hlrdrpnghs
Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Iowa
I moved down to FL to be with X, got pregnant 2 1/2 years later while we were in an on again, off again relationship. It was definitely off, and I decided if we weren't going to be together, then I was going to move back home to IA to raise the child around my family. I asked X often if he wanted me to stay, and all his responses were 'Yeah, sort of, but you do what you want to do'. He put up no fight and even helped me pack / move things out of my house. I moved when I was 6 months pregnant. He didn't feel a connection to the unborn child, so at the time, he didn't care. He came up the night before I was set to be induced (I chose an induction so he could watch his son be born, which resulted in a C-section, and a very upsetting labor experience, but it's my own fault.) He stayed for a week, but was constantly out in the barn with my mom (I stayed with her for a year after I moved back) getting drunk. Then he left. That October (baby was 4 months) X and I had made plans for baby and I to go to October for a month. I was still in love with him, so I agreed and thought it would bring us closer. I don't know if he had a girlfriend or what was going on, but X was constantly leaving the house. The next time he saw the baby was in April, he came to Iowa and stayed in my home for 10 days. He was jealous that baby was showing me and my roommate/best friend attention more so than him, so pretty much pouted the whole time. Then X wanted his family to see the baby, so we decided I would go down to FL for 2 weeks. Baby stayed overnight with X more than half of the 14 days, did very well (15 months old, at this point) with his dad, but once we got back to IA, he became very attached and started nursing even more.
Well, tonight, X called and said he wants the baby to go down to FL, without me, for 3 months. I said no way, 3 months is far too long. MAYBE a month, max, but I'd have to think about it.
There was no paternity test, he's on the birth certificate. There is no child support in place, but he does pay, every month, and no visitation agreement set. I was hoping to keep it out of the courts, but not opposed to getting something set. Child support would be higher if court-ordered, anyways. I don't work, but do go to school. I feel that I have been generous as far as uprooting our lives for a couple/few weeks and going to FL to visit X, but I'm done doing that.
There are plenty of jobs up here in his field, but he doesn't want to move here.
My questions are:
If he files to take me to court first, would baby and I have to travel down to FL for hearings?
What is a reasonable visitation schedule for this age?
Where would visitation take place (at this age?) I've researched a little to find that most of the visitations should take place where the mother and child reside..
I moved down to FL to be with X, got pregnant 2 1/2 years later while we were in an on again, off again relationship. It was definitely off, and I decided if we weren't going to be together, then I was going to move back home to IA to raise the child around my family. I asked X often if he wanted me to stay, and all his responses were 'Yeah, sort of, but you do what you want to do'. He put up no fight and even helped me pack / move things out of my house. I moved when I was 6 months pregnant. He didn't feel a connection to the unborn child, so at the time, he didn't care. He came up the night before I was set to be induced (I chose an induction so he could watch his son be born, which resulted in a C-section, and a very upsetting labor experience, but it's my own fault.) He stayed for a week, but was constantly out in the barn with my mom (I stayed with her for a year after I moved back) getting drunk. Then he left. That October (baby was 4 months) X and I had made plans for baby and I to go to October for a month. I was still in love with him, so I agreed and thought it would bring us closer. I don't know if he had a girlfriend or what was going on, but X was constantly leaving the house. The next time he saw the baby was in April, he came to Iowa and stayed in my home for 10 days. He was jealous that baby was showing me and my roommate/best friend attention more so than him, so pretty much pouted the whole time. Then X wanted his family to see the baby, so we decided I would go down to FL for 2 weeks. Baby stayed overnight with X more than half of the 14 days, did very well (15 months old, at this point) with his dad, but once we got back to IA, he became very attached and started nursing even more.
Well, tonight, X called and said he wants the baby to go down to FL, without me, for 3 months. I said no way, 3 months is far too long. MAYBE a month, max, but I'd have to think about it.
There was no paternity test, he's on the birth certificate. There is no child support in place, but he does pay, every month, and no visitation agreement set. I was hoping to keep it out of the courts, but not opposed to getting something set. Child support would be higher if court-ordered, anyways. I don't work, but do go to school. I feel that I have been generous as far as uprooting our lives for a couple/few weeks and going to FL to visit X, but I'm done doing that.
There are plenty of jobs up here in his field, but he doesn't want to move here.
My questions are:
If he files to take me to court first, would baby and I have to travel down to FL for hearings?
What is a reasonable visitation schedule for this age?
Where would visitation take place (at this age?) I've researched a little to find that most of the visitations should take place where the mother and child reside..
