Grandchildren

[EllaBlue]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? New Hampshire

Why is it that the management can limit the days per week that my grandson can visit me? I live in elderly disabled housing. My grandson is going on 12 years old. He is GREAT company during the summer and I love to spend as much time with him as I can. I have lived in housing before and this was NEVER a problem. Actually they encouraged family to spend time together.

I can understand why we could not run daycares here. That is NOT the case with me, but if my grandson were to be dropped off each afternoon, every day for our visit, that IS considered babysitting???

This is what is wrong with the world. They are trying to keep families apart!
What should I do?
Thank you
P.S I am willing to move over this. I cannot imagine tellling my sweet grandboy that our time is limited together. I am on disability, and this boy is good company and good for me!

Thank you

 

[Banned_Princess]

The management has no right whatsoever to limit your visitors, and your grandson is just that... They will have a hard time evicting you for it. If you have a lease. Even if he is staying the weekend. (the whole summer sleeping over is a different matter, but if you can have the boy dropped off every day, that would be best) AND it would only be babysitting if you are being paid for it.

In the future, when signing a lease tell them, and get it in your lease that it is A O K for grandson to spend extended times staying with you.

If you aren't on a lease, move out with proper notice, to a friendlier community.

 

[DeenaCA]

Is the housing subsidized? If so, do you know which housing program it is (for example, public housing, Section 8 project-based, etc.)? I may be able to direct you to a local field office for help.

The previous poster is correct in that the rule is unreasonable.

 

[atomizer]

Not everyone at your age appreciates the companionship of children. If you are renting a room at an elderly home or share a room with another person then yes, they can set rules for, hours, and frequency of visitation. Exactly kind of organization are you renting from?

 

[Banned_Princess]

Not everyone at your age appreciates the companionship of children. If you are renting a room at an elderly home or share a room with another person then yes, they can set rules for, hours, and frequency of visitation. Exactly kind of organization are you renting from?

If its not in the lease, it doesnt matter who doesnt like it.

As in, no they cant.

 

[EllaBlue]

Thanks Princess. I have a lease, but we can move with a 30 day notice here. They give us this "Community Rule" book, and in that it says what I posted about. My grandson sleeps over every other Sat. and during school vacation, I DO love to have him as often as I can. Which, can be EVERY day if I get lucky He gets dropped off around 7am and is picked up by about 3pm. Geeesh, you would think they would WANT us to be with family.

I REALLY appreciate your feedback. A former landlady of mine, who I became friends with said to me "LET them PROVE IT!". I mean what are they going to do film it? Have other tenants rat me out. Although we do have a few busy bodies that LOVE, love to tell on others.

You can imagine how upset I have been. I will just have my boy come over and if they give me a notice of evict, I guess I will have to see what the judge says.
In the meantime, I am going to put my name into another place.
Thanks again. If you can think of anything else please let me know..

 

[EllaBlue]

Hey everyone, I just saw the other replies so thank you everyone

I live in an elderly disabled apartment complex. HUD told me that they CAN set their own set of Community Rules???? That really surprised me. I cannot IMAGINE any judge throwing me out for this.

It makes me really sad. I am 54, disabled and as I said, that boy is such a source of my JOY! No matter what kind of day I am having he surely can cheer me up. I have Lupus and I have some really bad days. They told me to go to HIS house for half of the week. I cannot always drive due to my dizzy spells so that is out.

I am a bit worried that they will hassle me

 

[atomizer]

Hey everyone, I just saw the other replies so thank you everyone

I live in an elderly disabled apartment complex. HUD told me that they CAN set their own set of Community Rules???? That really surprised me. I cannot IMAGINE any judge throwing me out for this.

It makes me really sad. I am 54, disabled and as I said, that boy is such a source of my JOY! No matter what kind of day I am having he surely can cheer me up. I have Lupus and I have some really bad days. They told me to go to HIS house for half of the week. I cannot always drive due to my dizzy spells so that is out.

I am a bit worried that they will hassle me

Senior housing are exempt from HUD Regulations. Your leasing agreement should contain rules of visitation. or, they could have been included in the rules packet that was handed to you when you moved in.

 

[Banned_Princess]

Hey everyone, I just saw the other replies so thank you everyone

I live in an elderly disabled apartment complex. HUD told me that they CAN set their own set of Community Rules???? That really surprised me. I cannot IMAGINE any judge throwing me out for this.

It makes me really sad. I am 54, disabled and as I said, that boy is such a source of my JOY! No matter what kind of day I am having he surely can cheer me up. I have Lupus and I have some really bad days. They told me to go to HIS house for half of the week. I cannot always drive due to my dizzy spells so that is out.

I am a bit worried that they will hassle me

If you are willing to move, and you are not obligated to stay, do so.

 

[DeenaCA]

The federal regulations are different for different types of subsidized housing. Yes, housing providers may establish "house rules". In federally-subsidized housing, the rules must be reasonable.

I don't know which housing program applies to your development, but here's an excerpt on house rules from HUD Handbook 4350.3, which covers HUD "Multifamily" programs:

House rules must:
a. Be related to the safety, care, and cleanliness of the building or
the safety and comfort of the tenants;

Owners, however, must be careful not to
develop restrictive rules that limit the freedom of tenants. If owners
develop house rules for a property, these rules must be consistent with
HUD requirements for operating HUD subsidized projects, must be
reasonable, and must not infringe on tenants' civil rights.

You can review the handbook at http://www.hud.gov/offices/adm/hudclips/handbooks/hsgh/4350.3/43503HSGH.pdf. This may not be the correct specific reference for your development, but there are similar giudelines for other HUD-subsidized properties.

If the managers serve you with any kind of lease violation notice, you should follow any appeal/grievance procedures described in the notice. Contact HUD again if the managers take any enforcement action based on your grandson's visits.

 

[EllaBlue]

I know that HUD said they can set their own rules as I said, BUT if it does infringe on my civil rights, and I will have to research that more, I would think they would have a difficult time with this.

I want it to go away but it won't.

Can I ask another question. IF another tenant reports me, how can they "prove" it. The ladies here DO gossip terribly, I have never seen anything quite like it.

How can they prove he did not come and go on a specific day? Is "heresay" allowed when dealing with evictions. I feel like writing a letter to one of the owners who is ABOVE the manager and also doing a public "letter to the editor" in our local newspaper. I think they should hang their heads in shame!

I am just a grammy trying to have my family close to me. My mom and dad are passed away, my daughter is far away and well.....my grandboy and I are VERY close and we have such a good time. I think with his mom away it is really important that I show a positive female role in his life as well as being his grammy. Kids are so darn special!! Thank you again. I was feeling pretty lost before I found this site.

 

[atomizer]

They don't have to prove anything if you are a month to month renter. All they have to do is give you a 30 day notice. My guess is that when you posted that you have a lease, you meant you have a monthly agreement contract.

 

[DeenaCA]

They don't have to prove anything if you are a month to month renter. All they have to do is give you a 30 day notice.

OP, I'm still not sure whether you live in a subsidized development. If you do, your tenancy can only be terminated for serious or repeated lease violations, such as criminal activity or negligent damage to the unit. It's doubtful that your grandson's visits would rise to that level for HUD housing.

 

[EllaBlue]

Let's PRAY, that they do NOT take this to a serious level "violation."
I also heard that I cannot put out a lawn chair. I have to ask management about that. I cannot be in the sun due to my Lupus so hopefully I can put a chair out back in the shade...

 

[Searchertwin]

Let's PRAY, that they do NOT take this to a serious level "violation."
I also heard that I cannot put out a lawn chair. I have to ask management about that. I cannot be in the sun due to my Lupus so hopefully I can put a chair out back in the shade...

Sorry to hear about the situation. It's a shame the way people are. I see no harm in the grandchild but it only takes one "busybody" to ruin it.
I personally would continue having him till something is done in WRITING and than address it from there. Before this happens, have a few neighbors sign a petition that the boy does not bother them in any way. Have mom sign a statement indicating that her son is only visiting occasionally and is not being paid. State this is not a place for son to live, he has his own housing. You indicate that he is not breaking any rules. You are allowed guest, this is family, which is also allowed. THAN send all this to the manage who is over their heads as you stated. But I wouldn't do all this till something is said in WRITING.
But as Banned Princess stated, "the whole summer sleeping over is a different matter," This is where they WILL get you. So be careful.
For your sake, I hope this all goes away...good luck...