leaving state

[kwalton0777]

My marriage is over and he is verbally abusive and is only a matter of time before it is physical. We have a 1 year old and a six week old. I want to leave him but the only place i have to stay is out of state. Could i leave him and take the kids out of state without him getting me for kidnapping?

 

[Silverplum]

My marriage is over and he is verbally abusive and is only a matter of time before it is physical. We have a 1 year old and a six week old. I want to leave him but the only place i have to stay is out of state. Could i leave him and take the kids out of state without him getting me for kidnapping?

Let's start here: why did you delete the handy auto-fill question that asks, WHAT IS THE NAME OF YOUR STATE?

Generally, NO. The child is half his child, too.

You are welcome, however, to move wherever you wish. Leave the child with Dad and go.

 

[kwalton0777]

Let's start here: why did you delete the handy auto-fill question that asks, WHAT IS THE NAME OF YOUR STATE?

Generally, NO. The child is half his child, too.

You are welcome, however, to move wherever you wish. Leave the child with Dad and go.

I'm in California. I read the newbie question after I posted sorry. So I would have to file for divorce and fight for custody to leave state?

 

[haiku]

If you leave the state and your ex files first, you will very likely be compelled to at least return to the state to work out the custody arrangments. Worst case scenario being you lose custody to your husband... It would be best if you did all that BEFORE you left the state.

 

[Silverplum]

I'm in California. I read the newbie question after I posted sorry. So I would have to file for divorce and fight for custody to leave state?

Yes.

But you might face quite the uphill battle. You may as well learn to accept that DAD is just as important to the children and their growth as you are; and that he has precisely the same rights to parent them that you do.

 

[kwalton0777]

besides I know I can go where ever i want but I want to take my kids with me I'm still breastfeeding. My question is how can I take my kids with me.

 

[Zigner]

besides I know I can go where ever i want but I want to take my kids with me I'm still breastfeeding. My question is how can I take my kids with me.

You've been given your answer...

 

[CourtClerk]

Your breastfeeding doesn't make you special. Your child can adjust to bottle feeding. If you want to leave with the children, you'll need a compelling reason (and because he's mean to you isn't a compelling reason) and a court order.

 

[mommyof4]

besides I know I can go where ever i want but I want to take my kids with me I'm still breastfeeding. My question is how can I take my kids with me.

Legally? Well technically, you can take the kids out of state. Just expect a court to order you to return the children to the state when Dad gets this into court. Of course, then you will have to return them and go to court providing Dad with every bit of evidence he needs to show the court that you think nothing of hi-jacking his relationship with his children. The children will remain in CA and very likely in his custody while you exercise visitation. Luckily, in this scenario, as you wish to move out of state, it should be physically easier on the kids for YOU to go back and forth instead of them.

Do you really expect everyone to believe that there is not one place for you to live in the whole state of CA?

Breastfeeding is not a legal excuse to deny Dad any time or inclusion with his children. That's why bottles and breastpumps were invented. Horrors...if worse came to worse, there's a wide variety of baby formula that will do in a pinch.

 

[kwalton0777]

Yes.

But you might face quite the uphill battle. You may as well learn to accept that DAD is just as important to the children and their growth as you are; and that he has precisely the same rights to parent them that you do.

I dont want to take the kids away from their dad but I dont have anywhere to go. I dont know anyone who lives in my state that would let me and the kids stay with them. But my parents are in Arizona and they have room. My husband told me last night that I have to leave the apartment. I stay at home and take care of the kids and he makes all the money. So obviously I have no money saved. He never gives me any. I just started back at work but only worked one day.

 

[Silverplum]

I dont want to take the kids away from their dad but I dont have anywhere to go. I dont know anyone who lives in my state that would let me and the kids stay with them. But my parents are in Arizona and they have room. My husband told me last night that I have to leave the apartment. I stay at home and take care of the kids and he makes all the money. So obviously I have no money saved. He never gives me any. I just started back at work but only worked one day.

This is not a unique problem. You have legal recourse.

For one thing, he can't just boot you from the apartment. For another, you could always file for divorce and ask for temporary support and possession of the residence.

Mostly, you need to work hard and save money right now.

 

[mommyof4]

I dont want to take the kids away from their dad but I dont have anywhere to go. I dont know anyone who lives in my state that would let me and the kids stay with them. But my parents are in Arizona and they have room. My husband told me last night that I have to leave the apartment. I stay at home and take care of the kids and he makes all the money. So obviously I have no money saved. He never gives me any. I just started back at work but only worked one day.

Well, you DON'T have to leave the apartment. Sit your fanny down on the sofa and refuse to budge. That's not that hard. If Dad wants to seperate, he can move out just as easily as you can.

If you are in danger, contact a women's shelter for advice on how best to handle this situation. If you are in immediate danger, call 911.