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Marriage Counselor Malpractice

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What is the name of your state? California. Three years ago, my (then) husband and I were going through marriage counseling in a final attempt to save our marriage. Counseling wasn't helping me, so we divorced and went our seperate ways.

I just recently learned that my younger sister attended some counseling sessions with my husband after he and I legally seperated. This was done without my knowledge or consent.

I'm especially outraged by this, because my sister favored my husband through the divorce. Now she and he are friends, and little sis wants absolutely nothing to do with me. As she puts it "You're family, but (husband) is LIKE family."

I have no idea what was discussed during those sessions my sister went to, but much of my family has misconceptions about why I wanted out of the marriage. I would really like to know if there is anyway possible I can get my hands on the counselor's notes regarding the sessions my sister went to?

Also, my co-worker, who has a degree in psychology, says that this family counselor was extremely unethical in her practice, to allow an outside third party to attend without my consent. She also said that this might very well be malpractice.

Other than what may sound like a terrific Jerry Springer episode (which I would never sink so low to participate in), I believe that I might have a malpractice suit here. I would appreciate any thoughts here.



Senior Member
The key words here are "after he and I legally seperated"--your estranged husband was under no obligation to get your approval for anything, neither was his counselor nor your sister.

The only thing you can do now is decide whether or not to continue living a life filled with bitterness and the desire for revenge. I hope you decide to let your sister be friends with whomever she chooses and to let your ex be just that, your ex.
Life is too short to waste today and tomorrow by living in the past.


Well said Ellence, I tend to agree with those exact sentiments.

However I would be weary of your relationship and work on improvements with your sister. I may be shooting at the wrong target here, but it sounds as though your sister is a little stuck on your ex husband and may want to take it farther. If this is something that would not bother you, it may bother her knowing it may bother you and that is why the tension is in the air.

If the two of you get together in some way, either by e-mail, phone or a nice dinner and discuss what outcome both of you are looking for then it may not be a bad idea to be honest with each other. The worst that could happen is that you might actually learn the true feelings of a sibling.
There's so much more to this story than I wanted to share. . .

My ex-hubby had a menage-a-trois with his first wife, AND his wife's sister! One of the reasons why I wanted out of our marriage was because he was pressuring me to have a menage-a-trois as well. He's also indicated to several of my peers that he would be interested in my sister if I was "unavailable". Frankly, this entire scenario completely disgusts me.

My ex is 24 years older than me, and 27 years older than my sister. I didn't see this before (of course not, I loved him), but he's really a "dirty old man" who likes to control and manipulate.

I really don't believe that my sister has any romantic interest in my ex. She just completely supported him through the seperation because he told her lies about me. I choose to take the higher road, and not reveal his indescretions to those who we knew.

My sister doesn't want anything to do with me because she believed his lies. Unfortunately, I've tried to level with her . . . she just refuses to sit and talk. We've had several family emergencies recently, and she still refuses to communicate with me.

Both of you have excellent advise, and I thank you. I just wish my sister really understood what had gone on.


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