Mil Div/Last Minute change to Adultry Yes/NO

[pb1963]

My husband is AD in Mil. Deployed this year for a total of months. Came home after 1st deployment 5/04 wanting divorce, wanting divorce. I went on vacation in 7/04 and come home and he suddenly stops coming home at all and one day with no explanation yet all of his stuff was still here. Mid August he has TDY and with what I now know to be girlfriend who is in his unit and was deployed with him in Jan - May. I filed for divorce in Sept but filed "irrec diff" rather than adultry because I didn't feel as though she was the reason for the divorce....he was deployed again 10/04 - 1/05 and we have had 4 or 5 agreements passed back and forth between attornies. We have finally agreed however there is a possibility I have serious medical problems and being that I was laid off from my job in January my lawyer instructed me not to sign the agreement because of the medical insurance issue. I will have no medical insurance. When his attorney found out about this he instructed my husband to file a motion to enforce the agreement even though I hadn't signed and even though both realize I will be left without coverage. Do I have any recourse? My attorney hasn't returned my calls and I really think he is just about useless anyway.....HELP??????

Also, can I change my original complaint to adultry at this late date?

What can I do to make sure I have medical coverage.....I am not trying to prevent the divorce, but he is trying to get remarried before being deployed again to get the extra money. HELLLLPPPPP?

 

[keyzblewz]

How long were you and your husband married? Unless you were married for at least 20 years there is no way you will retain your military health benefits.

Based on the length of the marriage you could have your attorney request that your husband carry health insurance on you for a rehabilitative period of time.

At this point all you can do is delay the divorce by dragging your feet but that won't solve the problem of medical benefits. Sorry

 

[pb1963]

Yes I understand in that we have be married just under 10 years.

My real question is that being that I have a potentially serious medical issue, just being diagnosed in the last month, would a judge sign the motion to enforce leaving me with no coverage?

 

[Shay-Pari'e]

Yes I understand in that we have be married just under 10 years.

My real question is that being that I have a potentially serious medical issue, just being diagnosed in the last month, would a judge sign the motion to enforce leaving me with no coverage?

I'm sorry your ill, but you are not getting the point.

The insurance he has carried is through the "Deer's" program, and a judge in the civilian world has no authority to ask the military to keep you covered.

The military cannot cover you once divorced, with a marraige this short. You do not qualify for it. If he was retired and you divorced, that would be a different ball game.

Your best bet is to request through your attorney that he pick up alternate insurance, because you simply cannot use his military insurance if divorced.

Your children can, but you can't.

 

[pb1963]

Will judge sign knowing I have no insurance?

I'm sorry your ill, but you are not getting the point.

The insurance he has carried is through the "Deer's" program, and a judge in the civilian world has no authority to ask the military to keep you covered.

The military cannot cover you once divorced, with a marraige this short. You do not qualify for it. If he was retired and you divorced, that would be a different ball game.

Your best bet is to request through your attorney that he pick up alternate insurance, because you simply cannot use his military insurance if divorced.

Your children can, but you can't.

Will the judge sign the motion with the knowledge of my situation? My attorney said there was no way, but advised me not the sign the agreement. I did have an additional amendment to the agreement that I chose not to have him do based on his confidence in the fact that no matter whether they filed that motion or not that it would not be approved.

 

[LdiJ]

Will the judge sign the motion with the knowledge of my situation? My attorney said there was no way, but advised me not the sign the agreement. I did have an additional amendment to the agreement that I chose not to have him do based on his confidence in the fact that no matter whether they filed that motion or not that it would not be approved.

Judges will sometimes "continue" a divorce when there are serious medical issues that would leave one of the parties without medical insurance. However the judge won't do it indefinitely. Otherwise, the suggestions that have been given by others are your only real alternatives.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

No one can answer your questions without the facts.
In what state is your divorce?
What is the medical condition?
How long have you been married, do you have children, assets?
Are you on disability and or filing for disability?
Do you realize that changing from Irr Dif to Adultery would cause him to be dishonerably discharged from the military and affect your future income and insurance, just a thought, you know about cutting off your nose to spite your face.

 

[Kansas4me]

No one can answer your questions without the facts.
In what state is your divorce?
What is the medical condition?
How long have you been married, do you have children, assets?
Are you on disability and or filing for disability?
Do you realize that changing from Irr Dif to Adultery would cause him to be dishonerably discharged from the military and affect your future income and insurance, just a thought, you know about cutting off your nose to spite your face.

But as it was said earlier since she hasn't been married 20 years to him she will get nothing from him in way of future income or insurance fromthe military. Odds are she won't get much in the way of any income military or non since she was married less than 10 years. No kids were mentioned and seeing as how they are a big part of this, I would assume there are none.

As for him getting dishonerably discharged, he did the crime..........Maybe he should have thought of his nose when he was commiting adultery.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

But as it was said earlier since she hasn't been married 20 years to him she will get nothing from him in way of future income or insurance fromthe military. Odds are she won't get much in the way of any income military or non since she was married less than 10 years. No kids were mentioned and seeing as how they are a big part of this, I would assume there are none.

As for him getting dishonerably discharged, he did the crime..........Maybe he should have thought of his nose when he was commiting adultery.

None of what you said has any relevence without knowing the state so that advice can be given with appropriate state laws referenced instead of guessing what might or not apply, military is not the only consideration and states differ insofar as what is a long term marriage and if spousal support is awarded.

 

[pb1963]

The state is Georgia.

I am hypothyriod and had my thyroid removed years ago due to a cold nodule. Starting in Jan 04 through now I have had pnemonia 4 times and lost my voice numerous times for sometimes a whole month at a time. 3 weeks ago the Dr.s determined I had stones in my submandibular gland (middle salivary gland) and today I found out I have Many nodules in my throat.......they counted 12. Some history, irrelevant as it may be, it matters to me. I was laid off in January from a Gov't Contractor after 5 years. I moved us here for him and school and took a large severance package after 11 years at a large Boston company. This explanation only has personal relevance basically but answers some of your questions. We were married for 9 years. I didn't ask for any of his retirement. I was always the major breadwinner. He has had his girlfriend send me e-mails as if it was him today regarding the insurance and other things......I never had an issue with the adultry until now. He has no problem leaving me with nothing....today he mailed and put certain conditions on staying married a little longer so I would have health coverage. I honestly don't know how to respond to such a thing.......

I could be wrong but I believe that the GA National Guard falls under State Law in most cases.....if that helps....or if I am correct.
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