How do I get the courts to strip rights?

[MELISSA71]

Hello, I have an 8 year old daughter whose father took it upon himself to see her only about 5 hours total for 2 occassions, in a 14 month period. I live in New york. He left new york over a year ago and moved to pennsylvania and now he is moving to virginia because he wants to, not because of a transfer of any kind. He is in arrears for 6500. Currently for the past 8 weeks, going on 9 I have not received anything, and he keeps lying saying it is in the mail. I had to give CSEB his employer the last few times and he refused to give me this new one, but I investigated it myself and finally got it and I gave it to CSEB. He has never voluntarily paid child support. He left New york, where he has 6 outstanding warrants for his arrest. In the beggining when he stopped his visitation, I contacted him, to see why. He kept saying she is better off without him. I tried to talk some sense into him, that it will hurt her and to think of her. I am the one who told her to a least call her, because he never did, never asked her how she was, or how was school, he just stopped all communication. He fially listened to me and statred to call sparatically, but now he was making promises to her that he would see her and make plans with me to see her and tell her everything a little girl wants to do, but never showed up. He did this at leaset 6-7 times. Ibelieve I made it worse asking him to call. She is seeing a school pyshcologist about the abandoment of her dad. She aks me why he keeps lying to her, and not seeing her. I have a great guy in my life now for the past three years and he is so good with her. She took it upon herself to call him Dad sometimes. We are getting married and he wants to adopt her. My ex, I know will not allow it, even though he has no contact with her. Will the courts hear me without his consent. His family is behind me and I am in contact with his probation officer. I also was awarded full custody because of all his problems and his actions regarding her. Please help. What is the process? Thank you

 

[LegalBeagle]

Hello, I have an 8 year old daughter whose father took it upon himself to see her only about 5 hours total for 2 occassions, in a 14 month period. I live in New york. He left new york over a year ago and moved to pennsylvania and now he is moving to virginia because he wants to, not because of a transfer of any kind. He is in arrears for 6500. Currently for the past 8 weeks, going on 9 I have not received anything, and he keeps lying saying it is in the mail. I had to give CSEB his employer the last few times and he refused to give me this new one, but I investigated it myself and finally got it and I gave it to CSEB. He has never voluntarily paid child support. He left New york, where he has 6 outstanding warrants for his arrest. In the beggining when he stopped his visitation, I contacted him, to see why. He kept saying she is better off without him. I tried to talk some sense into him, that it will hurt her and to think of her. I am the one who told her to a least call her, because he never did, never asked her how she was, or how was school, he just stopped all communication. He fially listened to me and statred to call sparatically, but now he was making promises to her that he would see her and make plans with me to see her and tell her everything a little girl wants to do, but never showed up. He did this at leaset 6-7 times. Ibelieve I made it worse asking him to call. She is seeing a school pyshcologist about the abandoment of her dad. She aks me why he keeps lying to her, and not seeing her. I have a great guy in my life now for the past three years and he is so good with her. She took it upon herself to call him Dad sometimes. We are getting married and he wants to adopt her. My ex, I know will not allow it, even though he has no contact with her. Will the courts hear me without his consent. His family is behind me and I am in contact with his probation officer. I also was awarded full custody because of all his problems and his actions regarding her. Please help. What is the process? Thank you

There are two ways to go here.. First, write him a letter. Start the letter off by telling him that you will be petitioning the court to strip his of all visitation and contact because of the extremely bad effect it is having on the child. Also, you will be pursuing the CS arrears and will follow it through until he is jailed. Then, tell him that there is an 'out'. That is he agrees to an adoption. This will result in him being 'free' and you will also agree to cancel all CS arrears.

The other way is to retain an attorney and force the adoption.. but this is harder, more costly and can fail if he shows the judge he wants to change and see the child.

Personally, I would start with option 1, if he refuses, hound him with court petitions and have his ass thrown in jail. He may change his mind...

 

[MELISSA71]

Thank you very much for your helpful information. Jail doesn't seem to scare him. His license was suspended, and now he has 5 warrants for his arrest for driving without a license, He has 1 warrent for pety larceny. They are not doing anything about it because he is low priority and he keeps moving. He moved to PA and now he is going to virginia.I took him to court to get full custody and I had to go three times because he did not show. But they awarded it to me. He had 30 days to dispute, and never did. I told him about the adoption like you said but he says over his dead body. I didn't try the he doesn't have to pay the arrears approach yet, but I will. Thank you. Do I need a lawyer even if he doesn't show? Thank you