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Leaving State/Filing Custody

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bcutie

Junior Member
Unbeknownst to my baby daddy, I am leaving the state of New York with our 8 month old daughter and going back to my home state of Ohio where I can get more support from my family. We have lived together for 2yrs and aren't married. His name is on her birth certificate and she has his last name. I plan on filing for custody in Ohio. Can he drag me back to New York for any legal matters? Does the fact that his name appears own the birth certificate give him any rights.

Please give me as much info. as possible because I don't know what to expect.

Thanks.
L.J.
 


casa

Senior Member
bcutie said:
Unbeknownst to my baby daddy, I am leaving the state of New York with our 8 month old daughter and going back to my home state of Ohio where I can get more support from my family. We have lived together for 2yrs and aren't married. His name is on her birth certificate and she has his last name. I plan on filing for custody in Ohio. Can he drag me back to New York for any legal matters? Does the fact that his name appears own the birth certificate give him any rights.

Please give me as much info. as possible because I don't know what to expect.

Thanks.
L.J.
Has paternity been legally established? Usually that requires more than just signing the birth certificate.

Non-legal question: Do you really think it's fair to the father or the child to just leave the state and take away the opportunity for them to have a relationship like the one they are accustomed to? :cool:
 

NotSoNew

Senior Member
yes he can file for visitation and custody and paternity if that hasnt been established and to keep you in the state of NY, at which time you would have to go infront of a judge and prove how it is in the BABYS best interest, not yours, to move before they would let you go. YOu would be responsible for at least 1/2 of the transportation costs for your child to see his/her father. And he can keep jurisdiction in NY as long as he lives there and you will have to go back there for all court matters.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Since you haven't lived in Ohio for quite a while, you won't be able to file anything there until you've re-extablished residence. That could take anywhere from 30 days - 12 months (I don't know OH's requirements). In the meantime, Dad could file to establish paternity and custody/visitation. In NY. And yes, the court could order the child returned. If you're permitted to move, he could ask that you be responsible for ALL visitation-related transportation expenses, since you're creating the burden.
 

bcutie

Junior Member
Thanks for the responses.

First of all, we are not married we just live together so why would I have to get permission to leave the state. There is no way I'm going to pay for his transportation. I left him before for three months and my mom bought him a ticket to come to Ohio and he didn't want to come. I don't work because he wanted me to stay home with the baby until she turned one.

Secondly, Yes - I believe that children should have two STABLE parents. I am leaving my daughter's father because he is controlling, parties with other women, comes home all hours of the night into the next day, and has threatened to punch me in my jaw in front of our child. He doesn't spend much time with our daughter. The few times I've left her at home with him, he loses patience with her and she just cries all day. I feel that my daughter and I would have a better more peaceful life if I moved back to Ohio. If he wants to come visit her in Ohio, that is fine but I don't think it is healthy for us to stay in NY with him because I am completely isolated and he knows that.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
bcutie said:
Thanks for the responses.

First of all, we are not married we just live together so why would I have to get permission to leave the state. There is no way I'm going to pay for his transportation. I left him before for three months and my mom bought him a ticket to come to Ohio and he didn't want to come. I don't work because he wanted me to stay home with the baby until she turned one.

Secondly, Yes - I believe that children should have two STABLE parents. I am leaving my daughter's father because he is controlling, parties with other women, comes home all hours of the night into the next day, and has threatened to punch me in my jaw in front of our child. He doesn't spend much time with our daughter. The few times I've left her at home with him, he loses patience with her and she just cries all day. I feel that my daughter and I would have a better more peaceful life if I moved back to Ohio. If he wants to come visit her in Ohio, that is fine but I don't think it is healthy for us to stay in NY with him because I am completely isolated and he knows that.
You don't understand how it works.

You can move to Ohio and you can take your daughter with you.

However, until you have lived in Ohio for 6 months (I am pretty sure its six months) NY would still have jurisdiction of any matters regarding the child.

If dad goes to court and files for custody/visitation its very possible that a judge would order you to return the child to NY. If you disobeyed that order, you could lose custody. If you obey the order, and the judge decides to allow you to live in Ohio with the child, it is probable that the judge will order you to pay for transportation to take the child to NY for periodic visitation with the father.

However, its also possible that the judge would NOT give you permission to move the child to OH....and therefore you would have to remain in NY in order to retain custody.

So, you basically have three choices:

Get your own place in NY and file for custody.

File for custody in NY and ask the courts permission to move the child to OH.

Move to OH with the child, and hope that dad doesn't file for custody before you establish legal residency there.

However...understand that if you are able to move the child to OH....that you will be required to provide dad visitation in NY...and you will be required to pay the costs of that visitation.
 

VeronicaGia

Senior Member
bcutie said:
Thanks for the responses.

First of all, we are not married we just live together so why would I have to get permission to leave the state. There is no way I'm going to pay for his transportation. I left him before for three months and my mom bought him a ticket to come to Ohio and he didn't want to come. I don't work because he wanted me to stay home with the baby until she turned one.

You don't need permission to move, it's the child who is subject to the jurisdiction of the court. You can move wherever you want, the child is another matter. And if a judge orders you to pay for transportation, you will be pay or be in contempt of court.

Secondly, Yes - I believe that children should have two STABLE parents. I am leaving my daughter's father because he is controlling, parties with other women, comes home all hours of the night into the next day, and has threatened to punch me in my jaw in front of our child. He doesn't spend much time with our daughter. The few times I've left her at home with him, he loses patience with her and she just cries all day. I feel that my daughter and I would have a better more peaceful life if I moved back to Ohio. If he wants to come visit her in Ohio, that is fine but I don't think it is healthy for us to stay in NY with him because I am completely isolated and he knows that.
Then why did you have a child with this guy? You chose him to have a child with, now you're stuck with him for the rest of this childs life. You can "feel" anything you want, but judges don't care about how you or he "feels" they care about the law.
This is not about what you want or what he wants, it's about the law.
 

bcutie

Junior Member
Quote:
Then why did you have a child with this guy? You chose him to have a child with, now you're stuck with him for the rest of this childs life. You can "feel" anything you want, but judges don't care about how you or he "feels" they care about the law.



"Why did I have my daughter with this guy? Well, She wasn't planned but I had my daughter because I believe all children are a gift from God and abortion was out of the question. If I was as smart and perfect as you, I guess I would've chosen a better mate.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Unfortunately, this is one of the downsides of getting intimate with people you don't know all that well. Now you're stuck with Dad in your life for a long time, like it or not. You don't get to call all the shots.
 

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