legal name usage

[gloria]

Please, I am posting for a friend who is pregnant and due in March. She is not married to the father and wants to give the baby her surname. She is not expecting the father to be involved, and is not seeking child support. The father though is insisting that she name the baby his surname. My friend wants to know if she can compromise and give her baby both names, and if so can the baby go by either name? Also, if she gives the baby both names, would it be harder to drop the fathers surname in the future? Or should she give the baby the fathers name and worry about changing it when the child is older? Thank you, Gloria

 

[lisab]

I was in the same situation and I'm kicking myself now. I gave my son (born in December) both of our surnames. The father has since taken off and I wish I had used my surname only. To change it now I need his consent which he will not give. He is not paying any support and doesn't see his son. I refer to my son using only my surname, but legally I have to use both.

Tell your friend to use her name only! Once she has something permanent from this guy (like marriage!!) she can change the child's name. It's easier to change it then.

 

[gloria]

Thank you for responding. Have you considered going to court to have your son's name changed? I would think the judge would rule in your favor in particular since the father does not pay CS or visit. And if your son is old enough to have a say in the matter, from my checking around I understand most judges take the childs preference into consideration. May be worth a try. Take care.

 

[shannon prendergast]

i would urge your friend to just use her surname. sounds to me like this gut won't be there for the baby so he souldn't get the honor of having the baby have his name. i don't think he can make her use his name. you can check your state law library on the internet for more details.