Help....

[Foreverafamily]

My questions is do step parents have rights??? I have a situation where my ex has got remarried and it seems as though if I need to communicate with him about the kids I have to call her cell phone and she has to relay the message for him to call me back. Also a situation occured where he called me about a visitation issue and not even 2 minutes after we hung up she called me back asking questions. What should I do??? ON top of all this she acts like I need to talk to her and not my ex. Our kids are not her kids therefore why would I discuss things with her???? I have already had a situation in the past where she made up stuff that I never said to cause problems.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

oh CJane, where are you???????

STEPPARENTS have NO rights. Be specific with your ex. All communications need to be with only the parents.

 

[milspecgirl]

send him a certified letter stating that you will only be communicating with him concerning the children and you will no longer be speaking to her. Anything he tries to communicate through her will be ignored and therefore not considered to be communicated. then, do not take her calls, ignore her emails, etc. if she does try to talk to you- inform her politely that you will only discuss it with the other parent

however, is she hateful or threatening in anyway? I don't particularly like my ex's new wife, but since she is the keeper of the schedules, etc and he wont do anything without talking to her first- i just cut out the middleman and go to her most of the time. Of course, he works all the time and doesn't return my calls.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

I was able to block my ex's GF email address since she send evil hateful ones.

 

[Foreverafamily]

Not Only

Not only is she hateful and rude, she writes all kinds of degrading remarks on her journal pages about me and my family. I have told him in the past and recently that I will only be commuincating with him and our court order specifically says NO THIRD PARTY INTERFERENCE, but she continues.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

hmmmmm ... I predict a contempt of court hearing in the future using the FA crystal ball

 

[milspecgirl]

you need to send her a letter stating that she is to take all mention of you or your family off of any page she maintains and if she refuses, you will file suit and that if she continues to try to interfere with your co-parenting with your ex, you will file contempt charges on the 3rd party interference clause

 

[Foreverafamily]

i've done that and nothing seems to faze her. (I think she has some serious problems). On top of all this my children are starting to ask me why she is the one that picks them up and drops them off at school (when there was no school and my ex would have to pick them up from my house) she would have a need to follow him. Why?? No clue. My children have also stressed to me recently that she interrogates them when she is alone with them and tells my oldest that when he turns 12 he can go tell the judge who he wants to live with. What is her motive??? I am still trying to figure that out. I don't know any other ways to deal with this woman.

 

[milspecgirl]

you need to sit down with your ex now and discuss this. If it is his time, he can have them picked up or dropped off by anyone- it could be more convenient for his work, etc. However, you need to inform your ex that she is to stop interfering and that if she does not, you will take it back to court to make her stop. that you consider this interference and parental alienation and that under no circumstances is she to discuss future living relationships with them

 

[Foreverafamily]

Agreed!

Thank you all for all this helpful information. Lets hope it works

 

[momxthree]

Follow through with your threat

If you've 'warned' her that you will file contempt charges and she continues, then file. You can threaten a child every day of their life, but if you never follow through with the punishment then the threats mean nothing. She is only going to do what you let her get away with. Some adults insist on never growing up.
I'm not an attorney and didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night... but if I were you I would make sure I had a solid case before following through. Nothing like looking like an idiot in front of the judge (not to mention the ex and their other half). Thankfully my ex can't help but be the idiot...sorry, I'm projecting. Good luck to you!
Oh, and try not to worry too much about what SM says to the children, funny thing is children usually figure things out all on their own. Give SM just enough rope, and eventually she'll hang herself!!

 

[peppier]

What do you mean about the journal?

What do you mean about the journal? Does she have one online or something?

 

[CJane]

Being a bitch about you and your family in her blog is NOT cause for a suit. You'll look like a friggin idiot. Seriously. Don't even threaten it.

Take the high road. ALL. OF. THE. TIME.

Set her phone number to go straight to VM or ignore it. Call Dad's phone only. If she answers the phone, do NOT engage. Just ask for Dad. If she refuses to let you speak to him, leave a message and hang up. Be sooooo nice you want to vomit... and then be a little nicer.

Do not respond to her emails. In fact, set your email so they go into their own folder and don't even read them.

Correspond with dad ONLY.

Set boundaries. It's REALLY not that hard. Even with a bunny boiler step mom.