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How to see the father of my unborn child

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lee2010

Junior Member
FLORIDA :
I'm 17 years old and pregnant. The father of my child that I plan to marry was just released from jail yesterday for a violation of probation. He was put back on house arrest till the end of his probation in 2012.

Before arrested his P.O. told him she would violate him if he was to see me at all due to a call made by my parents to her ordering him not to see me. My parents changed their mind and allowed me to see him.

Two days ago in court, the judge told him he isn't allowed to have any contact with me till he is off probation in 2012. What do I do if anything possible? Our child will be born early next year & I will be 18 years old a month after. I want him to be there for me and my child I need his help and support. Please help me. And again, my parents would allow me to see him.
 


CdwJava

Senior Member
I guess you or your parents will have to help him pay for an attorney to fight that condition of his release. I strongly suspect there are reasons for this condition, but it is HIS condition, not yours, and there may be very little you can do about it.

If he wants to, you and your parents can spend a few thousand on an attorney to try and get him back before a judge to plead to see you and the baby. Absent that or a spontaneous change of heart by the court, until 2012 I guess the two of you have to remain apart.
 

lee2010

Junior Member
Okay, should I start by contacting his P.O?
& Also, I do believe alot has to do with my father(whom which I do not live with and has not paid child support in over 7 years) made a call to his P.O. as well. He obviously is seeking prison time for my boyfriend. But the P.O. is unaware of his 0% custody.

Also he is of legal age to be with me.
Thanks
 

cbg

I'm a Northern Girl
But you are not of legal age to be with him.

By that I mean that until you are 18, your parents, not you, get to decide who you may and may not see. And a court can put further limitations on it.

So unless the court can be convinced to lift the prohibition, there is a simple answer to your question. You don't.

His PO cannot lift the order. Only a judge can. That means that you or your parents are going to need to pay a lawyer. And it will not be cheap.
 

CdwJava

Senior Member
Being of legal age to have sex with you does not mean that a parent has to permit it, or that it is in the best interest of the parolee. Your fiance will have to convince the P.O. and the court that you will not harm his rehabilitation.

I suspect the best that you can hope for is that it be put off until you are 18.
 

lee2010

Junior Member
Thanks, & I am of legal age to be with him considering Florida stat rape laws.
He just turned 19. Also, there is nothing proving I am a problem to him. Other than the fact that I am pregnant, I have a clean record & have tried my best to be a positive influence on him.
 

cbg

I'm a Northern Girl
You're missing the point.

If you are under the age of 18, if your parents say that you cannot be with him (and I am not talking about only sexually - I am talking about seeing or communicating with him in any way) then you can't. Doesn't matter what the stat rape laws say; as long as you are even one minute under 18, your parents do not have to allow him to see you or talk to you or communicate with you in any way, regardless of whether the law would consider sex between the two of you stat rape or not.
 

>Charlotte<

Lurker
Thanks, & I am of legal age to be with him considering Florida stat rape laws. He just turned 19. Also, there is nothing proving I am a problem to him. Other than the fact that I am pregnant, I have a clean record & have tried my best to be a positive influence on him.
Doesn't matter. If it's a condition of his parole, it will remain so until that condition is lifted. Violating that condition will get him into serious trouble. What you think should be does not change what is.
 

lee2010

Junior Member
And that is where I am confused because my mother whom is legally responsible for me and supports me 100% will allow me to see him. I was with him the night before his arrest (at my house with her). She wants him to be here for me.

My father that has strong hate for the kid, whom doesn't pay a penny, call or see me contacted his P.O. and told her that HE didnt want him to have anything todo with me. Would the fact that he has no custody of me make a difference? Because she is unaware of this.

Thanks
 

milspecgirl

Senior Member
if he has joint legal custody- which is very common- even if you dont see him alot (and has nothing to do with cs) he has the right to forbid it

The key is that at this point- the court controls who he sees. It doesn't matter if your parents are ok with you seeing him- the courts are not ok with him seeing you.

court order will trump what the parent says. the only way around it is to get an atty on his behalf and ask for that restriction to be lifted. His PO can't do it because he just follows the court orders. A judge will have to order the lift and a judge isn't going to do it unless a filing is made and a hearing is had.
 

>Charlotte<

Lurker
And that is where I am confused because my mother whom is legally responsible for me and supports me 100% will allow me to see him. I was with him the night before his arrest (at my house with her). She wants him to be here for me.

My father that has strong hate for the kid, whom doesn't pay a penny, call or see me contacted his P.O. and told her that HE didnt want him to have anything todo with me. Would the fact that he has no custody of me make a difference? Because she is unaware of this.

Thanks
But your mom isn't the law. His conditions of parole are a legal requirement. What's illegal doesn't become legal just because your mom says it's okay.

Despite your dad saying this is what he wanted, it's not your dad that specified this condition. The judge did that. The judge did it, and only the judge can undo it.

You said "my parents changed their minds and allowed me to see him". Your parents DO NOT have the authority to change a court order.
 

acmb05

Senior Member
And that is where I am confused because my mother whom is legally responsible for me and supports me 100% will allow me to see him. I was with him the night before his arrest (at my house with her). She wants him to be here for me.
And this was After his PO told him if he was with you he would be violated. Not a smart move on your part, his part, or mom's part.

My father that has strong hate for the kid, whom doesn't pay a penny, call or see me contacted his P.O. and told her that HE didnt want him to have anything todo with me. Would the fact that he has no custody of me make a difference? Because she is unaware of this.

Thanks
No it won't. Regardless he is still your father and he does have the right to keep losers away from his daughter.
 

acmb05

Senior Member
FLORIDA :
I'm 17 years old and pregnant. The father of my child that I plan to marry was just released from jail yesterday for a violation of probation. He was put back on house arrest till the end of his probation in 2012.

Before arrested his P.O. told him she would violate him if he was to see me at all due to a call made by my parents to her ordering him not to see me. My parents changed their mind and allowed me to see him.

Two days ago in court, the judge told him he isn't allowed to have any contact with me till he is off probation in 2012. What do I do if anything possible? Our child will be born early next year & I will be 18 years old a month after. I want him to be there for me and my child I need his help and support. Please help me. And again, my parents would allow me to see him.
You know what has not been asked yet? What was this wonderful young upstanding citizen on probation for to begin with and were you involved in the crime?

Oh and your parents did not change their mind. Only one parent did.
 

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