Misuse of a Telephone

[LnWilson]

I have recently changed my phone number. My boyfriend has a child by another woman(8yrs ago). She has done nothing but harrass us with hang-up calls and obscene lang. I have wrote down all the times she has called and what was said. I called the police and it worked out that when he arrived she was calling again. He told her not to call again. What can be done if this happens again. I live in Ohio and she lives in Texas?

 

[Always searching]

This worked for me. Call the telephone company and request a new phone number because you are being harrassed. Sometimes they won't charge you the $65.00 or so to change your number if there is a problem. Now, get it unlisted. It costs around a dollar for that a month. Don't call her or don't have your boyfriend call her directly from your phone. If he calls her from your phone, then it will pick up on her caller id. That is another thing. Do you have a caller ID? Get one. If it is her number or an unrecognized number, then don't answer it. You have to be in control of your phone. You pay the bill. You have the right to talk or not to talk with anyone you want. People think that it is a rule that can't be broken that you MUST answer the phone. Once you realize that you are not obligated to answer the phone at all, then your life will be free of aggravation from her or whomever you don't want to talk to. Get an answering machine. Never answer the phone. Let it be a recording..."We are sorry but we can't come to the phone. If you want me to return your phone call, please leave a name, number and a time to return your call." Then if she rants and raves, you have it all on the recorder. Use it against her. Get pro-active instead of being on the defensive. She isn't next door so she won't be in your face. YOU have the control. YOU have the power. She doesn't.

I had one more thought...don't engage yourself in conversation with her. Just don't do it. Who is winning if she gets you into an argument? She is. My favorite saying (and I learned it when I was having problems with my husband's ex) is

DON'T GET INTO A PISS FIGHT WITH A SKUNK BECAUSE YOU WILL END UP SMELLING LIKE A SKUNK.

[This message has been edited by Always searching (edited August 23, 2000).]

 

[keeshy2]

Call your phone company! I was getting harassing phone calls, and used *69 each time. I called the phone company with the offending numbers & they put a block on those numbers - turned out to be an ex-boyfriend. If anyone tried to call me from that number they got a recording that said "The number you have dialed does not accept calls from the number you are calling from". The person got the hint, and stopped calling shortly afterwards.

 

[LnWilson]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Always searching:
This worked for me. Call the telephone company and request a new phone number because you are being harrassed. Sometimes they won't charge you the $65.00 or so to change your number if there is a problem. Now, get it unlisted. It costs around a dollar for that a month. Don't call her or don't have your boyfriend call her directly from your phone. If he calls her from your phone, then it will pick up on her caller id. That is another thing. Do you have a caller ID? Get one. If it is her number or an unrecognized number, then don't answer it. You have to be in control of your phone. You pay the bill. You have the right to talk or not to talk with anyone you want. People think that it is a rule that can't be broken that you MUST answer the phone. Once you realize that you are not obligated to answer the phone at all, then your life will be free of aggravation from her or whomever you don't want to talk to. Get an answering machine. Never answer the phone. Let it be a recording..."We are sorry but we can't come to the phone. If you want me to return your phone call, please leave a name, number and a time to return your call." Then if she rants and raves, you have it all on the recorder. Use it against her. Get pro-active instead of being on the defensive. She isn't next door so she won't be in your face. YOU have the control. YOU have the power. She doesn't.

I had one more thought...don't engage yourself in conversation with her. Just don't do it. Who is winning if she gets you into an argument? She is. My favorite saying (and I learned it when I was having problems with my husband's ex) is

DON'T GET INTO A PISS FIGHT WITH A SKUNK BECAUSE YOU WILL END UP SMELLING LIKE A SKUNK.

[This message has been edited by Always searching (edited August 23, 2000).]<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Thanks for the GOOD advise and I will use it.

 

[LnWilson]

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by keeshy2:
Call your phone company! I was getting harassing phone calls, and used *69 each time. I called the phone company with the offending numbers & they put a block on those numbers - turned out to be an ex-boyfriend. If anyone tried to call me from that number they got a recording that said "The number you have dialed does not accept calls from the number you are calling from". The person got the hint, and stopped calling shortly afterwards.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Thanks for the reply, I'm going to call the phone co. today. :0)

 

[dsut]

One excellent option is to contact the law enforcement agency responsible for your area, like police or sheriff. Tell them what's going on and odds are they will then fax a complaint to your phone company and your phone company will then, at no cost to you, put an incoming call trace on your line for upto several months. While several months is a while, if she calls you, the phone company then has it on record. You in turn write down when she calls or when a harassing call comes through. After the time limit is through the phone company provides the list of incoming calls to the cops and they then decide if charges can be brought up. And please keep in mind that you should stay in contact with the cops about the list you're compiling. Give them photo copies of the list. While the charge is mostly a misdemenor, it can be a very important move on your behalf. Of course, while I expect this to be the standard nation wide, it could very well be different in your state. Talk to a detective about this, he or she should be able to help you. And certainly do change your number. But not have it unlisted though. Go unpublished. Unlisted numbers can still be accessed through 555-1212 while unpublished numbers cannot be accessed unless ordered by court.

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I ain't a lawyer. I ain't a copper. I'm a true blue American that believes in Freedom for all. Provided they ain't criminals.