Libel accusations result in my child being taken from me.

[beaubrewer1977]

Type: Defamation/Libel
Location: Goodhue County, Minnesota (Red Wing, 55066)
Current status: Case Inquiry
Purpose: To determine what I need/should to. If I have a valid case or should I peruse this or disregard this issue.

Hello,

I am Beau and below you will find a brief run down of recent events since Sept 2, 2007. The below false statements resulted in an un-needed OFP/Family File case and the loss of permanent custody (for now temporary loss) of my daughter, un-needed cost, and un-warranted OFP and restraining orders.

Thank you
Beau

Overview and brief Rundown

FYI: "Accuser" is a recent ex-girlfriend who lived with me.

Sun, Sept 2:

1. Accuser arrives home after a 2.5 day party spree. She arrives home and we have consensual sex in the bathroom. Afterwards an argument about me speaking with her Ex-husband (I asked if accuser had a history of cheating or was promiscuous, she had been exhibiting many strange behaviors - long, long story).


Mon, Sept 3:

1. Arguing and bickering continue


Tues, Sept 4:

1. Finally I believe we resolve our argument


Wed, Sept 5:

1. Accuser talks to my ex-girl-fiend (mother of my child). They talk about me being "controlling". I guess this puts accuser over the edge
2. Accuser moves out, and moves into the women's shelter. Accuser has no real friends or family in the near area, her car can not drive more than a few miles to work and back. So the women's shelter was a "quick" fix. Accuser presumably tells the women's shelter that I had sexually assaulted her and physically abused her (in order to gain an immediate temporary place to live) and physically abused my daughter.
3. Since I was accused of physically abusing my daughter, the woman's shelter calls social services (as I later find out by my family lawyer).


Thurs, Sept 6:

1. I am contacted by Social services.
2. I leave work early to resolve this child issue, and meet with social services.
3. I call accuser and briefly speak to her about social services, I inform her that the locks have been changed and she needs to schedule a time to pick up the remainder of her stuff. She promptly texts back, "do not call or text me", in which I have honored. ($25.00 for different locks)
4. Accuser files a retraining order against me for "stalking" however the order reads "harassment". In this order are allegations of physical abuse, phone calls and text messages. (The phone calls and text messages were common and not unique to this day as it appears in the order. Physical abuse never happened. (nor sexual assault, that did not appear on the order).


Fri, Sept 7:

1. My child mother catches wind of this (perhaps social services) and she then files a restraining order, and OFP (for minor child)
2. As I arrive home from work I am served both Orders (5pm). I am not allowed to talk, see, contact my daughter nor anyone else. Court date set for Sept 14.
3. Accusers affidavit for my child's mother is extremely exaggerated truths and lies. Only fuels the reasoning and approval for the Emergency OFP


Mon, Sept 10:

1. I retain my family lawyer ($2000)
2. I tell my employer that I have had two restraining orders placed against me. (I am required to do this, as I work at a casino, and they are very strict about legal complications)


Thurs, Sept 13:

1. I find out that accuser has accused me of sexual assault from my family lawyer who in turns finds out from my child mother's lawyer


Fri, Sept 14:

1. Court: my child's mother and I come to an agreement, and I loose custody of my daughter (temporary [6 month review, for final order]). Under advice of my lawyer we do not speak of any accusations at all (to the court), and negotiate to come to an agreement between myself and my daughters mother. (I guess it is better for the judge not to hear such accusations, as he may deny me anthing)
2. Under the agreement, I have limited unsupervised visits with my daughter, I have to attend therapy (for anger, controlling, sexual issues). Also the OFP has been dropped and this new agreement is in its place. (however the accusers order is still in place)

----------------------------

I have many emails from accuser and myself where we are bickering. Briefly, and in depth touch upon many of the exaggerated and false topics the accuser has made, and in no email or instant message was there ever any word, hint, mention or sign of abuse or assault against/from me, or my daughter.

I have the the OFP (minor child), accusers Restraining order, email chats all in PDF form. I am wondering if I would have a valid case, and should pursue this. the accusers statements have resulted in the custody of my daughter being temporarily taken away for 6 months, and a significant monetary investment to retain a family lawyer for an otherwise unneeded court appearance.

I have 45 days to motion for a hearing for the accusers restraining order as of Sept 7 (expires about October 15)

Thank you for your time.

 

[quincy]

If all of the accusations against you are false, then you have a good basis for a defamation claim against the accuser. The proof needed to show that the allegations are false, however, may be difficult to obtain, as this seems to be a matter of he-said/she-said.

You mentioned that you have already made a significant monetary investment by retaining an attorney. If you are prepared for another significant monetary investment, and a significant investment of your time, you could probably take this ex-friend to court. Consult with the attorney you retained to see if a defamation suit against your ex-girlfriend is worth pursuing. It may not be.

 

[beaubrewer1977]

Libel

Thanks,

I am just feeling out options for now, however I feel I should act rather quickly. Can I, should I decide to peruse it, represent my self, and turn this into a defamation case when/if I motion the court for the accusers restraining order. Or would it be best to not motion the restraining order at all, and proceed with a new defamation/libel motion?

By the way, I have TONS of emails that would/should show that the accusation are false. While not 100% proof, with the context of emails and chat logs I would hope that I would put significant doubt on the accusers claims.

-Beau

 

[quincy]

I believe, because of the costs involved should you lose in court, it would be wise for you to hire an attorney to handle both the restraining order issue between you and your ex-girlfriend, and the defamation suit, should your attorney recommend you pursue it.

You have demonstrated in your post that you have suffered a loss as a result of the defamatory comments made about you, with the temporary loss of custody of your child being the most painful. I am sure that your most important goal right now is to retain custody, and clearing your name through a defamation suit may be just the right course of action to take. It may be the wise course of action to bring to lift the restraining order, as well. But I don't know, and cannot advise you on that. I'm sorry.

Instead, I strongly urge you to have your own attorney represent you in all of the actions you are currently facing, and to advise you on the wisdom of bringing a defamation suit while the custody issue is pending. Your attorney can advise you about the timing that is best for such a suit, should he even think it wise at all.

One additonal note:
I didn't ask before, but I will now: Was there any medical evidence supporting physical or sexual abuse against your ex-girlfriend? Did she visit a doctor or hospital, either before her stay at the domestic abuse shelter or during her stay, perhaps at the urging of abuse shelter workers? If she sought medical help after leaving, this would be important to her defense in any defamation suit, and good indication of her need for the continuance of a restraining order. Make sure you know the answer to that before your hearing.

 

[beaubrewer1977]

One additonal note:
I didn't ask before, but I will now: Was there any medical evidence supporting physical or sexual abuse against your ex-girlfriend?

No. No marks or burises and the consensual sex was about 3-4 days post accusation (I believe anyway, as the records are confidential, I probably never know exact times, only time frames from what I have heard.)

Did she visit a doctor or hospital, either before her stay at the domestic abuse shelter or during her stay, perhaps at the urging of abuse shelter workers?

Not to my knowledge. I did go to the police station and asked for records of my name, my address and the accuser. Nothing came up. (This was done yesterday Sept 20)

If she sought medical help after leaving, this would be important to her defense in any defamation suit, and good indication of her need for the continuance of a restraining order. Make sure you know the answer to that before your hearing.

It's gonna be hard, As most of those records are confidential, and most employees will not speak about or aknowlege the accuser either.

Thanks!

 

[quincy]

I am still urging you to hire an attorney. I think it is important that you have one. The attorney can advise you on what motion to file for the hearing on the restraining order. And, although the September 2 story between you and your ex is a long long one, your attorney may find the details of that day important, since that seems to be when the first indications of trouble arose. The more information your attorney has, even the information that is not necessarily favorable to you, the better prepared and more helpful he will be.

Your September has just really really sucked, hasn't it?

 

[beaubrewer1977]

Thanks, I do not really want to have to motion the court alone, I would like to have an attorney. And I feel it is critical that I clear my name, so these accusations can not be used as "fodder" against me in the future.

Your September has just really really sucked, hasn't it?

Yep.. Almost as bad as this time last year.. But thats a whole different (long) story. I think I am just cursed around this time of year.

But any how, thanks for all the help!

-Beau

 

[Zigner]

The title of your post is misleading. You voluntarily relinquished custody of your daughter.

 

[beaubrewer1977]

The title of your post is misleading. You voluntarily relinquished custody of your daughter.

Yes, and no.. The OFP was issued and she was taken from daycare (I did not even get to say goodbye, and I was not allowed to see or talk to her or anyone else for nearly 10 days).

Then I found out about the assault charge, and it was under my family lawyer advice I not argue anything, with all the other accusation against me. She said that it might only get more dust up in the air, and the court could totally rule against me.. The judge could have said, "There is an abuse charge against the minor child, now there is an abuse charge against the accuser AND an assault charge, Mr. Brewer you have no right to your daughter at this time, until all allegations are cleared, you can not see or talk to your daughter. Until such a time that the court rules otherwise."

My hands were bound, I could have protested the OFP and custody, but ran a large risk of totally loosing her. Or I could have taken the offer in which was presented to me, and resolve the other accusations later, and when the temporary custody comes up for review, perhaps it can/could be reverted back to the way it once was.

So yes the title is a little misleading, and no the title was not. Had these allegations not been brought against me, this would have never happened. My Ex-girlfriend would have just simply broke up with me and moved out, and nothing more (hopefully) like a normal break-up

Regards.

 

[quincy]

It sounds like your attorney is wise, although I am sure the decision to relinguish custody of your daughter was a difficult one.

Good luck.