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mom and kids want to move

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sissy404

Guest
Pennsylvania I have joint custody with ex, and physical custody of 2 kids. I am the custodial parent. Which really means nothing here in this commonwealth of PA. I was married for 8 yrs. Divorced for 8 years. Kept to every agreement. My kids are 14, and 13. Honor roll students. My family all of them live in Arizonia. They have been there for all of this time. I can never go see them or the children either. I went 5 yrs ago, he knew 6 months in advance, and 2 weeks before the trip.....he charged me with kidnapping!!!!! He lied, and I had to go to a hearing before I left or I wouldnt be able to go.....my attorney did a crap job and blew me off....I was a bus driver for the state at that time, for handicapped children, and discrimated against. My problem now is this......HIS FAMILY LIVES IN NEW jERSEY, controlling, and so is my ex....they never give permission for the kids to see my family, I want to move to arizonia....he has harrassed me here, I have no family support here at all....Ive worked 4 jobs to keep food on the table, my children want to go, Ive indured hardship after hardship here. My kids support me, they feel their civil rights are being violated. Ive moved from rental to rental...can not afford the area anymore....I have to move right now, and cannot find a decent place to live. I make to much for welfare, but not enough to live here. I have a job and house and 16 relatives waiting for us in arizonia. Also, His family never gives, takes, or does anything for my kids ever!!!!!! Just controls our lives..misery loves co. $2000. for an attorney here..and theres no gaurantees. 16 yrs for them ...... nothing for me and my family!! I'm BEING HELD PRISONER IN PA Also, we asked him very nice if we could move, come to any agreement as far as visitation, he always pays child support, but he is controlling to me and my children. Over the past 2 weeks, he has metally abused the kids, saying he will never see them again if they move and questions their love and does not listen to their views at all. He is controlling ,insecure, a bully, that gets everything his and his familys way...He moved here 2 yrs. ago to the same town we are in. Puts me down to the kids. I put up with it for the kids when they were small...but they are older now and I've had enough.......Please any suggestions or anyone knowing PA law........???????? In addition I have been a great mom, always supporting and putting the childrens needs first. It shows because my children are smart and confident. Their dad lays guilt on them and we will go to court over this issue also. please make any suggestion that could help us in getting our move approved. I think in PA, 2 attorneys told me they do not use the childs wishes to make their final decision.
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Unfortunately

If Dad won't agree to the move, your only choice is to take it to court. You're going to need to show why it would be in the kids' best interests to make the move. If the judge denies it, you should ask to be permitted to take the kids on vacation out of state should you so choose.

Good luck.
 
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sissy404

Guest
I will try to prove the best interest for the children. I am hoping they will see that I can't afford to live here. I will show my taxes from the last eight yrs. I still think my children rights have been violated by never being able to visit their other family. I too feel my civil rights as a mother would be in violation, because I can move, just not with the children. And I am a mother, what mother would leave their children. Do you understand? I not only think this is and a family legal issue, but could be also a civil rights issue. How could they say tough luck to us if I could make double the income? I will make the vacation request too if denied. Thanks.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
I don't think you're going to get anywhere claiming this as a civil rights issue - you chose this man as the father of your children, and you cannot, by your actions disrupt his ability to maintain a relationship with them. Your family could have come to visit you in PA, had they wanted to sometime over the past 8 years, surely. Having children severely restricts your freedom. You can try claiming civil rights violations, but I'm betting the judge will throw it out immediately and you won't do yourself any good by pissing him/her off.
 
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sissy404

Guest
Ok thanks, thats what I wanted to hear ....The truth.....I wasnt sure if I would be looked at as " grasping at straws". Now, my family has visited when they could.....like all of us, bills, home and work, would not allow constant travel each year. Do you think at the age my children are, if I say each summer will be his with the kids, and whatever holidays he wants....I may have a chance? I'm starting my daughter and myself in counseling tomarrow, its our first appointment....because, since I asked for the permission, my daughter told me of things that went on in his house ( mental abuse- degrading me constantly). She kept to herself so as not to start trouble. I will use this too, This is not fair to her. Last week he told me on the phone " you will never win" so now I relise this is a big power ego trip for him. How sad for my kids. Any more advice I gladly welcome.
 

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