Modification needed....Divorce is not final though..

[crazyeights]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? MI

Hello,

I have sent an email to my lawyer a few days ago regarding this issue but haven't heard anything as of yet. I was hoping I could get some quick insight here.

So far, my stbxh and I have come to an agreement through mediation. The papers have been filed along with the Final Divorce Decree. He has been served and has signed and returned what was needed. We are waiting on a court date now to see the judge.

Just after Thanksgiving, I was hired through a temp agency and more recently, hired permanently. Because of this, I know that a modification is needed for spousal and child support and possibly a few other things. My questions/issues would be:

1. Will we have to start the process over or is it as simple as changing the figures in the decree?

2. I'm a little nervous about doing this until I feel stable in this new position (60-90 days, I'm thinking). Talked with stbx and he is agreeable. I would hate to have it modified, only to then have to modify it again. There is also the issue of #3...

3. I wasn't necessarily looking at working fulltime as I wanted/need to go to school. My current job is no way near a "career". With my current situation, there is no way I can go to school fulltime while working fulltime. If I was to find a part-time job to enable me to go to school fulltime, (say in September) would a judge frown upon this? btw, my husband received a masters through our marriage and I was a sahm. I'm 46 and would like to go to school before I get too much older. I just can't help wondering if I'm not shooting myself in the foot by not going to school now as financially I would able to. Time wise though would be hard and I'm afraid that I would be just setting myself up for failure, either for my girls, my job or my studies. Has anyone had to make a decision such as this???

Thanks for any insight.

crazyeights

 

[mistoffolees]

You have a full time job at the present time. If you voluntarily and deliberately go back to part time, the judge could (and very well might) impute your income to be whatever you were making full time. Don't do it.

As for timing, I would think you'd want to submit the changes BEFORE your court hearing. Once the final decree is issued, it's harder and more expensive to get a change - particularly in the spousal support side. If you don't submit the changes, you also have the risk of the whole thing blowing up. You get to court and your stbx tells the judge that you're now working so he wants a change and you're suddenly looking at contested issues rather than a mediated settlement.

As for the future? The court isn't going to take the position that "she's only been at the job 2 months, so let's wait to see if it works out". No one's job is truly secure and the court doesn't want to have to use a crystal ball. They rule on the basis of CURRENT situation.

 

[LdiJ]

You have a full time job at the present time. If you voluntarily and deliberately go back to part time, the judge could (and very well might) impute your income to be whatever you were making full time. Don't do it.

As for timing, I would think you'd want to submit the changes BEFORE your court hearing. Once the final decree is issued, it's harder and more expensive to get a change - particularly in the spousal support side. If you don't submit the changes, you also have the risk of the whole thing blowing up. You get to court and your stbx tells the judge that you're now working so he wants a change and you're suddenly looking at contested issues rather than a mediated settlement.

As for the future? The court isn't going to take the position that "she's only been at the job 2 months, so let's wait to see if it works out". No one's job is truly secure and the court doesn't want to have to use a crystal ball. They rule on the basis of CURRENT situation.

I am going to disagree with this advice.

It appears that you and your stbx are cooperative and civil with each other. You clearly don't want to be unfair to him, and he seems to agree that giving you some time to be settled is ok.

Therefore, if you want to let things go through the way they are now, for simplicity's sake, and then do a voluntary modification after you are more settled, and you and your stbx are both ok with that, its not a problem. It would be relatively simple. If he changes his mind about agreeing, its also not a big problem, since you clearly want to be fair. You just agree to adjust the numbers now if he changes his mind.

After that, what you do about school is completely your decision, as long as you understand that your then ex will not be required to pay any more than what has been agreed upon. You may need to take out additional student loans to help cover living expenses, but that will be your decision.

 

[notoversteppin]

I just wanted to tell you that it IS possible to work full-time and go to school full-time. I have been doing it since August of last year and I even managed somehow to end the last semester with a 4.0gpa. Do you know what you want to do for a career? Many programs are offered now that accomodate adults that are working full-time. I have a mixture of online classes and evening classes right now. Just look into all of your options and see what's available before dismissing the idea entirely.