C
Corday
Guest
What is the name of your state? TEXAS
My son, age 17, walked out Oct. 26, 2004 to avoid a grounding for lying about where he had been and coming home past curfew. On his bicycle, with a backpack, he moved in with a family that has no house rules, and is now engaged in doing whatever he pleases, whenever. I've had no contact with him since he left. I thought the family he went to would counsel him to go home, but they not only welcomed him without question, they seem to be the ones who encouraged him to leave home. A week ago, this entire family was infected with scabbies, covered with sores and waiting for some sort of "check" in order to buy the prescription medicine they needed. They wouldn't have done anything about their sores, except that the mother had chest pains one night, went to ER, and was diagnosed with scabbies and given a written prescription with a warning to "act now."
Since he left, my son no longer goes to school. He's having sexual relations with a 15-year-old girl (black clothes, multi-hued hair) in her mother's home - this is why he left home. He had lied about being with her when there was no need to lie - he wasn't forbidden to "date" her, but "dating" is not what they do. He's so obsessed with "being with" her that he broke curfew that night and got caught, showing a dangerous loss of all self-control.
My son has a $4.45 per hour busboy job, about 15 hours a week. His house key (to our home) is floating around I know not where, as he claims he lost it, so I expect him to come back when I'm not home, with friends, to cart away his computer, 2 TV's, DVD player, VCR, 3 video game consoles, video games, movies and CD's, but not his poor cat who has moped in loneliness since he left, or his beta fish whose bowl I am "too chicken" to clean (I tried, but...eeek). I'm not worried about "the stuff," I just can't understand why he'd walk out on it, he played with his "toys" all the time, took many years accumulating and "setting up" his electronics. He adored that cat, and at 16 he begged for that fish.
The police in Galveston tell me that because he's 17, he is "a free man." But I see in Title 6 Crimes Against the Family Chapter 25 of the Texas penal code, that he has to be 18 to leave home without parental consent, and that those who harbor him are committing a criminal act. I further see (Internet searches) that this has been amended to say "unless the child is 17" but that amendment was signed as "effective 1999." The version that says a child must be 18 is signed "effective September 1, 2003." Also, everything on the internet says that in Texas you have to go to school from age 6 until your 18th birthday.
There is a hitch in our case: my son has been home schooled since 5th grade. He was set to graduate with a valid home school diploma in May, 2005. He was doing great and has always been ecstatic with the home school situation; it was at his pleading that I took him out of school, where he was suddenly failing, teachers "ordering" me since kindergarten to "put him on Ritalin" even though he never, ever, had a behavior problem. He was never short on "socialization" and friends and activities, he is and has always been extremely busy and active, keeping all his friends and always making more friends, never moody, never erratic, a little argumentative on occasion, but never a disciplinary problem for me or anyone else. All the adults we know are crazy about him, they can't believe how great he is.
Without sleep or preparation, he made a 43 on the ASVAB about a month ago, under supervision during the official "delayed entry" process. He has yearned since age 12 to be an Army Ranger or get into Special Forces. The Army shocked him by rejecting his ASVAB score as "too low" (he needed a 50) for a home-schooler (home school is considered no better than GED, we found out at the 11th hour). He also learned, while being processed, that he is five-foot-six. He had thought for 2 years that he was five-foot-seven and getting ever-taller. He thought he was five-nine by now. All of this was devastating for him, though I was (secretly) relieved out of my mind at the Army's rejection, because I've been afraid he would end up NOT in Special Forces, too late to save himself, and devastated by THAT.
I'm sorry this letter is so long. The fact is, my son is operating under a crushing disappointment, tearing his life apart, escaping into "endless fun" without regard for anything or anyone, and Texas law seems to have stamped this horror with its engraved-in-stone dispassionate approval. Can you help us (or me, I guess) with a verdict as to whether at 17 he can leave home, quit home school, and be harbored by adults who know he left without permission, people who are in effect supporting (feeding?) him without restricting his comings and goings in any way?
The "Dad" of this family is purportedly hiding out from an old child support obligation in New Mexico, but he is the least culpable in my situation, a trucker who is rarely home.
Thank you,
Carly Corday
My son, age 17, walked out Oct. 26, 2004 to avoid a grounding for lying about where he had been and coming home past curfew. On his bicycle, with a backpack, he moved in with a family that has no house rules, and is now engaged in doing whatever he pleases, whenever. I've had no contact with him since he left. I thought the family he went to would counsel him to go home, but they not only welcomed him without question, they seem to be the ones who encouraged him to leave home. A week ago, this entire family was infected with scabbies, covered with sores and waiting for some sort of "check" in order to buy the prescription medicine they needed. They wouldn't have done anything about their sores, except that the mother had chest pains one night, went to ER, and was diagnosed with scabbies and given a written prescription with a warning to "act now."
Since he left, my son no longer goes to school. He's having sexual relations with a 15-year-old girl (black clothes, multi-hued hair) in her mother's home - this is why he left home. He had lied about being with her when there was no need to lie - he wasn't forbidden to "date" her, but "dating" is not what they do. He's so obsessed with "being with" her that he broke curfew that night and got caught, showing a dangerous loss of all self-control.
My son has a $4.45 per hour busboy job, about 15 hours a week. His house key (to our home) is floating around I know not where, as he claims he lost it, so I expect him to come back when I'm not home, with friends, to cart away his computer, 2 TV's, DVD player, VCR, 3 video game consoles, video games, movies and CD's, but not his poor cat who has moped in loneliness since he left, or his beta fish whose bowl I am "too chicken" to clean (I tried, but...eeek). I'm not worried about "the stuff," I just can't understand why he'd walk out on it, he played with his "toys" all the time, took many years accumulating and "setting up" his electronics. He adored that cat, and at 16 he begged for that fish.
The police in Galveston tell me that because he's 17, he is "a free man." But I see in Title 6 Crimes Against the Family Chapter 25 of the Texas penal code, that he has to be 18 to leave home without parental consent, and that those who harbor him are committing a criminal act. I further see (Internet searches) that this has been amended to say "unless the child is 17" but that amendment was signed as "effective 1999." The version that says a child must be 18 is signed "effective September 1, 2003." Also, everything on the internet says that in Texas you have to go to school from age 6 until your 18th birthday.
There is a hitch in our case: my son has been home schooled since 5th grade. He was set to graduate with a valid home school diploma in May, 2005. He was doing great and has always been ecstatic with the home school situation; it was at his pleading that I took him out of school, where he was suddenly failing, teachers "ordering" me since kindergarten to "put him on Ritalin" even though he never, ever, had a behavior problem. He was never short on "socialization" and friends and activities, he is and has always been extremely busy and active, keeping all his friends and always making more friends, never moody, never erratic, a little argumentative on occasion, but never a disciplinary problem for me or anyone else. All the adults we know are crazy about him, they can't believe how great he is.
Without sleep or preparation, he made a 43 on the ASVAB about a month ago, under supervision during the official "delayed entry" process. He has yearned since age 12 to be an Army Ranger or get into Special Forces. The Army shocked him by rejecting his ASVAB score as "too low" (he needed a 50) for a home-schooler (home school is considered no better than GED, we found out at the 11th hour). He also learned, while being processed, that he is five-foot-six. He had thought for 2 years that he was five-foot-seven and getting ever-taller. He thought he was five-nine by now. All of this was devastating for him, though I was (secretly) relieved out of my mind at the Army's rejection, because I've been afraid he would end up NOT in Special Forces, too late to save himself, and devastated by THAT.
I'm sorry this letter is so long. The fact is, my son is operating under a crushing disappointment, tearing his life apart, escaping into "endless fun" without regard for anything or anyone, and Texas law seems to have stamped this horror with its engraved-in-stone dispassionate approval. Can you help us (or me, I guess) with a verdict as to whether at 17 he can leave home, quit home school, and be harbored by adults who know he left without permission, people who are in effect supporting (feeding?) him without restricting his comings and goings in any way?
The "Dad" of this family is purportedly hiding out from an old child support obligation in New Mexico, but he is the least culpable in my situation, a trucker who is rarely home.
Thank you,
Carly Corday
