Lawyers Please answer:custody status

[Naturalmom]

In NJ presently restraining order in effect for 6 months now,giving me custody. Father and mother never married nor cohabitated. Many problems including noncomliance with DVAC,restrainigning order, best interest evalution, home inspection, Father files for vistitation one year prior for vistitaion he already had ,then lost for Dvac reasons and restrainign order,court removed his time that was freely given to him by mother. Mother files for vistitaion support and custody,(sole with visitation) father wants joint legal and phsyical. Court appaerence this past week. for what should have been support vistitaion and custody. Support was locked in finally with arrears to the father. Visitation was expanded from 2 hour once a week to 4 hours once a week. Nothing was said about custody? So what is the present standing on custody ,sole or joint legal custody. There is nothing other then the restraining order that says I have custody of her . She is just turned two.

 

[Naturalmom]

Just bumping to have the legal eagles give a reply PLease.....

 

[Naturalmom]

Please respond legal eagles.

 

[kristine51]

just a friendly little bump for you

 

[deefran]

In NJ presently restraining order in effect for 6 months now,giving me custody. Father and mother never married nor cohabitated. Many problems including noncomliance with DVAC,restrainigning order, best interest evalution, home inspection, Father files for vistitation one year prior for vistitaion he already had ,then lost for Dvac reasons and restrainign order,court removed his time that was freely given to him by mother. Mother files for vistitaion support and custody,(sole with visitation) father wants joint legal and phsyical. Court appaerence this past week. for what should have been support vistitaion and custody. Support was locked in finally with arrears to the father. Visitation was expanded from 2 hour once a week to 4 hours once a week. Nothing was said about custody? So what is the present standing on custody ,sole or joint legal custody. There is nothing other then the restraining order that says I have custody of her . She is just turned two.

If nothing was said about custody...you may want to call your caseworker from the courthouse and speak with him/her and perhaps question why the issue was not officially resolved...assuming the child resides with you and he is only given 4 hours of visitation that you are sole custodial parent. Also read your papers...they usually will say something to the effect NCP(him) will pay XXX amount of CS to CP(you) and NCP's visitation times and dates are XXX. As for the restraining order if that was signed by a judge you are the custodial parent in the eyes of the court. Hope I helped...although I'm not a lawyer...yet.

 

[Naturalmom]

Thanks Deefran, the only paperwork I have is that child suuport is xxxx and paid to me by him weekly. Next the only thing that states custody of any sort is the restraining order,saying that I have Temporary custody as of June and the revised FRO sstates the same thing from November of this year. This strikes me as this matter is not settled because I don't know when they might take the FRO away which I hope they don't because the problems still do exist. So does that mean if the FRO expires that technically he would then have joint legal of her? We go back to court in a few weeks for his noncompliance of the DVAC orders and he is suppose to present to the court and expert witness stating that he doesn't have the existing problems. Then what?

 

[deefran]

Thanks Deefran, the only paperwork I have is that child suuport is xxxx and paid to me by him weekly. Next the only thing that states custody of any sort is the restraining order,saying that I have Temporary custody as of June and the revised FRO sstates the same thing from November of this year. This strikes me as this matter is not settled because I don't know when they might take the FRO away which I hope they don't because the problems still do exist. So does that mean if the FRO expires that technically he would then have joint legal of her? We go back to court in a few weeks for his noncompliance of the DVAC orders and he is suppose to present to the court and expert witness stating that he doesn't have the existing problems. Then what?

If it is of great concern you may have to re-petition the courts to resolve the custody issue. File for sole custody with him having visitation, this may go into mediation if he is unwilling to agree upon it...if the restraining order stays in effect this may work greatly against him if he wants joint custody. I know it's a pain to have to keep going to court, but if they failed to resolve the custody issue in the first place it's your only option left. Also, if he had visitation removed that is also going to work against him for jint custody...the most he may get would be joint legal with you having physical placement. But I seriously doubt that given his prior background. Most likely sole for you with visitation for him possibly supervised.

 

[Naturalmom]

Thank you for yu comment. Iam afraid to go back before the judge for the "crap shoot" my lawyer says to leave it alone til he petions the court again about custody. He is also presently 3000 in arrears and growing. So I might just hold tight and do the wait and see. Quite frankly he continues to cook his own goose though he feels he is getting over on the system. Thank you again.

 

[smh33]

Just from post info....most states child born out of marriage...custody defaults to mother until addressed in court.
Sounds like you did that...and what was the order...1st one,before problems....joint w/ visitation...you sole w/ dad having visitation? Basically what I read is, if no prior order...you may have sole and now do by the rest. order
If you had a custody order...what ever that was is still the 'official' position of custody but when restr. order issued,naming child to your full custody...while that order is valid, that is the current legal status of the custody...when order expires, if no new ruling custody would go back to original
You already know changes will be made in your case though...sounds like judge is giving ex benefit of doubt, couple of chances before making anything perm. I would think your lawyer (if have) would have another court date...why did you go in Nov.? Family judge's usually pretty good about wanting to have follow up & seeing that parent is making effort,etc.....my best guess???

 

[Naturalmom]

There is no other existing orders . Went to mediation in the spring time he stated joint legal and physical I stated sole with visitation. Mediator could see there was problems restraing order nt in effect . She explained to me that there was a serious case of cdomestic violence and harressment going on. I did not want problems so I kept taking it til the final straw that is when the restraining order came about and all the other incident where addressed in court at the time of the FRO. Next we where in court for his noncomlliance of DVAC orders and he was on a phone harressment binge which was addresssed at that hearing. Judge addressed the problem then. Same Judge who has been with us through out for the start. I originally gave him all day Saturday and all day sunday with dinner one night a week no overnights. That was not good enough for him. He wanted more. The courts took all that away from him because of DV conviction . Two hours ever Saturday and now it has been upgraded to 4 hours Saturday. But Iam allowed to cancel the visit within 24 hours notice if I have plans. Child supoort was addressed, and finally a more realistic number came about ,though that was strewn full of lies to get to that number.(suddenly self employed,got the picture yet of him). Lawyer says let it be the judge did not want to address it, so maybe it is because he already has in mind sole with vistitaion .