• FreeAdvice has a new Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, effective May 25, 2018.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our Terms of Service and use of cookies.

Is there anything I can do?

Accident - Bankruptcy - Criminal Law / DUI - Business - Consumer - Employment - Family - Immigration - Real Estate - Tax - Traffic - Wills   Please click a topic or scroll down for more.

waitinMd

Member
What is the name of your state? Md

My child is 6 weeks old, and I have not seen her yet. My ex filed a temp custody order, and was granted under false allegations. My lawyer filed an appeal asking for full custody/visitation. The judge went on vacation. We have a 'custody' hearing next week. I think she will probably cancel. I posted last week saying her bf was calling my house.

She is living with her mother now (moved out of the bf's house), but her mothers bf lives there. It is a trailer, with 6 people living in it.

He is not supposed to be living there. There are 2 protective orders against him. The second one being 6 pages long; he is a violent alcoholic and drugs are involved. Yesterday I was contemplating everything that happened, and I remember my ex saying, "I will bring the baby to your house, you can't come here, my Mom's bf is back, and if you come out here, he will fight with my Mom".

I can't sleep, knowing the baby is there. Is there anything I can do??
 


Just a question

waitinMd said:
What is the name of your state? Md

My child is 6 weeks old, and I have not seen her yet. My ex filed a temp custody order, and was granted under false allegations. My lawyer filed an appeal asking for full custody/visitation. The judge went on vacation. We have a 'custody' hearing next week. I think she will probably cancel. I posted last week saying her bf was calling my house.

She is living with her mother now (moved out of the bf's house), but her mothers bf lives there. It is a trailer, with 6 people living in it.

He is not supposed to be living there. There are 2 protective orders against him. The second one being 6 pages long; he is a violent alcoholic and drugs are involved. Yesterday I was contemplating everything that happened, and I remember my ex saying, "I will bring the baby to your house, you can't come here, my Mom's bf is back, and if you come out here, he will fight with my Mom".

I can't sleep, knowing the baby is there. Is there anything I can do??
Was Paternity ever established?
 

waitinMd

Member
No. I recieved a letter from the court, saying your 'hearing' is ... and the date.

When I called and asked what the court 'hearing' was for, the judges secretary said, "Judge X, combined the two folders and has determined you are the father, it will be a "custody" hearing to set up mediation and start visitation."

But can't social services or the police be called if the PO is being violated?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
waitinMd said:
No. I recieved a letter from the court, saying your 'hearing' is ... and the date.

When I called and asked what the court 'hearing' was for, the judges secretary said, "Judge X, combined the two folders and has determined you are the father, it will be a "custody" hearing to set up mediation and start visitation."

But can't social services or the police be called if the PO is being violated?
Your child wouldn't be included in the PO since your child is only 6 weeks old.
Unless other children/minors are included in the PO and they are present in the home calling social services or the police wouldn't help.

If only adults are included in the PO and the adults choose to allow the violation nothing may help.

I think that you are making a serious error in not asking for a paternity test. I understand how anxious you are to see the child, but you really need to be sure that its your child. Only a DNA test can tell you that for sure.
 

waitinMd

Member
I am getting DNA done.... if I can get her in court.

My ex brought the baby up to one of the High Schools I work at as a substitute. I wasn't there that day, but some of the teachers saw the baby. They said she named me as the father. She also told another substitute teacher, she is not going to go to our court date next week.

What happens if she does that?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
waitinMd said:
I am getting DNA done.... if I can get her in court.

My ex brought the baby up to one of the High Schools I work at as a substitute. I wasn't there that day, but some of the teachers saw the baby. They said she named me as the father. She also told another substitute teacher, she is not going to go to our court date next week.

What happens if she does that?
Its hard to guess how a judge would handle that. Normally I would say that you would win by default....However, since we are talking about a newborn, and there has been no DNA test, I suspect that the judge would continue things to give mom another chance. Again, though, its hard to predict.
 
B

betterthanher

Guest
waitinMd said:
I am getting DNA done.... if I can get her in court.

My ex brought the baby up to one of the High Schools I work at as a substitute. I wasn't there that day, but some of the teachers saw the baby. They said she named me as the father. She also told another substitute teacher, she is not going to go to our court date next week.

What happens if she does that?
She can name anyone has the father, but it's the DNA that truly tells that. She would be very, very stupid to not show up. She would be found in contempt and can face additional penalties (look up the statutes/laws in your state). But, as LdiJ stated, it's hard to predict how a Judge might rule since it's the other way around (usually guy not showing up...).

You might also want to call the court/agency that issued the paternity establishment order to tell them what you're hearing and what the next steps will be if she fails to show. See if you can get some sort of official statement from the other staff she talked to where she stated she wouldn't show up.
 
Last edited:

waitinMd

Member
It is not scheduled as a paternity hearing. I admitted to being the father when I filed for custody/visitation. She named me on the temporary custody order. I assume the judge said, "they agree on paternity, schedule a custody hearing..... right"??????

But... then her bf was calling my house Labor day weekend saying "the baby isn't yours... there are 3 possible fathers, she wants a DNA test".

She never asked for DNA before.....

Now she is at the school telling everyone the child is mine, saying on paper it is mine, but when I ask to see my baby girl she says, "it's not yours, I want DNA."

She invited me to the hospital, gave me the wrong day for being induced, not only the wrong day, the wrong hospital. I found out from her bf it was born.

When we get into court, can I tell the judge this? I think she is stalling. I thing the child is mine. I WILL get DNA, but can't I get makeup time for all this stalling?? Can I ask for an additional time during the summer??

Now she is stalling again, by saying she will cancel? It took 5 weeks to get this court date. It is a 15 minute hearing...
 
B

betterthanher

Guest
waitinMd said:
It is not scheduled as a paternity hearing. I admitted to being the father when I filed for custody/visitation. She named me on the temporary custody order. I assume the judge said, "they agree on paternity, schedule a custody hearing..... right"??????

But... then her bf was calling my house Labor day weekend saying "the baby isn't yours... there are 3 possible fathers, she wants a DNA test".

She never asked for DNA before.....

Now she is at the school telling everyone the child is mine, saying on paper it is mine, but when I ask to see my baby girl she says, "it's not yours, I want DNA."

She invited me to the hospital, gave me the wrong day for being induced, not only the wrong day, the wrong hospital. I found out from her bf it was born.

When we get into court, can I tell the judge this? I think she is stalling. I thing the child is mine. I WILL get DNA, but can't I get makeup time for all this stalling?? Can I ask for an additional time during the summer??

Now she is stalling again, by saying she will cancel? It took 5 weeks to get this court date. It is a 15 minute hearing...
Good Lord, this has gotta be a first.

This woman is obviously hiding something. This is prime for an episode of "Maury." I don't think she can simply "cancel". She might be able to ask for a rescheduling, but it would depend (possibly) on local rules, plus you'd have to be given ample notice, too. If you have actual proof of the wrong dates, it wouldn't hurt to bring it, but if it's just "he said-she said", it might not stick. Just like her commenting about being a 'no-show' to the other teachers.

As far as getting "more time", that's all part of getting visitation/joint legal custody. You can't get "make-up time." If she continues to play this game, she might find herself visiting the child. Judges aren't too keen on a parent toying with a child like this. The only thing you can do is show up, as scheduled for the hearing and if she doesn't show, then you should be able to inquire what the next steps are.
 

waitinMd

Member
Thank You! I thought I was going crazy. I think she is hiding something. She was smoking pot during her pregnancy, and I think she may be smoking pot while breastfeeding. I'm not sure, I hope not. I can't prove it.

She does not want a court order, she is trying to avoid it. She told me they do not 'mean' anything... they can't 'do' anything to her. She does not want joint custody. She wants to live like her mother, and use the child to jerk me around. Not gonna happen. I am getting a schedule for my baby...

I have such a hard time knowing everyone else is seeing my child but me. This is so mean. How can someone lead you on for 9 months, and then turn on you, right up until it's born?

I really think she needs a mental evaluation. I'm not kidding...
 

Find the Right Lawyer for Your Legal Issue!

Fast, Free, and Confidential
data-ad-format="auto">
Top