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I live in MN. I have lived here all of my life. I have two children with one father. One child is 6 and one child is 4. We were never married. I have sole custody. ROP was signed after both births. Child Support has been suspended for the past 6 months. Father has visitation only; EOW, 6wks/summer and EOH.
For the last 6 months, I have been living with the father (and his parents) due to other personal matters involving his 2nd DWI. We are not together and do not plan to be.
My fiance' is in the military and we plan to marry soon. Currently, the children are enrolled in a school where we all live but it is entirely possible we will be moving (the children and I, with my fiance) to a location quite far from here; as he has re-enlisted and will be staioned somewhere else within the state of MN.
Can anyone offer any advice on how prepared I should be before the move takes place? In respect to: What steps should I take prior to my move with my fiance, school enrollment, transfer of health insurance, etc. Do I need to acknowledge the court systems of my plan to move out of the city where the father resides? Do I need to acknowledge the courts of my worries of his possible attempted restrainment (If that even made sense)?
I am expecting the father to throw serious mud as he is not happy that things did not progress into a relationship based on my temporary living situation. He is aware that there is another man in my life but unaware of our plans to marry and my plans to have the children live with me and my fiance. I am not planning on taking the children in the night, but waiting until the last moment, as I am concerned he may become violent and very aggressive. He has threatened to involve the local authorities in restraining me from leaving in the past. Can he even involve the police if I have custody?

On a side note; this has been a very sticky situation and in all honesty, I do not want to keep him from the children, but after living under the same roof with our children, their father, and their grandparents; I can wholeheartedly say that he is not what is best for them nor are his parents. He has openly insulted and abused me in front of our children, an action I never intended him on doing; I have tried to be supportive as a parent with him and also his friend, but I am very worried that he could keep the kids and I from moving together with my fiance.
I am sorry to blab on, but any and all advice in what steps I can take to make this more simple (which is a horrible word to describe custody issues, I am aware).
Please advise.
Thank you
-A concerned mother in MN
 
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stealth2

Under the Radar Member
You should likely go over your custody papers with a fine tooth comb, and then check MN law to find out what you need to do in order to be permitted to move the children. Yes, Dad can file with the court to keep the children from being moved. And there is a likelihood that a court would bar you from taking them with.
 
stealth2 said:
You should likely go over your custody papers with a fine tooth comb, and then check MN law to find out what you need to do in order to be permitted to move the children. Yes, Dad can file with the court to keep the children from being moved. And there is a likelihood that a court would bar you from taking them with.
Thank you for your advice, I will get right on that. And is it in my best interests to obtain an attorney now, or wait to see what his move will be?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Consulting with an attorney would make much more sense than not. Especially if you intend to wait until the last moment to inform him of your move (I suspect you have to provide him at least 30 days notice, if not 60).
 

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