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i knew this would happen!!!

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state of mo. Here is my situation! i have a 6 yr old wonderful boy, with my ex boyfriend, we have not been together for 3 years now, i have never gotten a dime from him, we had a verbal agreement on 300 a month never happened in three years he has never given us anything, although i have never kept visitation rights from him i have been very leniant in fact!!! now its time we need a better schedule to go by, and its getting rougher to meet all the needs of a growing boy involved in so much, i need to know the best stradegy, and maybe what he owes me!!


Grandma B

Was paternity ever established? If not, you first need to get that done. Then, you need to petition the court for custody of the child and you can ask for child support at the same time.


Senior Member
you are going to luck out a little. MO uses CSE and it doesn't cost the mom a dime. they are normally located around the county courthouse. you need to go there with a copy of the BC and proof of your income. (oh yeah, id)

they will help you to establish paternity if it hasn't been done. they will also do all the paperwork to get the order in place. in our county at least, this is a free service. modifications are free as well.

the cases are paid through the court. he pays them. they cut you a check. they even have direct deposit.

they automatically review every three years. you can also request a review once every three years (so can dad). all of that paper work is through them and again shouldn't cost a dime.

for what he owes you - technically nothing. you never had an order in place. he was not responsible to pay. you could request that it be retroactive - but i don't know how successful you would be at that. you knew where he was and he was seeing the child, but you never requested anything formal. he could say he was paying you all along and you would have to prove he wasn't. he would need receipts, but he could say it was cash. it will come down to his word against yours.

the visitation would go through the courts at your expense. CSE doesn't handle that end. if you can get him to agree to a visitation outline. draft it yourself - they have on line forms you can order for that - or get a lawyer to draft it for you. get him to sign it, pay the filig fee and have the judge sign it.

just remember - anything you work out and draw up isn't really worth anything until it gets signed by the judge.

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