father wants his parenting time back

[waking beauty]

massachusetts

my daughters father is asking for a remodification on our order asking for his parenting time back...his parenting time was taken away from him due to his abandonment of our child...he moved out of state to (texas) and never left us with any contact info nor did he advice the courts and the DOR of his move...he left for 5 months and hasnt paid support since end of may 1st week of june 2008 and hasnt had a job since end of april 2008...Not even a year ago, he swore to the courts that he was enrolled in an undisclosed school for the spring semester of 2008 and that he had a job and was living in a house with 2 roommates…well for the past 11 months he has lost over 3 jobs, has never attended any school, has been evicted from 3 houses, one for failure to pay rent, and the other for failure to pay rent and larceny of 2000 dollars, and was homeless for the last 2 weekends of July having our daughter sleep on his friends couches at different houses during his parenting times, he is also currently in arrears of over 2000 dollars, and he left the state of Massachusetts abandoning our daughter without making reasonable provisions for her support, and he never informed the courts or the DOR of his move and his address change…

i dont want the judge to remodify the order....i went to court on nov 4th and he never showed up to dispute...now he is here and asking them to give him back his visits...

I consistently prove to be the stable and responsible parent for our daughter…I have held the same job at a local drug and alcohol hospital for 5 years, my phone number has been the same for over 7 years, I have been living with my parents as of our separation in June of 2006, and I have been in school since 2004 steadily working toward my degree…our daughter needs the continuation of an honest stable home environment…

what do u think will happen? i kno the courts dont like to have a parent completely removed from a childs life and those are not my goals...but I feel I would be doing our daughter a disservice by allowing him to put our daughter in dangerous situations and to abandon his daughter anytime he felt like doing so…

help please and thank u for the help

 

[waking beauty]

 

[LdiJ]

Honestly, they are going to give him some type of visitation. Even if he had been missing for years, they would give him some type of visitation.

 

[Ohiogal]

I agree. He will have a chance to spend time with his child. The court will order that in some way, shape, or form.

 

[waking beauty]

but wouldnt they require him to take some sort of parenting classes? this behavior of his has been ongoing as he has never been able to provide her with the stability she needs...

my biggest fear are him having over night visits...like i said the last time he was given visits he had her sleeping on peoples couches because he again was evicted and he never told anyone of his being homeless....i wrote an affidavit asking the judge to not remodify what another judge granted me on nov 4th....here it goes....

Your Honor, Mr. S is an unstable and unreliable parent…
Not even a year ago, Mr. S swore to the courts that he was enrolled in an undisclosed school for the spring semester of 2008 and that he had a job and was living in a house with 2 roommates…well for the past 11 months Mr. S has lost over 3 jobs, has never attended any school, has been evicted from 3 houses one for failure to pay rent and the other for failure to pay rent and larceny over 2000 dollars, and was homeless for the last 2 weekends of July having our daughter sleep on his friends couches at different houses during his parenting times, he is also currently in arrears of over 2000 dollars, and he left the state of Massachusetts abandoning our daughter without making reasonable provisions for her support, and he never informed the courts or the DOR of his move and his address change…

Mr. S never tried to make any contact with our daughter while he was away…he never wrote any letter nor was there a phone call for her…the one time he did call was on September 10, 2008…he called our daughters school and spoke to the director of the program who informed him that she would not put our daughter on the phone with him…Mr. S then informed her that he was currently living in California and was never coming back…

Your Honor I consistently prove to be the stable supportive responsible and nurturing parent for our daughter…I have held the same job at ____ hospital for 5 years, my phone number has been the same for over 7 years, I have been living with my parents as of our separation in June of 2006, and I have been in school since 2004 steadily working toward my degree…our daughter needs the continuation of an honest stable home environment…

Furthermore your honor I have included sworn witness statements from Mr. S’s former roommate and landlord Brian D, who as u may recall wrote a letter on Mr. S’s behalf back in December 2007…I have a formal written incident report detailing the phone call Mr. S made to our daughters school claiming he was living in California and was never coming back…I also included a letter from my job confirming I have been employed with the hospital for 5 years and I have my phone records stating I have had the same phone number for over 7 years…I also have records from the DOR affirming that they did try to contact Mr. S at 1801 oak edge drive, ____TX

Mr. S is an unstable, dishonest, irresponsible man and he has blatantly lied and withheld information from the courts and the DOR…his poor judgment and disregard for our daughters safety, his constant loosing of jobs, his being evicted from his apartments, and now his moving out of state to an undisclosed location demonstrate this…the stability that Mr. S promises the courts has continued to be unproven and unlikely to last…his lack of honesty, responsibility, and stability are detrimental to our daughters well being…I feel I would be doing our daughter a disservice by allowing Mr. S to put our daughter in dangerous situations and to abandon his daughter anytime he felt like doing so…

On the contrary to what Mr. S claims on his sworn affidavit, he did receive notice to appear in court on November 4th…I published it in the telegram and gazette and I sent certified mail to his previous known address as was directed to me by the courts…Mr. S did inform me that he would possibly be moving to Texas due to his license being revoked for 5 years and other legal matters…prior to Mr. S leaving, in the first week of August Brian D, Mr. S’s former landlord and roommate, informed me that he had evicted Mr. S and he was homeless and had our daughter sleeping on a friends couch during his parenting times for over 2 weeks…after receiving this information I decided it would not be safe for our daughter to have visits with him as he was homeless and had been lying to me claiming he was still living at his Dudley residence going as far as to allow me to drop her off to that residence without informing me that he no longer lived there which in turn meant our daughter was homeless while she was in his custody…in fact Mr. S was only meeting me at that residence and once I left he’d leave with our daughter as he no longer lived there…the first week of august Mr. S made an attempt to arrange picking up our daughter and I told him that given the circumstances I would not be allowing our daughter to spend that time with him… at that point I asked for his new address and he gave me a Texas address which was 1801 oak edge drive, ____ TX… he explained that he was going to be leaving that week and wanted his overnight with her and when I refused to send our daughter out with a homeless man he responded by saying “F--- you, you C---! Find her a new father”…now your Honor the address he gave me is not the address that he mentions on his SWORN affidavit…once I received this address I reported it to the DOR, as Mr. S was quite delinquent in his child support payments…the DOR then got back to me and explained that they ran his social security number through a search engine to search for any activity…they also sent a letter to the above address and Mr. S was not located, I also have records from the DOR affirming that they did try to contact Mr. S at 1801 oak edge drive, ___TX…Mr. S is claiming to have enrolled in college…doesn’t that require a social security number? The DOR would have found him if he was enrolled in school…I would like for Mr. S to provide some form of official transcript or financial statements proving he was indeed enrolled in this college…I looked this college up and it is a highly educated medical school…Mr. S has not taken any college courses and as someone who has been in school, for 5 years steadily working towards a nursing degree, I know the requirements and Mr. S doesn’t not meet those course requirements…Mr. S also claims to have been working day labor to earn his way back to Massachusetts if this is to be true, as he swears it to be, then that tells me that Mr. S was working illegally because otherwise the DOR would have found him and taken out delinquent child support payments…

Mr. S is a liar and a con man…he lies to me and has blatantly lied to the courts in his sworn affidavit…I request that the courts do a full CORI check on Mr. S…he has numerous counts of fraud, larceny charges, and his license has been revoked for 5 years…I feel this information is crucial in establishing Mr. S’s credibility

I request that the courts do not re-modify the order and allow the current judgment that Judge Denise Meagher ruled on November 4, 2008 to stand as that is what is in the best interest of our daughter


does that sound ok? we have been going into courts for a long time and this is just the final straw...i dont want to take his visiting rights away from her but its my duty as a mother to protect her from forces of evil and dangerous situations even if it is her father...he really needs to get his life in order...i just dont kno what to do...im at my wits ends

 

[waking beauty]

dont they take consistency and stability and whats best for the child into account? this is a man who is in her life for 4 months then leaves for 5 months then comes back for a few months then leaves again...leaving me to pick up the pieces...he abandonded her financially physically and emotionally yet wants to be allowed to come in and out of her life? hes been homeless 3 times this year alone...what about supervised visits? another thing is his license has been revoked for 5 years and when he was allowed visits with her hed still drive with her in the car....i just dont kno what to do...i dont think its in her best interest to be with him at this time...he needs to get his life in order...he needs to take care of himself before he can care for our daughter

thanks again

 

[Ohiogal]

dont they take consistency and stability and whats best for the child into account? this is a man who is in her life for 4 months then leaves for 5 months then comes back for a few months then leaves again...leaving me to pick up the pieces...he abandonded her financially physically and emotionally yet wants to be allowed to come in and out of her life? hes been homeless 3 times this year alone...what about supervised visits? another thing is his license has been revoked for 5 years and when he was allowed visits with her hed still drive with her in the car....i just dont kno what to do...i dont think its in her best interest to be with him at this time...he needs to get his life in order...he needs to take care of himself before he can care for our daughter

thanks again

The judge is NOT going to read the letter you wrote. Make your arguments in court. Dad will still get visitation. It may be gradual or supervised to start with but he will get visitation.

 

[waking beauty]

i understand what ur saying...but i guess its not going to hearing...its a 2-99 which i was told meant she would read my affidavit and would read his affidavit (which his doesnt say anything about having an apartment or anything stablie in his life) so she will read my answer to his affidavit...based on that what do u think?

 

[Just Blue]

In Massachusetts 5 months is NOT abandonment in a legal sense.

 

[waking beauty]

so what do u think the outcome will be? everything in his affidavit that he wrote is a lie and i have numerous documents proving so...will this not count for anything? his new address (which now makes that house # 5 this year) is 25 or more minutes away from me...do u think the judge will allow for supervised visits for a while then revisit the case at a later date?

 

[Just Blue]

so what do u think the outcome will be? everything in his affidavit that he wrote is a lie and i have numerous documents proving so...will this not count for anything? his new address (which now makes that house # 5 this year) is 25 or more minutes away from me...do u think the judge will allow for supervised visits for a while then revisit the case at a later date?

I thought you said he was not in Texas??

Perhaps the Judge would order supervised a SHORT period of supervised visitation. But unless you have HARD PROOF the he is a danger to the child supervision will be minimal. Aprx 2 to 6 months.

BTW: His housing situation is not an issue unless he is living with convicted child molesters. Your daughters primary home is with you and she will be minimally affected by this issue.

 

[waking beauty]

I thought you said he was not in Texas??

Perhaps the Judge would order supervised a SHORT period of supervised visitation. But unless you have HARD PROOF the he is a danger to the child supervision will be minimal. Aprx 2 to 6 months.

BTW: His housing situation is not an issue unless he is living with convicted child molesters. Your daughters primary home is with you and she will be minimally affected by this issue.

right hes not in texas...he just came back here and now all of a sudden is living with another person...but he was living in texas for 5 months prior to 2 weeks ago...

my hard proof is that back in july 2006 he was involved in a drunk driving accident with our daughter, the vehicle was totaled, and i reported his neglect to DSS...after this incident he didnt have visits with her for a while as he was in and out of her life...then finally in dec 2007 they granted him some over night visits..that lasted for about 3 months until he was evicted from his apartment...he was homeless for a month or so then moved into another apartment which he shared with 2 other roommates...he was doing fine 5 or 6 months into it (or so i was led to believe) then his landlord told me that he had evicted him due to theft and failure to pay rent (for the whole time he was living there) his ladnlord also told me he witnessed parties going on at the house where smoking and drinking was involved...her father would leave her in the custody of his neighbors 13 and 14 yr old sons while he "went out"...so in the last 2 weeks of july her father was evicted from his apartment again and was homeless...he never told me this nor did he tell the courts...so id drop our daughter off too him for her visits and hed take her to go sleep on friends couches...i also found out that he had been driving with her while his license is revoked for 5 years and that he continues to be involved in criminal activity**************

i requested the courts do a backround check on him because i feel that is vital in establishing his credibility...he has over 13 counts of fraud that i kno of in the pasy 2 years...doesnt this count for anything in the courts eyes?

i have sworn witness statements about all of these incidents...is this not considered hard proof of his being a danger to our daughter inthe courts eyes?


(and im sorry for this long thread, my court date is coming soon and i just want to think of all possibilities) thank u for ur help as well...i appreciate it greatly!!

 

[ProSeDadinMD]

my hard proof is that back in july 2006 he was involved in a drunk driving accident with our daughter, the vehicle was totaled, and i reported his neglect to DSS.....i also found out that he had been driving with her while his license is revoked for 5 years and that he continues to be involved in criminal activity**************

Ok, I'm just gonna ask. How did he not end up in jail for this? Or are we fabricating stories to make Dad look bad?

If he's involved in criminal activities, report it and have him arrested. Oh, what's that? No proof? Then it doesn't matter...

 

[waking beauty]

Ok, I'm just gonna ask. How did he not end up in jail for this? Or are we fabricating stories to make Dad look bad?

If he's involved in criminal activities, report it and have him arrested. Oh, what's that? No proof? Then it doesn't matter...

i try to explain this to the judge all the time!! im not fabricating anything and i ask the same questions u do as well...his criminal activity involves fraud and larceny and he was arrested on drug charges,....he stole numerous things from his most recent apartment...his landlord did sue him for 2000 and won but the landlord never pressed criminal charges on him, yet at least...i dont need to fabricate anything to make him look bad...he does a fine job on his own...

as far as his driving with no license, i did tell this to the judge...problem is, is if he shows up to pick her up and hes not driving i have to give him our daughter...but i kno he still drives with her after im not around...and for that i have the sworn statement from his ladnlord...as far as his drunk driving i did report that to DSS and i have brought it up in court before but the judge tells me that it was in the past and it has no relevance??? as far as his criminal activity goes theres plenty of proof...all they have to do is a full CORI check which i have asked them to do to prove my accusations, but they havent done one...i dont kno what to do...i was hoping that with him leaving the state for 5 months with no contact, and his failure to pay support for 6 months, and his being homeless 3 times this year alone, and his constant being evicted from house to house and dishonesty would help my case but i dont kno...

i mean whats it going to take? for him to get into another accident? or for her to get molested when he decides to leave her in the care of another set of teen boys? or for him to just up and leave the state again? weve gone to court quite a few times this year...i hope this time will be the "straw that broke the camels back" u kno? again any advice and insight is greatly appreciated no matter how grim it may sound...just please no insults..i came here looking for help

 

[ProSeDadinMD]

Actually, I meant how did he get out of a drunk driving accident(with your child in the car) while driving n a revoked license? Considering that you're saying that he is STILL driving on a revoked license, I am guessing(not assuming, or taking it as apparent) that his license was revoked at the time of the accident.

How old is the child?