Legal Rights/Obligations - 20 YO Son

[JAP1958]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Pennsylvania

I'm in a difficult situation. My 20-year-old son refuses to look for a job or go to school. We've taken away his car, except to look for a job, but he doesn't. We've been seeing a counselor (my son and I) to find out if he has a mental disability, but the counselor thinks it's a personality disorder.

He stays at home (mostly - unless a friend picks him up), plays video games as does NOTHING else, except help around the house when asked.

I simply can't afford to feed and house him any longer and plan to lock him out of the house.

What are my legal rights and obligations in this situation?

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Pennsylvania

I'm in a difficult situation. My 20-year-old son refuses to look for a job or go to school. We've taken away his car, except to look for a job, but he doesn't. We've been seeing a counselor (my son and I) to find out if he has a mental disability, but the counselor thinks it's a personality disorder.

He stays at home (mostly - unless a friend picks him up), plays video games as does NOTHING else, except help around the house when asked.

I simply can't afford to feed and house him any longer and plan to lock him out of the house.

What are my legal rights and obligations in this situation?

You can NOT lock him out of the house legally. What you can do is EVICT HIM as you are his landlord and he is your tenant. Follow the landlord tenant laws for your state.
Also, you state that you have taken away his car -- whose name is on the car title? If it is his, then you LEGALLY cannot take his car from him.

 

[JAP1958]

Okay - but . .

What's he going to do if I DON'T follow eviction law in my state? He has no way to SUE me!

 

[Zigner]

What's he going to do if I DON'T follow eviction law in my state? He has no way to SUE me!

There are TON'S of attorneys that will take on a wrongful eviction case against a LL

 

[Ohiogal]

What's he going to do if I DON'T follow eviction law in my state? He has no way to SUE me!

Says you. An attorney can take the case and get a court order that YOU PAY the attorney fees. You wanted the legal answer -- you got it. YOU EVICT HIM according to landlord tenant law.

Oh and you didn't answer the other question -- is HIS name on the title to the car?

 

[ecmst12]

Locking him out (BREAKING THE LAW) is not the answer. First you have to give him 30 days notice including one full month. Give him notice today and tell him he must be out by January 1st or you will go to court to evict him. Make sure he knows you are serious.

 

[JAP1958]

The Car . . .

The car is my husband's name and always has been, so he has no legal right to it.

Are there REALLY lawyers that will take a case with a son suing a parent for throwing them out?! Doesn't say much for lawyers!

 

[ecmst12]

Of course there are lawyers that will do this. What you want to do is ILLEGAL and wrong. Follow the law and you will have no problems.

 

[ShyCat]

Are there REALLY lawyers that will take a case with a son suing a parent for throwing them out?! Doesn't say much for lawyers!

Lazy slackers have the same legal rights as everyone else, including legal representation and access to our judicial system.

Doesn't say much for YOU that you believe otherwise.

 

[Zigner]

The car is my husband's name and always has been, so he has no legal right to it.

Are there REALLY lawyers that will take a case with a son suing a parent for throwing them out?! Doesn't say much for lawyers!

They wouldn't be taking the case of a son suing a parent. They'd be taking the case of a tenant suing his landlord.

 

[JAP1958]

TO: Shycat

I DO believe in following the law - that's why I asked the question here!

You clearly aren't a parent that's had anything like this issue with your child. My heart is breaking over all of this . . .

 

[Zigner]

I DO believe in following the law - that's why I asked the question here!

You clearly aren't a parent that's had anything like this issue with your child. My heart is breaking over all of this . . .

This is a LEGAL ADVICE site. I'm sorry you have to go through this. However, you came here looking for answers to the LEGAL aspect...that's what you got.

 

[nextwife]

In the meantime: Advise him in writing that your car is off limits and he has NO permission to use it. Should he take it, report it stolen. That will shake him up!

You need to be pro active and stop enabling him. Start a proper evictiona and remove him from the home. He needs to learn responsibility NOW. Had you required him to hold part time jobs while younger? 20 is way late to first be introduced to the work place.

I'd also get a secure web router, with a security key and NOT include his PC. Change the passwords on yours, or password enable them. I'd also limit video game access to any TVs you own. Go out to eat, and bring nothing home for him. Let him learn that he needs to CONTRIBUTE to eat and have a roof over his head. Do NOT cook for him, do not leave him leftovers. Don't stock the fridge and cupboard until he leaves. Box up most of the canned and non perishable foods and such and leave in the trunk of a car that is gone during the day. Tough love- he needs to be cut off.

It IS legal to refuse to cook and shop for him. It IS legal to deny him YOUR TV. It is legal to deny him YOUR car, your internet connection. You get the idea.

 

[JAP1958]

To Nexwife

Thank you for the advice; He doesn't have a computer anymore and all keys to the car are kept with me at all times, so he can't take it.

As far as not cooking for him, etc., since I'm unemployed, I ALWAYS cook for my husband and other son, so not feeding him would make our home VERY uncomfortable.

I've been reading all of the Tough Love information I can find . . . just VERY disappointed that, legally, I have to give him 30 days notice! He doesn't deserve that much notice - I was going to give him 2 weeks . . .

Thanks again for all the advice!

 

[Ohiogal]

You either do things legally or the police can help him gain access to HIS home.