gov't withheld child support and where it belongs

[Zephyr]

Kind of a sticky situation... when I was 13, my parents divorced and I left Michigan with my mother, and my father was ordered, of course, to pay child support. We all agreed that automatic withholding was the way to go. The problem was with Friend of the Court - they were withholding the correct amount from his paychecks, all right - but not paying us the correct amount in turn. We would get bits and pieces at a time, checks for odd small amounts and oftentimes no checks at all. We couldn't fight it very well, where we moved was roughly 800 miles away from Michigan, and we held very little clout. The child support was to end on my 18th birthday or when I finished school, whichever was latest.
During that period of 5 years, I was living with my mother only partially (a direct violation of the custody and CS agreements), as she would kick me out and/or move out of state as she saw fit, leaving me, a minor at the time, to fend for myself. She was also collecting my child support during this time.
I am now 19, and there is no doubt the CS account has been closed by now. Do I have any right (or way) to order an audit of the account and to receive the difference of the amount collected and the amount paid out (which is no doubt a rather large sum since it spanned the entire 5 years), or does that automatically happen when the account is closed? And is there anything I can do about collecting the money that my mother essentially stole from me? I have plenty of witnesses to account for her leaving and my not receiving any support.
And the big question, if my mother has already ordered an audit and RECEIVED that money, Is there anything I can do from there??

 

[LadyBlu]

Kind of a sticky situation... when I was 13, my parents divorced and I left Michigan with my mother, and my father was ordered, of course, to pay child support. We all agreed that automatic withholding was the way to go. The problem was with Friend of the Court - they were withholding the correct amount from his paychecks, all right - but not paying us the correct amount in turn. We would get bits and pieces at a time, checks for odd small amounts and oftentimes no checks at all. We couldn't fight it very well, where we moved was roughly 800 miles away from Michigan, and we held very little clout. The child support was to end on my 18th birthday or when I finished school, whichever was latest.
During that period of 5 years, I was living with my mother only partially (a direct violation of the custody and CS agreements), as she would kick me out and/or move out of state as she saw fit, leaving me, a minor at the time, to fend for myself. She was also collecting my child support during this time.
I am now 19, and there is no doubt the CS account has been closed by now. Do I have any right (or way) to order an audit of the account and to receive the difference of the amount collected and the amount paid out (which is no doubt a rather large sum since it spanned the entire 5 years), or does that automatically happen when the account is closed? And is there anything I can do about collecting the money that my mother essentially stole from me? I have plenty of witnesses to account for her leaving and my not receiving any support.
And the big question, if my mother has already ordered an audit and RECEIVED that money, Is there anything I can do from there??

The child is not the obligee in a child support case. The CP has to enforce the support and is able to spend it as theysee fit unless previously ordered by a judge. You are not able to collect any monies not paid, nor are you legally able to have any of it. It is payable to your mother, for your upkeep. If you were not living with your mother you should have notified the courts or your father at that time to have the order for support changed.

 

[Zephyr]

My father knew about it, and didn't care. As long as it was being taken out of his check, he felt he was absolved.

And when my mother moved out of state, she moved back in with him. I had no way of contacting the courts, as she had all the records.

 

[LadyBlu]

My father knew about it, and didn't care. As long as it was being taken out of his check, he felt he was absolved.

And when my mother moved out of state, she moved back in with him. I had no way of contacting the courts, as she had all the records.

If you go through some of the previous posts regarding adult children wanting to collect unpaid child support you will probably understand better.

I know it is hard to accept and it seems like you have had to deal with alot at such a young age. For that I am sorry, all children should be loved and nurtured, it makes for healthy, well adjusted adults.

May I suggest that you chalk this one up to a learning experience and try to make something better of yourself then obviously your parents did? That would be the ultimate revenge.. I know.. I have been there and done that.. *S*

Remember, that which does not kill us, makes us stronger.

Good Luck and Happy Holidays.

 

[Zephyr]

If what you are saying is true, that is ONE screwed up system. I've heard countless times about CPs receiving CS and blowing it on numerous things (none of which are to the benefit of the child) while living in a rat trap of a home and the child suffers. We're all the time trying to counsel children when their parents divorce, assuring them that the divorce is 'not their fault', but how are the courts backing that up? It was never the child's choice to be brought into this world.
I understand as well that you can't give CS directly TO the child, as it would probably be misused the same way... but if they can have government programs like food stamps where the benefits HAVE to be used as they're directed to be used, can't the same system for child support be put into place? Or have gov't mediators of some kind assuring that? When will the kids stop having to pay for the mistakes of the parents??
If only I, like LadyBlu, could adopt a happy-go-lucky, 'suck it up and deal with it' attitude. But I'm forced to grasp at straws because of the current situation that whole ordeal got me into. I don't need counsel on my outlook on life.
And people wonder why kids go nuts and shoot up their own houses.

 

[LadyBlu]

If what you are saying is true, that is ONE screwed up system. I've heard countless times about CPs receiving CS and blowing it on numerous things (none of which are to the benefit of the child) while living in a rat trap of a home and the child suffers. We're all the time trying to counsel children when their parents divorce, assuring them that the divorce is 'not their fault', but how are the courts backing that up? It was never the child's choice to be brought into this world.
I understand as well that you can't give CS directly TO the child, as it would probably be misused the same way... but if they can have government programs like food stamps where the benefits HAVE to be used as they're directed to be used, can't the same system for child support be put into place? Or have gov't mediators of some kind assuring that? When will the kids stop having to pay for the mistakes of the parents??
If only I, like LadyBlu, could adopt a happy-go-lucky, 'suck it up and deal with it' attitude. But I'm forced to grasp at straws because of the current situation that whole ordeal got me into. I don't need counsel on my outlook on life.
And people wonder why kids go nuts and shoot up their own houses.

I really did try to be nice to you... I have no idea why you chose to go on the attack, but from previous expereience it usually means that you are in a *My problems are everybody elses fault mode*.

May I suggest that if you are going to be an adult youlearn that first of all, things happen in life, some things you can change and unfortunately some things you cannot.
You cannot change your childhood, you cannot regain years lost, you cannot regain money that was not yours, and you cannot make some people be parents.

That is not our fault, neither is it yours, but there is nothing you can do about it now, so you accept it, deal with it and move on. Blaming society as a whole for teens that have anger management problems is not the answer. If you go out and try to shoot up a place of business or kill your parents, guess what? You are responsible, you will do time.. it is called accountability.

I suggest that if you wish to survive in life you learn to pick and choose your battles a little more wisely, and accept that there are some things you cannot change.. and history is one of them.