Husband Cheated

[WHJFFW]

I recently found out that my husband had an affair 4 years ago with a a woman whom was also maried. this woman got a divorce and her husband asked for a paternity test on the child he had raised for 3 years. The test revealved that the chilkd was not his. This woman called my husband. My husband told me about the affair and we had a paternity test done on the child. the child has been determined to be my husbands chuild. this woman has filed for child support, my husband was laid off a few months ago and is no longer recieving unemployemnt. Will i be expected to pay child support to her? Ive heard of tax refunds being intercepted. will they intercept my return?

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

I recently found out that my husband had an affair 4 years ago with a a woman whom was also maried. this woman got a divorce and her husband asked for a paternity test on the child he had raised for 3 years. The test revealved that the chilkd was not his. This woman called my husband. My husband told me about the affair and we had a paternity test done on the child. the child has been determined to be my husbands chuild. this woman has filed for child support, my husband was laid off a few months ago and is no longer recieving unemployemnt. Will i be expected to pay child support to her? Ive heard of tax refunds being intercepted. will they intercept my return?

**** U.S. LAW ONLY - PLEASE INCLUDE YOUR STATE BECAUSE LAWS VARY FROM STATE TO STATE.****

 

[WHJFFW]

california

california

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

My response:

Despite the fact that your husband is unemployed, if he remains unemployed, the court will still "impute" a certain amount of earning ability to him. The imputed amount will be in line with the California "Guidelines" for child support.

So, if your husband doesn't pay, he could find himself in "contempt of court" for his failure to obey the court's orders. That could spell fines and / or jail time. That means, quite simply, he had better find himself a job REAL quick.

If you file a joint tax return, be prepared to have that refund intercepted.

You are not obligated to pay the child support except under extreme and severe circumstances. It is highly unlikely that a court would order you to personally be obligated to pay any support.

However, let's be realistic about this too. Any money that he pays, also hurt you because that money will no longer be in the "community" for you to spend as you choose.

Good luck to you . . . and, especially, your husband on finding a new job.

IAAL

 

[WHJFFW]

Thank you-
one more question
She also stated that she needed him to take out a life insurance policy out on himself with her child as the beneficary. can she make us do that?

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

Thank you-
one more question
She also stated that she needed him to take out a life insurance policy out on himself with her child as the beneficary. can she make us do that?

My response:

No, but the court will order him to do that. That's a typical requirement that courts make in their orders.

Do you want to know why?

IAAL

 

[WHJFFW]

yes, please

Im also wondering about her ex husband. Ive seen on tv where men have found not be the father but still ordered to pay. Im not thinking we shoukd not handle our our reponsibilities, just wondering about him?

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

yes, please

Im also wondering about her ex husband. Ive seen on tv where men have found not be the father but still ordered to pay. Im not thinking we shoukd not handle our our reponsibilities, just wondering about him?

My response:

Non-parent orders for child support are rare in California, and only under severe and special circumstances. It's extremely unlikely her ex-husband will have any responsibility in this matter, so you can pretty much get that out of your head. It's your husband who's responsible, and I haven't heard anything from you that he's anything other than able-bodied - - just unemployed.

Maintenance of life insurance for benefit of supported children:

On the question of spousal support, the court has express statutory authority to order the purchase of an annuity for the supported spouse or the maintenance of insurance on the life of the support obligor for the benefit of the supported spouse; the purpose is to ensure that a "needy" spouse will not be left without means for support in the event the support order is terminated by the obligor party's death (Ca Fam § 4360).

No comparable statutory authority is conferred in connection with child support orders. Nonetheless, by analogy to § 4360, case law upholds the exercise of trial court discretion to order an obligor parent to add his or her minor children as beneficiaries on the obligor's life insurance policy. "[C]ourts have the power in marital dissolutions to order maintenance of life insurance for the benefit of children . . . as a support substitute." [Marriage of O'Connell (1992) 8 Cal.App.4th 565, 572-573, 10 Cal.Rptr.2d 334, 337-338--order enforceable after obligor parent's death where new spouse had been named sole beneficiary]

Formal request not necessarily essential:

The parties need not necessarily put the life insurance matter in issue through their moving or responsive papers.

IAAL

 

[WHJFFW]

yes, youre right he is able bodied. However we have enjoyed the benefits of one stay at hone parent since his termination.

 

[I AM ALWAYS LIABLE]

we have enjoyed the benefits of one stay at home parent since his termination.

My response:

Well then, I guess the party's over right about now!

"Grab your coat, and grab your hat . . . leave your resume' on the doorstep . . . gold dust at your feet, on the employment side of the street . . . "

IAAL

 

[Grace_Adler]

I just have one thing to add. If you filed joint, you can file an injured spouse form right? That way you can get your portion of the taxes back. At least that's what we've done in the past.

Also, what if a divorce has already taken place and the support order and it doesn't mention a life insurance policy? In the event of the NCPs death...what happens then? Also, can a CP go back and try to have the order modified to include one?

 

[stepmom02]

It was my understanding that in California, if the parent is married and gives birth, the husband is Presumed to be the father. There should have been no basis for a paternity test. I have never heard of that. There is something about being married at the time of birth that makes the husband responsible for the child regardless. The child knows the husband as daddy, not your husband. A court is supposed to do what's in the child's best interests, not what a DNA test reveals.

 

[haiku]

Well obviously everyone knew about this affair, and the best interest of the child is to know who the real father is, and not saddle someone else with the responsibility, just because they happen to be married to the mother!

 

[Grace_Adler]

Thank you haiku that's what I was going to say! I don't think it's fair to the child not to know and bond with their biological parent and it's not fair to the parent either. Besides what if there was a medical emergency and the biodad was the only person who could help. I don't think it's financially fair to make the husband pay when 2 people stabbed him in the back. This might be a lame example but here goes..It's like saying here..since you witnessed the car accident...you pay for their cars to get fixed..do you think that's fair just because you happened to be there and you weren't even involved in it? That's also letting the natural parent out of their responsibility. I know if I was lied to about who my real parent or parents were I'd be p***** and there would be hell to pay. The truth always comes out too. The best thing to do is let the parent bond with the bio parent (provided they are a good one..in normal circumstances) and for the bio parent to take up their responsibility. The child has a right to know their family and vice versa. Besides I always thought that most people split after an affair..so the child won't know anyone as Daddy will they? I don't think it's right for a child to call someone mom or dad that isn't..unless there is adoption or so forth. My step children were starting to call me mom and I'm sorry I don't mean this to sound cold but it made me very uncomfortable because I'm not their mother and I would never try to replace her, nor do I want to. Those are not my children. I'll always care about them (don't know them very well, long story) and I'll always try to treat them the best I can but I know my boundaries and limits and would never try to overstep them or would want to. But that's me..to each his own. I know there are exceptions.b Besides that, the youngest thinks her last name is the same as her stepdad's now and the kids think they have 2 moms and dads...and the mother doesn't correct this and I think it's wrong..it's very confusing to them. I'm really not trying to get something started or bash anyone but please think about this, how would you like it if your spouse popped up and said..well I had a child with someone else now you have to pay for that child? I'd be like ...say what? I don't think so! If any law says different then I totally disagree with it and say it should be changed. If you don't believe there are dumb laws out there..go to dumblaws.com...wow are there some doosies! One more thing....since when is lying to a child ok? Or to anyone for that matter? No one likes being lied to..and you sure can't lie in court(aren't supposed to)..so what gives them the right to do it if they tried to?