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Slimsbabyyy

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? California.

I'm thinking of asking for a modification since it's been 4 years since the child support order and there is a change in circumstance. I was working full time at the time of the order and now I am on SSDI. I have full custody of our 2 kids. He pays $490 a month for both and sees them once or twice every few months.

What I'm asking is... on the finance questionnaire, is my disability amount considered as the income amount? It says to list employer and show stubs, which of course, I don't have because I'm on disability. Being on disability would be considered a change, right? Because I'm definitely not receiving what I would be if I were working.

Any advice is appreciated. Thank you.
 


I live in Texas, but as far as I know you can apply for cost of living increases no more than once a year. Since it has been four years and your circumstances have changed you possibly should. Has his income increased?? Even though he doesn't see the kids often, sometimes when faced with the issue of spending out more money a man would rather fight for custody, and end up ulimately neglecting the needs of the children, especially where attention is concerned. If he hasn't had much time with them he really doesn't know them. Are they of legal age to decide which parent they want to live with? if they are than he will generally waste money fighting for them, or buying them off, or try to manipulate their feelings and try to make you look like a very negative, and negelectful parent yourself. Those are just some things to consider before acting. People can often care more about what's in their wallet, than the love that is in their home and heart. If you do have a decent relationship, you can always ask him if he would be able to afford an extra 100- whatever a month, and get it signed agreed upon and filed without worrying about the hastle of catching him off gaurd?? I hope this helps some.
 
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Slimsbabyyy

Junior Member
California-

Yes, his income has increased. I'm not exactly sure how much he makes, but I know it has increased. He's been working at the same job now for 4-5 years.

He is not one to fight for custody. I will say that he loves his kids, but he just doesn't know how to be a father. When I first stopped working, I did ask him to take care of the kids for awhile, he had them for 3 months and he wasn't feeding them very well, he was leaving them with his niece while he would go out with friends and stuff. My son's grades went from A's and B's to 1 D and the rest F's. All within 3 months! So I know he can't handle the responsibility. And he knows it too, so that's why I say he's not one to fight me for custody.

I know that I can't ask him for extra because he feels like he pays enough. He would just argue with me and I really don't want to deal with it. I'd rather it go through the DA and he can see for himself the amount that they may come up with. He pays $245 for each child. There's 2 of them. They're 7 and 12. So no, not old enough to decide, plus, I don't even think that would be an issue.

I'm a bit nervous too, because even though I'm on disability, I'm getting much lower than I was making when I was working and he is making more, I'm afraid he would lie on his paperwork. And what if it ends up decreasing! Ugh! He is the type to lie on the paperwork too. For the past 3 years, he has claimed the kids on his taxes even after I already have. So that will eventually catch up to him too.

Thanks for the help and advice...
 
Well since both he and you know that he cannot handle the responsibility of being a full time father, I would say give it a shot. The oldest child is 12? in Texas that is the legal age to decide. Usually they will ask the oldest child and also keep the kids together. If your 12 year old knows how great of a parent you are and remembers the living situation with their dad, it would be a good idea to try to get this in the works before the child gets much older and into the teen age phases.

Also your ex could try to lie about his income but usually they have to show past check stubs (you can call the attorney general for clarification here they do). Also the worst it can do is stay the same (at least here), I was doing some research, because my husband and I were having problems and he didn't want to pay as much child support as the state said was max, and I felt that it would only be fair. He told me he would get a job making much lower (like only 7.50 working for a movie theater or something goofy. Which is more than a 50 percent drop) so that he wouldn't have to pay me as much. He had it planned out, that after the case was settled he would go ahead and find a better paying job! I was extremely irritated about that, I think he should think his kid was worth more. I found out that here in Texas they look at it in depth, and if it looks as if you are purposely trying to get out of paying child-support, or trying to pay less, they will make you pay the amount of what your actual income was before the change. I thought that was great, and later when the subject came up I told him to go ahead and try!!! So hopefully the laws are similar there. I would recommend you doing your own research. Best of luck... and keep me posted, I will respond to you if I think of anything else, or if you post something else that my two cents feel like spinning... lol

By the way, my husband and I are working things out, and I hope things keep getting better.
 

Shay-Pari'e

Senior Member
I really don't know why Solutions is getting off track here, but the bottom line is that you are well within your rights to motion for a change of support.
 
--PARIDISE-- said:
I really don't know why Solutions is getting off track here, but the bottom line is that you are well within your rights to motion for a change of support.

I guess you would see that because you are the type of person that leaps and then looks to realize you have a mile drop into the Grand Canyon. I am the type of person who looks and weights options of situations. She was concerned that if the case takes place her husband may lower the support. I was sharing what I learned and how I learned what I learned in my own state, and suggested that she does the research for her own state. Sometimes people need more than their own thoughts to go on especially when faced with unsure outcomes. I was trying to help her not to be so unsure and to take uncertainties away, by sharing and offering her to see what her laws are. It is called reassurance.

As for your hampster, apparently he doesn't see the whole picture.
And as long as you are just going to work everyday you will probably never make the Forbes list of richest people. Think of how you feel when you miss a day without pay?? You need to find ways to help create income. Hopefully maybe you can open your mind and see other things as well.
 
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Shay-Pari'e

Senior Member
solutions41201 said:
I guess you would see that because you are the type of person that leaps and then looks to realize you have a mile drop into the Grand Canyon. I am the type of person who looks and weights options of situations. She was concerned that if the case takes place her husband may lower the support. I was sharing what I learned and how I learned what I learned in my own state, and suggested that she does the research for her own state. Sometimes people need more than their own thoughts to go on especially when faced with unsure outcomes. I was trying to help her not to be so unsure and to take uncertainties away, by sharing and offering her to see what her laws are. It is called reassurance.

As for your hampster, apparently he doesn't see the whole picture.
And as long as you are just going to work everyday you will probably never make the Forbes list of richest people. Think of how you feel when you miss a day without pay?? You need to find ways to help create income. Hopefully maybe you can open your mind and see other things as well.
Oh God! Your more of an idiot that we thought.
 
--PARIDISE-- said:
Oh God! Your more of an idiot that we thought.
I guess you are talking of yourself. You make this forum a mean and horrible place... but I guess that is where freedom comes you... you are as free to sound like a cad and a jerk as you like. I know and you know, and anyone who really pays attention knows, you don't know what you are talking about.

I hope you learn how to be a decent human being.
 

Shay-Pari'e

Senior Member
solutions41201 said:
I guess you are talking of yourself. You make this forum a mean and horrible place... but I guess that is where freedom comes you... you are as free to sound like a cad and a jerk as you like. I know and you know, and anyone who really pays attention knows, you don't know what you are talking about.

I hope you learn how to be a decent human being.
This is a legal forum. You have shown your stupidity, and you should not be responding to others questions. You are simply wrong with your answers, EVERY ANSWER, and it effects the people looking for real legal advice.

You have no legal back ground and you are all over this site giving wrong info,

Can't you log off and find Romper Room?
 
--PARIDISE-- said:
This is a legal forum. You have shown your stupidity, and you should not be responding to others questions. You are simply wrong with your answers, EVERY ANSWER, and it effects the people looking for real legal advice.

You have no legal back ground and you are all over this site giving wrong info,

Can't you log off and find Romper Room?
How in the world do you know, what it is I know and what I don't know. If people are unsure about things, strictly asking on a forum and not ever following up with their own research is somewhat ignorant to me. I simply say the facts of my own state and encourage people to do their own research. Telling someone to just do something, it like leading some one off a bride (which apparently is what you like to do). If someone does their own research and knows what and where to look they know without a doubt what their rights and limitations are. You must be offended because you have no brain to encourage people to look and think for themselves, and I do. Why don't you go back to reading your outdated law-books and stop pretending to know everything, before your advice leads someone into trouble. At least I suggest that people do their own state research. You just put down. Your job must put you in a lousy mood, I would quit and find something else to do.
 

Shay-Pari'e

Senior Member
solutions41201 said:
How in the world do you know, what it is I know and what I don't know. If people are unsure about things, strictly asking on a forum and not ever following up with their own research is somewhat ignorant to me. I simply say the facts of my own state and encourage people to do their own research. Telling someone to just do something, it like leading some one off a bride (which apparently is what you like to do). If someone does their own research and knows what and where to look they know without a doubt what their rights and limitations are. You must be offended because you have no brain to encourage people to look and think for themselves, and I do. Why don't you go back to reading your outdated law-books and stop pretending to know everything, before your advice leads someone into trouble. At least I suggest that people do their own state research. You just put down. Your job must put you in a lousy mood, I would quit and find something else to do.
Thats cute and all, but you are obviously very uneducated, and seem to like embarrassing yourself with every post you put out on this site.

Night Night little girl.


https://forum.freeadvice.com/search.php?do=finduser&userid=246389
 
--PARIDISE-- said:
Thats cute and all, but you are obviously very uneducated, and seem to like embarrassing yourself with every post you put out on this site.

Night Night little girl.

You haven't proven yourself to be very educated yourself. You are the Naive type that think there is only one answer for everyone and every situation. This is the real world and unfortunately it isn't that simple... Wake up, it is the morning... apparently you are delirious from lack of sleep, maybe you need to get in your betty boop pj's and get some rest!
 

Shay-Pari'e

Senior Member
solutions41201 said:
You haven't proven yourself to be very educated yourself. You are the Naive type that think there is only one answer for everyone and every situation. This is the real world and unfortunately it isn't that simple... Wake up, it is the morning... apparently you are delirious from lack of sleep, maybe you need to get in your betty boop pj's and get some rest!
https://forum.freeadvice.com/search.php?do=finduser&userid=246389
 
https://forum.freeadvice.com/search.php?searchid=683638

Yeah I can do the same thing... Though however long, I read through yours, and I will give you my free yet truthful psych evaluation. You think you know it all. You cannot admit when you are wrong, so you either don't respond again (instead of politely saying, "sorry, I don't know") or you use names to put people down. You think you feel highly (or at least act as though you do) but in reality you doubt yourself often, and take it out on others by lashing out and calling names. Do you honestly think it is healthy to be so negative? It isn't, in fact it is a serious problem that can often lead to ultimate failure. In fact it seems as though you have nothing better to do with your free time that actually put down and argue with people you will ultimately never meet. How incredibly sad you and your life must be. I hope you get help.
 
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LdiJ

Senior Member
solutions41201 said:
The oldest child is 12? in Texas that is the legal age to decide
This statement is completely wrong. 12 is the age when a judge may give some weight to the child's wishes, but the child certainly does not get "to decide".
 

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