Father in Austrailia who hasn't spoken to child in 3 years refuses to give consent to ADHD meds

[tanasmom]

What is the name of your state? Texas
My 16 year old's father stopped talking to her and cut off all visitation in 2015 because she asked to live with me and see him every other weekend. (We had a 50/50 arrangement at the time). In 2016, he moved to Austrailia. It has now been 3 years since he's talked to her or seen her. She has always had anxiety and behavior problems and was diagnosed with ADHD at 6 years old. My ex husband refused to allow ADHD meds and got a court order to tell me not to give them to her at that time. I talk to his wife over Facebook messenger to keep her updated on my daughter's health and school because my daughter has Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and POTS and we both want to keep her connected with her 7 year old half sister. Lately, my daughter's ADHD has gotten worse. She's 40 lessons behind in her online school. I took her to the doctor and the doctor prescribed an ADHD medication. When my ex husband's wife told him this, he demanded she not take it. He hasn't seen her or talked to her in 3 years. He hasn't talked to her doctors. He's not involved in her schooling. He doesn't provide her medical insurance. He lives in Austrailia. Can he do this ? Can he legally object to her taking this medication ? And if so, what can I do ? Thanks.

 

[xylene]

You need a lawyer to review the CURRENT court order and see about getting it changed.

You seem to have several issues and the situation is complex. Is he an Australian citizen?

While I can see your intentions in keeping his current wife informed/involved, you really need to talk with your lawyer about that. My opinion is that this may be innapropriate, especially given his total unwillingness to be involved. That just sits funny.

 

[HighwayMan]

You need to really speak to a family law attorney in your area to get all the information you need.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Was the original order against the medication an emergency order? That is, on what basis was such an order granted?

Has she since changed drs?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? Texas
My 16 year old's father stopped talking to her and cut off all visitation in 2015 because she asked to live with me and see him every other weekend. (We had a 50/50 arrangement at the time). In 2016, he moved to Austrailia. It has now been 3 years since he's talked to her or seen her. She has always had anxiety and behavior problems and was diagnosed with ADHD at 6 years old. My ex husband refused to allow ADHD meds and got a court order to tell me not to give them to her at that time. I talk to his wife over Facebook messenger to keep her updated on my daughter's health and school because my daughter has Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and POTS and we both want to keep her connected with her 7 year old half sister. Lately, my daughter's ADHD has gotten worse. She's 40 lessons behind in her online school. I took her to the doctor and the doctor prescribed an ADHD medication. When my ex husband's wife told him this, he demanded she not take it. He hasn't seen her or talked to her in 3 years. He hasn't talked to her doctors. He's not involved in her schooling. He doesn't provide her medical insurance. He lives in Austrailia. Can he do this ? Can he legally object to her taking this medication ? And if so, what can I do ? Thanks.

Yes, you need to talk to an attorney ASAP. However, you should also act in the best interest of your daughter.

 

[t74]

In addition to an attorney, you need to speak with your child's psychiatrist/developmental pediatrician regarding the school situation. Online school might not be the best choice given the services available to disabled students (ADHD can qualify) in the public schools. Having had a child diagnosed with ADHD at 3, LD at 11, clinical depression at 19, sleep disorder at 30, ... I know that meds are not the cure all. The structure of a formal school program supplemented with special services can be a benefit for some ADHD children. Do not expect meds alone to solve the problems; the wrong meds may aggravate it.

 

[LdiJ]

In addition to an attorney, you need to speak with your child's psychiatrist/developmental pediatrician regarding the school situation. Online school might not be the best choice given the services available to disabled students (ADHD can qualify) in the public schools. Having had a child diagnosed with ADHD at 3, LD at 11, clinical depression at 19, sleep disorder at 30, ... I know that meds are not the cure all. The structure of a formal school program supplemented with special services can be a benefit for some ADHD children. Do not expect meds alone to solve the problems; the wrong meds may aggravate it.

And the right meds work wonders for many people with those diagnoses.

 

[eerelations]

While I don't know about Australians' attitude towards meds, I DO know that New Zealand is very much against most pharmaceuticals and in fact has many laws prohibiting the use of many/most pharmaceutical drugs. Pharmaceuticals in New Zealand are pretty much limited to antibiotics and other emergency life-saving medicines. (And food? Don't get me started on food in New Zealand! New Zealand food tastes totally different from food in North America because preservatives - including salt! - are all illegal. It's amazing how the lack of preservatives changes the taste of food. Amazing but oh-so-true.) It's possible that Australian attitudes are the same (or at least similar), and that's why ex is refusing to pay for pharmaceutical meds. 'Cause his new culture is telling him so. Not sure, just sayin'

 

[t74]

And the right meds work wonders for many people with those diagnoses.

But it may take years to find one that works - and then it may not be on the drug plan formulary and cost $1700 per month.

 

[LdiJ]

But it may take years to find one that works - and then it may not be on the drug plan formulary and cost $1700 per month.

Since he isn't paying anything for the child's support, that hardly is relevant.

 

[xylene]

None of the front line drugs for ADHD are 1700 a month.

 

[t74]

None of the front line drugs for ADHD are 1700 a month.

For ADHD compounded by bipolar disorder and ... After 37 years nothing else works. Until the child is tried on meds, no one knows if it will help. The skill of the prescribing physician is very important. In my area, pediatricians sometimes do not refer to a developmental pediatricians or a psychiatrist due to a shortage My experience with a general ped has been very bad.An annual physical is inadequate to monitor effectiveness especially with a growing teen.

 

[torimac]

Not legal advice but... I also have EDS and POTS. You will want to be careful because many ADHD meds will lower blood pressure and its not mentioned as a side affect because its not really considered a negative one. This will affect POTS a great deal. So make sure the doctor is aware of this.