What is the name of your state? Texas
(I have had to cut this in two parts because I wrote too much since I was trying to be thorough, please read on to the second part, thks)
Hi there, I hope somebody can help out here before this situation gets even worse, as it seems to keep doing.
In a nut shell, my husband has been affected by vicious, untrue comments about him. These comments have come from parents (two) of some of the members of the basketball team he and I coached during the summer. Our original intention was to raise enough money for the team and their parents to attend Nationals in Florida this past July. For several reasons this trip did not happen and the money was just recently spent on equipment which was distributed to all 9 girls. We, my husband and I, as coaches, did not have access to the money, the treasurer, an uncle from one of the team members volunteered and he was the only one with access to it. (I will explain in detail below) The process of us buying equipment and distributing it was slow, yes, for various personal reasons, but some of the parents believe that we "stole" the money or used it and then replaced it without their knowledge. Because of this, they went to my husband's boss (the school Principal) and even threatened to go to the School Board or the Superintendant. However, the worst comment that we have heard so far has been that he kept the money (about $2600) and spent it to get drunk and buy drugs. That is absolutely ridiculous and malicious. Neither one of us drinks, smokes, or much less do drugs. This rumor has spread throughout his school and now he will not be named Athletic Coordinator any more. All we tried to do was give these underprivileged girls an opportunity at a great experience and it has now been hell and then some. Please, please, somebody help us figure out what we can do in this situation. Thank you in advance to those who post.
More detailed explanation:
I have been a volunteer assistant basketball coach since October. My husband works at the school where these girls (9, from 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade) attend. He works there as a Physical Education aid, but has all his credentials to be a head coach, there just haven't been positions available. Anyways, the school year was great for him as he was named Athletic Coordinator and his original basketball team (7 of these 9 girls + 5 others). They finished the season as the undefeated City Champions in their division and were then invited to participate in other tournaments, which had nothing to do with the school or the district for that matter. After attending a couple of these, the opportunity of attending Nationals arose and we told the parents who were very interested. AT first everything was great, all the parents got along, fund raising was done cooperatively and the focus was on the girls, as it should've always been. Now, I should say that in the meantime, both my husband and I made all arrangements and sent all payments to attend these tournaments and upcoming ones as well. The fees were payed by either the parents or by funds collected through fundraising. We had regular meetings which went well. Obviously, some parents helped more than others, but this was forseen. In one of these meetings, we decided that someone had to be responsible for the money. One of the parents, who later we found out is one of the two who have made these comments, was offered the position of Treasurer, and she declined. So, Mr. Z, an uncle of one of the girls volunteered and all of those present agreed. His sister (the mom of the girl) has been very involved in this whole organization and fundraising efforts.
As time went by, we tried entering more tournaments in the area and one after another got either cancelled, or our division was not available. However, fundraising was still being done. We called the regional director for the organization hosting these tournaments and basically bugged him to allow us to play somewhere so that we could make it to Nationals. He directed us to the State director who we also "bugged". He then was able to speak to the people at Nationals who agreed to give us a spot as long as we payed by a certain time that day - this was about a week after the regular deadline was posted. We sent the money, I even used my own debit card to save time. However, the payment was posted too late. Now, we didn't know that we had a time limit when we payed. The State director told me (I spoke to him because my husband was not available at the time) that it had to be done "today", he did not say it had to be done by a specific time. Regardless, after this date, and just about a week before the National tournament was to happen, two parents called wanting to get together at a meeting. Turns out that they were not going to be able to go to Florida after all. One parent had some emergency come up and had to use up the money she had been saving. The other parent however, said that since we did not raise enough money to cover ALL expenses for everyone involved, that she did not want to go, because even though she had the money to spend, she was going to spend it on other things, like school supplies. Now, I should say that with the money we raised, we were going to be able to pay for the van rentals, accomodations for everyone, (9 girls, 2 coaches, parents, and some siblings), and the tournament fee. I believe we even had enough for most of the gas since we were going to drive the whole way - Oh, and I volunteered myself as a driver! What the parents were going to have to pay was food and theme park tickets (Disney Word) Which I found at discounted prices. Well, this is when the problem began. During this meeting, I personally, and in front of all other parents, offered to help out the parent that had the emergency by lending her money so that she and her daughter be able to attend. She was grateful but said she had to speak to her husband. Another parent said she wasn't sure whether her girls (2) would be able to go either so we were basically down to 5 girls, just barely a team. We said that if we still had a team we would still go and the parents didn't like it, they argued that they had raised a lot of money and that it wouldn't be fair for their daughters not to go. We told them that their spot was open and that if they decided to go that they would be welcome. Anyways, the parent that didn't want to spend the money (I'll call her Mrs. H) just had it with us after that. Some of the other parents were pretty mad that the trip seemed to not be able to happen and one in particular Ms. C, who was a great help to all of us, parents and coaches, decided to not argue anymore and not even answer her phone anymore when the rest of the parents called her so that there would be no arguments between them. Ms. C is the sister of the Treasurer mentioned above, Mr. Z.
Anyways, we found out we couldn't go to Florida after all and so everybody (all parents) agreed to enter a tournament in Houston (about 5 hrs from here). This tournament too was cancelled and so we decided to not attempt any more tournaments (this was the fifth or sixth tournament we tried to enter and were unable to attend). So, the money was to be spent with the original intention - for basketball purposes. Some of the parents, Mrs. H and one more Mrs. J wanted to spend it on taking a trip to a nearby city where the girls, and the parents, would be able to take a quick vacation and attend some theme parks. We reminded them that this was not possible and that we had all agreed that the money was to be spend on basketball related stuff, not vacations. Oh, and just before this, maybe a week, these parents tried contacting Ms. C and she once again did not answer her phone. I guess they tried calling her several times. The point is that they (we're not sure exactly who) called the cops on her. The cops arrived at Ms. C's parents house where she spends a lot of time, looking for her. We later found that it had been a "courtesy call" and that no report had been made, but Mr. Z was furious because they were looking for Ms. C, and Mr. Z, even though they did not have his correct name. They switched his first name to a similar one, which just happened to be his dad's name. Also, Mrs. H's uncle just happens to be a judge. He was contacted on the matter, and therefore involved. Much to her dismay, Ms. C is a close personal friend of his and so he called her and asked about the situation. He agreed that what was being done - buying equipment for the girls with the funds - was the right thing to do, and that we shouldn't let the parents rush us. That all decisions were to be made by the President, my husband, Vice President, myself, and the Treasurer, Mr. Z, since we were the only officers. Now, Mr. Z is a federal employee and does not need any sort of trouble that can affect his work. But, more on that later.
Anyway, the parents still wanted to go on their vacation and we told them again that it would not happen, especially since the cops and judge were involved. Well, they called my husband's Pricipal and wanted her to convince him to allow the funds to be used for this purpose. Now, again, this whole summer thing had NOTHING to do with the school, and the parents knew this, they were constantly reminded of this by us, but they still involved the Principal. This didn't work and so they left matters alone. This was in late July.
What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?
(I have had to cut this in two parts because I wrote too much since I was trying to be thorough, please read on to the second part, thks)
Hi there, I hope somebody can help out here before this situation gets even worse, as it seems to keep doing.
In a nut shell, my husband has been affected by vicious, untrue comments about him. These comments have come from parents (two) of some of the members of the basketball team he and I coached during the summer. Our original intention was to raise enough money for the team and their parents to attend Nationals in Florida this past July. For several reasons this trip did not happen and the money was just recently spent on equipment which was distributed to all 9 girls. We, my husband and I, as coaches, did not have access to the money, the treasurer, an uncle from one of the team members volunteered and he was the only one with access to it. (I will explain in detail below) The process of us buying equipment and distributing it was slow, yes, for various personal reasons, but some of the parents believe that we "stole" the money or used it and then replaced it without their knowledge. Because of this, they went to my husband's boss (the school Principal) and even threatened to go to the School Board or the Superintendant. However, the worst comment that we have heard so far has been that he kept the money (about $2600) and spent it to get drunk and buy drugs. That is absolutely ridiculous and malicious. Neither one of us drinks, smokes, or much less do drugs. This rumor has spread throughout his school and now he will not be named Athletic Coordinator any more. All we tried to do was give these underprivileged girls an opportunity at a great experience and it has now been hell and then some. Please, please, somebody help us figure out what we can do in this situation. Thank you in advance to those who post.
More detailed explanation:
I have been a volunteer assistant basketball coach since October. My husband works at the school where these girls (9, from 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade) attend. He works there as a Physical Education aid, but has all his credentials to be a head coach, there just haven't been positions available. Anyways, the school year was great for him as he was named Athletic Coordinator and his original basketball team (7 of these 9 girls + 5 others). They finished the season as the undefeated City Champions in their division and were then invited to participate in other tournaments, which had nothing to do with the school or the district for that matter. After attending a couple of these, the opportunity of attending Nationals arose and we told the parents who were very interested. AT first everything was great, all the parents got along, fund raising was done cooperatively and the focus was on the girls, as it should've always been. Now, I should say that in the meantime, both my husband and I made all arrangements and sent all payments to attend these tournaments and upcoming ones as well. The fees were payed by either the parents or by funds collected through fundraising. We had regular meetings which went well. Obviously, some parents helped more than others, but this was forseen. In one of these meetings, we decided that someone had to be responsible for the money. One of the parents, who later we found out is one of the two who have made these comments, was offered the position of Treasurer, and she declined. So, Mr. Z, an uncle of one of the girls volunteered and all of those present agreed. His sister (the mom of the girl) has been very involved in this whole organization and fundraising efforts.
As time went by, we tried entering more tournaments in the area and one after another got either cancelled, or our division was not available. However, fundraising was still being done. We called the regional director for the organization hosting these tournaments and basically bugged him to allow us to play somewhere so that we could make it to Nationals. He directed us to the State director who we also "bugged". He then was able to speak to the people at Nationals who agreed to give us a spot as long as we payed by a certain time that day - this was about a week after the regular deadline was posted. We sent the money, I even used my own debit card to save time. However, the payment was posted too late. Now, we didn't know that we had a time limit when we payed. The State director told me (I spoke to him because my husband was not available at the time) that it had to be done "today", he did not say it had to be done by a specific time. Regardless, after this date, and just about a week before the National tournament was to happen, two parents called wanting to get together at a meeting. Turns out that they were not going to be able to go to Florida after all. One parent had some emergency come up and had to use up the money she had been saving. The other parent however, said that since we did not raise enough money to cover ALL expenses for everyone involved, that she did not want to go, because even though she had the money to spend, she was going to spend it on other things, like school supplies. Now, I should say that with the money we raised, we were going to be able to pay for the van rentals, accomodations for everyone, (9 girls, 2 coaches, parents, and some siblings), and the tournament fee. I believe we even had enough for most of the gas since we were going to drive the whole way - Oh, and I volunteered myself as a driver! What the parents were going to have to pay was food and theme park tickets (Disney Word) Which I found at discounted prices. Well, this is when the problem began. During this meeting, I personally, and in front of all other parents, offered to help out the parent that had the emergency by lending her money so that she and her daughter be able to attend. She was grateful but said she had to speak to her husband. Another parent said she wasn't sure whether her girls (2) would be able to go either so we were basically down to 5 girls, just barely a team. We said that if we still had a team we would still go and the parents didn't like it, they argued that they had raised a lot of money and that it wouldn't be fair for their daughters not to go. We told them that their spot was open and that if they decided to go that they would be welcome. Anyways, the parent that didn't want to spend the money (I'll call her Mrs. H) just had it with us after that. Some of the other parents were pretty mad that the trip seemed to not be able to happen and one in particular Ms. C, who was a great help to all of us, parents and coaches, decided to not argue anymore and not even answer her phone anymore when the rest of the parents called her so that there would be no arguments between them. Ms. C is the sister of the Treasurer mentioned above, Mr. Z.
Anyways, we found out we couldn't go to Florida after all and so everybody (all parents) agreed to enter a tournament in Houston (about 5 hrs from here). This tournament too was cancelled and so we decided to not attempt any more tournaments (this was the fifth or sixth tournament we tried to enter and were unable to attend). So, the money was to be spent with the original intention - for basketball purposes. Some of the parents, Mrs. H and one more Mrs. J wanted to spend it on taking a trip to a nearby city where the girls, and the parents, would be able to take a quick vacation and attend some theme parks. We reminded them that this was not possible and that we had all agreed that the money was to be spend on basketball related stuff, not vacations. Oh, and just before this, maybe a week, these parents tried contacting Ms. C and she once again did not answer her phone. I guess they tried calling her several times. The point is that they (we're not sure exactly who) called the cops on her. The cops arrived at Ms. C's parents house where she spends a lot of time, looking for her. We later found that it had been a "courtesy call" and that no report had been made, but Mr. Z was furious because they were looking for Ms. C, and Mr. Z, even though they did not have his correct name. They switched his first name to a similar one, which just happened to be his dad's name. Also, Mrs. H's uncle just happens to be a judge. He was contacted on the matter, and therefore involved. Much to her dismay, Ms. C is a close personal friend of his and so he called her and asked about the situation. He agreed that what was being done - buying equipment for the girls with the funds - was the right thing to do, and that we shouldn't let the parents rush us. That all decisions were to be made by the President, my husband, Vice President, myself, and the Treasurer, Mr. Z, since we were the only officers. Now, Mr. Z is a federal employee and does not need any sort of trouble that can affect his work. But, more on that later.
Anyway, the parents still wanted to go on their vacation and we told them again that it would not happen, especially since the cops and judge were involved. Well, they called my husband's Pricipal and wanted her to convince him to allow the funds to be used for this purpose. Now, again, this whole summer thing had NOTHING to do with the school, and the parents knew this, they were constantly reminded of this by us, but they still involved the Principal. This didn't work and so they left matters alone. This was in late July.
What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?