spent a good portion of "our" savings on having a backyard put in, furniture, and various other things both having to do with the house and not having anything to do with the house (eating out, vacation, etc.) over the course of the next three years, resulting in there typically being little to no money in the savings account. Also over the course of this time, her income into the joint account was always lower than mine, from as little as about 50% of my monthly income, to more frequently about 75-80%.

In March 2015 we purchased a vehicle jointly in both of our names, which was to be her car. The payment for the car and insurance was made by me out of my account, using "our" money the same as all other bills, mortgage, etc.

In July 2015, we separated, and at that time we had no money in savings and roughly $1000 in credit card debt. I asked that she pay a portion of that debt, and we agreed to what furniture would be kept by whom, which resulted in roughly a 50/50 split of the furniture in the house.

In November 2015, she contacted me and told me she had been going through signifitant financial issues, could not afford some maintenance that was needed on her vehicle and a deposit on a rental unit, and felt she was owed more out of our relationship as she contributed significantly to the house which I owe and she did not have ownership in. I agreed to pay her roughly $2500, and wrote up a contract which we both signed which stated that the $2500 was payment in full for anything to do with the relationship, and that no further compensation would be owed by me to her. I also stipulated that the car payment was to be continued to be made by her, and that she could have any proceeds from the sale of the car at any time. I wrote up the contract myself and thought of it as more of a symbolic gesture at the time. We did not have it witnessed or notarized.

I recenly sold my house and was paid out for equity in the home. After the sale, she contacted me and advised me she had seen the home listed and talked to an "attorney friend" who advised her that she is owed a portion of the equity in the home because of her financial contribution while we were together and the fact that she deposited her pay checks into my bank account for over 3 years. She said that given the fact that I allocated every dollar she made, she can take me to court and have my bank records subpoena'd to force me to prove how I alocated every dollar of hers she ever deposited to my account and what is owed to her. She also acknowledged via email the signing of the contract in November 2015 and that it was a "stupid" contract, essentially dismissing it in her mind.

That's where I stand at this point, and am wondering if she has any legal basis in California to collect anything from me. She never had her name on the title to the home, never made a payment for the mortgage from her bank account, and agreed in writing that I would not owe her anything further financially as of November 2015.

In my opinion simply her depositing her pay checks in my account wouldnt seem to entitle her to any repayment whatsoever without some type of agreement as to me reimbursing her at some point in the future, which there never was. Also in my opinion the contract she signed in November 2015 should supercede anything else and prevent her from collecting anything from me at this point. However, I am not an attorney so would like to know what my exposure is, if any, and what action I should take, if any.

Any advice would be appreciated.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

I'll try to keep a long story as short as possible. My ex-girlfriend and I lived together for roughly 3 1/2 years (December 2011 - August 2015). For one year we rented a house together, for the last next 2 1/2 years we lived together in a home that I purchased soley in my name. She has prior financial issues and issues with managing money, and at some point shortly after we began living together she asked if I would handle all of the finances. From then until the time we separated, we had all of our combined income deposited into my bank account, which was used to pay the rent (and later mortgage), any utilities, food, etc. We verbally agreed that we would also set aside some money out of the account jointly every month for savings, and if the relationship were ever to end, the money in savings would be split between the two of us. This was the extent of our agreement regarding money prior to our breakup.

When I purchased my home in December 2012, I borrowed some money from my parents for the down payment (which was later paid back to them in full by me alone), and we spent a good portion of "our" savings on having a backyard put in, furniture, and various other things both having to do with the house and not having anything to do with the house (eating out, vacation, etc.) over the course of the next three years, resulting in there typically being little to no money in the savings account. Also over the course of this time, her income into the joint account was always lower than mine, from as little as about 50% of my monthly income, to more frequently about 75-80%.

In March 2015 we purchased a vehicle jointly in both of our names, which was to be her car. The payment for the car and insurance was made by me out of my account, using "our" money the same as all other bills, mortgage, etc.

In July 2015, we separated, and at that time we had no money in savings and roughly $1000 in credit card debt. I asked that she pay a portion of that debt, and we agreed to what furniture would be kept by whom, which resulted in roughly a 50/50 split of the furniture in the house.

In November 2015, she contacted me and told me she had been going through signifitant financial issues, could not afford some maintenance that was needed on her vehicle and a deposit on a rental unit, and felt she was owed more out of our relationship as she contributed significantly to the house which I owe and she did not have ownership in. I agreed to pay her roughly $2500, and wrote up a contract which we both signed which stated that the $2500 was payment in full for anything to do with the relationship, and that no further compensation would be owed by me to her. I also stipulated that the car payment was to be continued to be made by her, and that she could have any proceeds from the sale of the car at any time. I wrote up the contract myself and thought of it as more of a symbolic gesture at the time. We did not have it witnessed or notarized.

I recenly sold my house and was paid out for equity in the home. After the sale, she contacted me and advised me she had seen the home listed and talked to an "attorney friend" who advised her that she is owed a portion of the equity in the home because of her financial contribution while we were together and the fact that she deposited her pay checks into my bank account for over 3 years. She said that given the fact that I allocated every dollar she made, she can take me to court and have my bank records subpoena'd to force me to prove how I alocated every dollar of hers she ever deposited to my account and what is owed to her. She also acknowledged via email the signing of the contract in November 2015 and that it was a "stupid" contract, essentially dismissing it in her mind.

That's where I stand at this point, and am wondering if she has any legal basis in California to collect anything from me. She never had her name on the title to the home, never made a payment for the mortgage from her bank account, and agreed in writing that I would not owe her anything further financially as of November 2015.

In my opinion simply her depositing her pay checks in my account wouldnt seem to entitle her to any repayment whatsoever without some type of agreement as to me reimbursing her at some point in the future, which there never was. Also in my opinion the contract she signed in November 2015 should supercede anything else and prevent her from collecting anything from me at this point. However, I am not an attorney so would like to know what my exposure is, if any, and what action I should take, if any.

Any advice would be appreciated.
The only possible glitch I see for you is that you had total control of her income for the entire time that she lived with you. You would be in a stronger position had she just been paying you 1/2 of the bills, because then it would be easy to demonstrate that she was paying rent. However, it sounds like some of her money went to things that improved your home, on top of that, and therefore there might be an unjust enrichment claim to be made. Whether that could be overcome by the 2500.00 you already gave her depends on factors not in evidence.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
The OP has a settlement agreement and release from further claims. I don't see anywhere for the ex to go with this.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
The OP has a settlement agreement and release from further claims. I don't see anywhere for the ex to go with this.
Possibly, but I would want a local attorney to confirm that the settlement agreement is valid.
 

LegacyGT

Junior Member
The only possible glitch I see for you is that you had total control of her income for the entire time that she lived with you. You would be in a stronger position had she just been paying you 1/2 of the bills, because then it would be easy to demonstrate that she was paying rent. However, it sounds like some of her money went to things that improved your home, on top of that, and therefore there might be an unjust enrichment claim to be made. Whether that could be overcome by the 2500.00 you already gave her depends on factors not in evidence.
Thank you for the quick response.

If I were to go back and total up every dollar deposited from her into my accounts and then compare that to expenses not related to home improvement (1/2 utilities, 1/2 our joint credit card accounts, her car/insurance payments, etc.), if those expenses exceeded what she deposited, would that strengthen my position?

Could you provide an example of a way that the contract we signed would not overcome a claim being made now?
 

xylene

Senior Member
Personally I think you took advantage of this woman.

I think you should pay off her car loan and give her clear title to her car, and then you really won't have anything to do with her anymore.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Thank you for the quick response.

If I were to go back and total up every dollar deposited from her into my accounts and then compare that to expenses not related to home improvement (1/2 utilities, 1/2 our joint credit card accounts, her car/insurance payments, etc.), if those expenses exceeded what she deposited, would that strengthen my position?

Could you provide an example of a way that the contract we signed would not overcome a claim being made now?
Instead of asking us to give random examples of why the agreement might not be valid, I would suggest (as LdiJ suggested) that you take a few minutes to speak with a local attorney. I think you're fine, but an attorney can tell for sure.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Personally I think you took advantage of this woman.

I think you should pay off her car loan and give her clear title to her car, and then you really won't have anything to do with her anymore.
Please address it from the legal standpoint too...assuming the settlement agreement is binding, do you think, legally, that the OP owes anything to the woman?
 

xylene

Senior Member
She can still totally burn you on the car loan, you know that right?

Your 'settlement' doesn't change that.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Thank you for the quick response.

If I were to go back and total up every dollar deposited from her into my accounts and then compare that to expenses not related to home improvement (1/2 utilities, 1/2 our joint credit card accounts, her car/insurance payments, etc.), if those expenses exceeded what she deposited, would that strengthen my position?
Possibly, possibly not. It depends upon what the joint credit cards paid for.

Could you provide an example of a way that the contract we signed would not overcome a claim being made now?
You really need to run the contact you signed by a local attorney...who can read and view it in its entirety as well as look at it based on state law and the climates of your local courts.

Like I said before, if you had not fully controlled her money I would be telling you to just blow her off. However the fact that you fully controlled her money makes it a bit stickier. Also, did you file a Schedule E with your tax return claiming the income and expenses relating to her being your tenant?
 

LegacyGT

Junior Member
Personally I think you took advantage of this woman.

I think you should pay off her car loan and give her clear title to her car, and then you really won't have anything to do with her anymore.
Please elaborate as to how I did that. I didn't force her to give me her money and would have prefered to have her pay 1/2 of the reasonable expenses every month. She asked me to manage the money so that she could feel free to go out and charge up the credit card each month and not worry about it. She benefited from that the entire time we were together, while I worried about the finances and took on the liability of owning the home. There could have just as easily been a drop in the housing market which would have left me upside down on the home loan, not her.

From a legal aspect, please elaborate as to how can she burn me on the car loan? If she stops paying for it, is there a reason I can't continue to make the payments myself and take the car back? It's titled in my name as well as hers.
 

LegacyGT

Junior Member
Possibly, possibly not. It depends upon what the joint credit cards paid for.



You really need to run the contact you signed by a local attorney...who can read and view it in its entirety as well as look at it based on state law and the climates of your local courts.

Like I said before, if you had not fully controlled her money I would be telling you to just blow her off. However the fact that you fully controlled her money makes it a bit stickier. Also, did you file a Schedule E with your tax return claiming the income and expenses relating to her being your tenant?
Thank you, I will run the contract by a local attorney.

I figured the credit card issue may come up. It's literally three years of purchases for groceries, gasoline, restaurants, etc. There would be no way to differentiate many of the charges as to whether they were her, me, or us jointly, however I could possibly contact the credit card company for a statement of charges from her card only.

No, I did not claim her income or expenses, we always filed separately.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
If she stops paying for it, is there a reason I can't continue to make the payments myself and take the car back? It's titled in my name as well as hers.
Sure, you could continue to make the payments, but you've already agreed that it's HER car. If she doesn't pay, then you can't just take the car back.
 

LegacyGT

Junior Member
Sure, you could continue to make the payments, but you've already agreed that it's HER car. If she doesn't pay, then you can't just take the car back.
Not trying to be ignorant here, but how is me taking the car back any different from a bank repossessing a vehicle after defaulting on loan? She and I agreed that she would continue to make the car payments, if she stops doing so, she has gone outside of that agreement. How does she still have the only right to the vehicle in that case? It's her car based on agreement between her and I (which she is now going against), but in terms of the DMV title and loan documents, it's owned jointly between the two of us.

*Edit- to clarify, I didn't mean take the car back to the dealer for a refund, I know that's not possible. I mean take physical posession of the car myself rather than leave it with her.
 
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