Extra Curricular activities question

[olhobbes]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Per court order, my ex and I have joint custody of our daughter. My ex signed up our daughter for gymnastics, and my daughter has asked me to come to gymnastics during her mother's custodial time. Her mother has requested that I not come because she feels in interferes with her custodial time. Note: All I do when I go is give her a hug ( she's usually in a play room watching TV, not hanging out with her mother ), watch her do her gymnatsics thing, then give her a hug and leave ( where she goes off to play with her friends ).

Our custody order makes no mention of this situation, but I have always felt that our daughter's extra curricular activities are hers, thus who she wants there is her choice not her mother's or mine. However, before I respond to her mother's request as such I wanted to make sure there isn't some CA stipulation/law that I would be running afoul by continuing to go to her gymnastic practices during her mother's custodial time.

Thanks for the input!

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Per court order, my ex and I have joint custody of our daughter. My ex signed up our daughter for gymnastics, and my daughter has asked me to come to gymnastics during her mother's custodial time. Her mother has requested that I not come because she feels in interferes with her custodial time. Note: All I do when I go is give her a hug ( she's usually in a play room watching TV, not hanging out with her mother ), watch her do her gymnatsics thing, then give her a hug and leave ( where she goes off to play with her friends ).

Our custody order makes no mention of this situation, but I have always felt that our daughter's extra curricular activities are hers, thus who she wants there is her choice not her mother's or mine. However, before I respond to her mother's request as such I wanted to make sure there isn't some CA stipulation/law that I would be running afoul by continuing to go to her gymnastic practices during her mother's custodial time.

Thanks for the input!

There's no law about it and Mom can't stop you from going to a public place. She is, however, creating an unnecessarily adversarial co-parenting relationship which will be harmful for the child in the long run.

Have her sign up here and we'll tell her to quit being a jerk.

 

[olhobbes]

This is tame compared to her other behavior, frankly. As I have no control over her brand of crazy, though, I just focus on what's in my daughter's best interests and go from there. She wants me there, so I will be there.

Thanks for the insight, that's pretty much inline with what I was thinking but I wanted to be sure.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA

Per court order, my ex and I have joint custody of our daughter. My ex signed up our daughter for gymnastics, and my daughter has asked me to come to gymnastics during her mother's custodial time. Her mother has requested that I not come because she feels in interferes with her custodial time. Note: All I do when I go is give her a hug ( she's usually in a play room watching TV, not hanging out with her mother ), watch her do her gymnatsics thing, then give her a hug and leave ( where she goes off to play with her friends ).

Our custody order makes no mention of this situation, but I have always felt that our daughter's extra curricular activities are hers, thus who she wants there is her choice not her mother's or mine. However, before I respond to her mother's request as such I wanted to make sure there isn't some CA stipulation/law that I would be running afoul by continuing to go to her gymnastic practices during her mother's custodial time.

Thanks for the input!

Are you talking about practises or meets? Its not really normal to have spectators for practises, so mom might possibly have some leverage there.
Definitely mom would be wrong if she attempted to bar you from attending meets.

 

[Ohiogal]

Are you talking about practises or meets? Its not really normal to have spectators for practises, so mom might possibly have some leverage there.
Definitely mom would be wrong if she attempted to bar you from attending meets.

Many practices have spectators or places for parents to watch. HOw long has it been since your daughter was involved in such activities? Mom can NOT stop him from attending his child's practices or meets.

 

[mistoffolees]

Are you talking about practises or meets? Its not really normal to have spectators for practises, so mom might possibly have some leverage there..

Really? My daughter is involved in a wide range of activities from gymnastics to cheer to music to dance - and every single one has a sitting area for parents to watch practices.

 

[olhobbes]

Are you talking about practises or meets? Its not really normal to have spectators for practises, so mom might possibly have some leverage there.
Definitely mom would be wrong if she attempted to bar you from attending meets.

Practices, although I'm not seeing the distinction you are drawing. Can you elaborate? I'm interested in legal terms or sections of law that she may use in future custody issues.

Some backstory;

My daughter has been going to gymnastics for several years now. She recently changed gyms. At the previous gyms I attended all of her practices/events. The difference here, I think, is that her mother has a new husband that really doesn't like me.

 

[mistoffolees]

Practices, although I'm not seeing the distinction you are drawing. Can you elaborate? I'm interested in legal terms or sections of law that she may use in future custody issues.

There's no legal distinction between practices and performances. If it's a public place and open to the public, then anyone can attend. End of story.

 

[LdiJ]

Practices, although I'm not seeing the distinction you are drawing. Can you elaborate? I'm interested in legal terms or sections of law that she may use in future custody issues.

Some backstory;

My daughter has been going to gymnastics for several years now. She recently changed gyms. At the previous gyms I attended all of her practices/events. The difference here, I think, is that her mother has a new husband that really doesn't like me.

Misto gave you the correct answer. I was thinking more of practises where there really wasn't any place for spectators. When my daughter was in soccer they didn't encourage parents to stick around for practises because there really wasn't any place for spectators where they practised.

 

[stealth2]

I can tell you that it would be considered really strange for a parent to hang and watch their FH practice.

 

[mistoffolees]

I can tell you that it would be considered really strange for a parent to hang and watch their FH practice.

In my experience, it's really more the age of the child that determines that rather than the sport.

For very young kids, it's common to see bleachers or a room full of parents watching every minute of practice - whether it's T-ball, gymnastics, soccer, or dance. For older kids, not so much.

 

[stealth2]

I don't disagree, misto. But, in THIS thread, OP didn't tell us what age the child is.

 

[mistoffolees]

I don't disagree, misto. But, in THIS thread, OP didn't tell us what age the child is.

It really doesn't matter. If Dad wants to watch the child practice gymnastics, he's entitled to.

 

[olhobbes]

I don't disagree, misto. But, in THIS thread, OP didn't tell us what age the child is.

She's 7. But even were she 17, she asked me to be there. That's all I care about.

 

[Silverplum]

She's 7. But even were she 17, she asked me to be there. That's all I care about.

Of course. And you should go.