Home DNA tests

[Fairy4]

What is the name of your state? VA

My husband has a five year old from a previous relationship. The mother is wanting him to sign over his rights so that her husband can adopt her. My husband really has never been involved in this little girl's life, so he isn't ruling out signing over his rights.

Question: Although he signed paternity papers and the birth certificate, he has reason to believe that the child might not be his. He asked the mother if she would consent to a home DNA test. My husband said that he didn't want to go through the court system if it isn't needed. Does anyone know if home kits are pretty reliable? The mother said "they are too complicated"; has anyone tried them? I mean, how hard could it be to "horizontally swab the inside of the cheek, while rotating the swab"?

 

[BelizeBreeze]

What is the name of your state? VA

My husband has a five year old from a previous relationship. The mother is wanting him to sign over his rights so that her husband can adopt her. My husband really has never been involved in this little girl's life, so he isn't ruling out signing over his rights.

Question: Although he signed paternity papers and the birth certificate, he has reason to believe that the child might not be his. He asked the mother if she would consent to a home DNA test. My husband said that he didn't want to go through the court system if it isn't needed. Does anyone know if home kits are pretty reliable? The mother said "they are too complicated"; has anyone tried them? I mean, how hard could it be to "horizontally swab the inside of the cheek, while rotating the swab"?

If he signed the acknowledgement of paternity then the child is legally his, regardless of dna, blood or the shake n bake test.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? VA

My husband has a five year old from a previous relationship. The mother is wanting him to sign over his rights so that her husband can adopt her. My husband really has never been involved in this little girl's life, so he isn't ruling out signing over his rights.

Question: Although he signed paternity papers and the birth certificate, he has reason to believe that the child might not be his. He asked the mother if she would consent to a home DNA test. My husband said that he didn't want to go through the court system if it isn't needed. Does anyone know if home kits are pretty reliable? The mother said "they are too complicated"; has anyone tried them? I mean, how hard could it be to "horizontally swab the inside of the cheek, while rotating the swab"?

If finding out the answer would effect his decision as to whether or not to terminate his parental rights...then he can insist that he won't even consider signing unless she allows the test......and no, they aren't complicated and they are reliable.

However, if he has pretty much decided that he is going to give up his parental rights...then let it go.

 

[Fairy4]

He found out a few years ago (from the bi-mother) that she was cheating at the time (one time according to her). He has the little girl on his insurance, etc. but he feels that because he's not 100% sure if she is his, then he definitely doesn't want to sign his rights over ithout the test. Wouldn't the adoption be null if my husband signed over his rights then one day it came out that she wasn't his child? Not to mention he feels it's not fair to the little girl!

I'll let him know that the home DNA tests are reliable and pretty simple to perform.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

I'll let him know that the home DNA tests are reliable and pretty simple to perform.

and NOT admissible in court.

 

[CJane]

then one day it came out that she wasn't his child?

Legally, she IS his child. Are genetics THAT important? Is he going to sign over his rights if she's NOT biologically his, and not sign them over if she is? What actually changes?

 

[Fairy4]

CJane: I understand what you are saying...and you are right; legally he is her father. But isn't it morally wrong (in my opinion) to sign your rights over to a child that you know might not be yours? He's never really had a relationship with this child (my husband's & bio-mother's fault). If he is the father, then he can think about whether he wants to sign over his rights or not, but if he's not the bio-father, shouldn't the real bio-father get to make that decision of whether or not he wants to give up his rights? The poor man doesn't even know that this child might be his, or that she even exists!

No...of course the test isn't a decision maker, I think he thinks of it as a starting place! Not sure what his plans are IF he's found not to be the father, I don't think he's thought that far in advance either!

He wasn't aware that his ex had slept around when he signed the paternity papers. He should of taken it to court, etc. when he found out there was a possiblity that she wasn't his child, but he didn't because he had just lost a child in a tragic accident (his reasoning).


BB: We realize that they are not admissable in court.

 

[brisgirl825]

If he is the father, then he can think about whether he wants to sign over his rights or not, but if he's not the bio-father, shouldn't the real bio-father get to make that decision of whether or not he wants to give up his rights? The poor man doesn't even know that this child might be his, or that she even exists!

It is a moot point, the child is his regardless of DNA. If he found out the child is not his, he couldn't stop being the legal father. It's his decision not whomever may be bio-dad.

 

[CJane]

CJane: shouldn't the real bio-father get to make that decision of whether or not he wants to give up his rights?

The 'real' bio-father HAS no rights. The legal father does. Even if he's not biologically her father, he's the ONLY ONE with rights. And he's the ONLY ONE who can reliquish/enforce those rights.

 

[LdiJ]

It is a moot point, the child is his regardless of DNA. If he found out the child is not his, he couldn't stop being the legal father. It's his decision not whomever may be bio-dad.

That's a very valid point. If he terminates his parental rights he is not making that decision for anyone else who might be the biological father. He is making it only for himself.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

You asked this same question in a slightly different format a month ago. Did anyone read it? https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=285480 In that thread you give different facts. According to those facts, you husband owes approx $7,200 arreages in child support for this child. That debt will still be owed and continue to increase unless and until, he petitions the court to disestablish paternity or establish a modified parenting/visitation plan.

Here is a link explaining in some detail the process. While a private paternity test is less expensive and simpler with a swab, he will have to pay for the court ordered test in any event and the increased time to file will more than offset the cost of the test which he will have to pay for anyway. This will also involve the appointment of a GAL for the child. http://www.dss.virginia.gov/files/division/dcse/court_cases/09disestablishingpaternity-r.pdf