Mom's gone crazy

[Chardog]

What is the name of your state? CA

I served BM with paternity papers, since she's been avoiding it, I asked her if she received the papers... she went nuts.

For the past month, I've been seeing my son for 50% of the time, 2 weeks 4 days and 2 weeks 3 days. Now she wont let me see my son at all. 0.

She wont allow me paternity, and now, she wont allow me to see my son at all. I cant speak to my lawyer till tuesday since he is leaving town. What do I do? I see this as an emergency.

btw, my son will be staying at his grandma's house; she's on welfare and cheating the system by letter her older daughter live and help her with bills. Should I report them?

 

[SeekChrist]

Other than cheating the system, how is the physical and mental health of the child while being in her custody? If your lawyer is back on Tuesday, I would suggest waiting for him before filing a temporary emergency order.

 

[Chardog]

Other than cheating the system, how is the physical and mental health of the child while being in her custody? If your lawyer is back on Tuesday, I would suggest waiting for him before filing a temporary emergency order.

last year, we both agreed that her mother was not fit to raise our child. we gave the sole responsibility to my aunt, for at least half a year. Her mother did not want to babysit.

bm's sister lives with grandma, she's alleged accessory to murder committed by her bf. She has an ongoing case with the murder suspect STILL ON THE LOOSE. My son is residing there and I dont think it's safe.

 

[CJane]

What do you propose basing this 'emergency' motion on? There's no court order for custody/visitation and you're not legally the child's father.

 

[Chardog]

What do you propose basing this 'emergency' motion on? There's no court order for custody/visitation and you're not legally the child's father.

how can there be custody or visitation when she's been hiding from paternity papers? I've been try to serve her since I filed it beginning of the month. Did you come here to bash or help

 

[CJane]

how can there be custody or visitation when she's been hiding from paternity papers? I've been try to serve her since I filed it beginning of the month. Did you come here to bash or help

You've BEEN 'helped' in multiple threads. You've been told EXACTLY what you need to do to file for paternity/custody/visitation. You've been told what to expect in court.

And whether you like it or not, you're going to have to have a REASON to file an emergency motion, and as of this moment, you're not even this child's father.

And jsut to give you some perspective. My son is 8 months old. A request to establish paternity was filed in court in April. I JUST NOW got the information re: the testing facility from the ex's attorney. HE requested the testing and HE claims that I'm 'hiding' but HIS attorney is JUST NOW setting things up so the testing can be done.

Plan for the long haul, and take some responsibility for the fact that YOU waited this long to file anything.

 

[Chardog]

You've BEEN 'helped' in multiple threads. You've been told EXACTLY what you need to do to file for paternity/custody/visitation. You've been told what to expect in court.

And whether you like it or not, you're going to have to have a REASON to file an emergency motion, and as of this moment, you're not even this child's father.

And jsut to give you some perspective. My son is 8 months old. A request to establish paternity was filed in court in April. I JUST NOW got the information re: the testing facility from the ex's attorney. HE requested the testing and HE claims that I'm 'hiding' but HIS attorney is JUST NOW setting things up so the testing can be done.

Plan for the long haul, and take some responsibility for the fact that YOU waited this long to file anything.

ok, what would you do without your child? I've already filed like suggested

 

[CJane]

ok, what would you do without your child? I've already filed like suggested

You file. And then you wait. The process is SLOW. In the mean time, you try to actually communicate with mom and arrange times to see your child. And you be HAPPY with whatever she offers. Because (and I know you've been told this) she's NEVER been under ANY obligation to let you spend ANY TIME AT ALL with that child, and she has - quite a lot of time. So perhaps you should start with a thank you.

If I was without my children because I'd fired my attorney and waited forever to establish myself as a parent with legal rights, I'd be kicking the crap out of myself.

 

[Chardog]

You file. And then you wait. The process is SLOW. In the mean time, you try to actually communicate with mom and arrange times to see your child. And you be HAPPY with whatever she offers. Because (and I know you've been told this) she's NEVER been under ANY obligation to let you spend ANY TIME AT ALL with that child, and she has - quite a lot of time. So perhaps you should start with a thank you.

If I was without my children because I'd fired my attorney and waited forever to establish myself as a parent with legal rights, I'd be kicking the crap out of myself.

you're not quite the independent thinker I would think you to be. Apparently you are dictated by men and the laws they create. If you've been through this situation, then you obviously know that "status quo" plays into legal matter.

You're statement is ignorant to believe that the mother is somehow the higher authority in the role of parenthood. For the most part, I've taken care of my son MORE than bm has. I pay for his diapers, cloths, and the food he eats... you should know this already since you've followed my past threads.

common sense would lead you to believe that the parent that spends more money and spends more time with the child should have priority. Wouldnt you say that's common sense, or do you like believing in the beauracracy that has failed america?

Common sense isnt all that common

What dont you understand about my case? I've already filed? You've came here to shamelessly bash. Did your ex hubby hurt you that bad? why take it on me? take it up on him

 

[ceara19]

you're not quite the independent thinker I would think you to be. Apparently you are dictated by men and the laws they create. If you've been through this situation, then you obviously know that "status quo" plays into legal matter.

You're statement is ignorant to believe that the mother is somehow the higher authority in the role of parenthood. For the most part, I've taken care of my son MORE than bm has. I pay for his diapers, cloths, and the food he eats... you should know this already since you've followed my past threads.

common sense would lead you to believe that the parent that spends more money and spends more time with the child should have priority. Wouldnt you say that's common sense, or do you like believing in the beauracracy that has failed america?

Common sense isnt all that common

What dont you understand about my case? I've already filed? You've came here to shamelessly bash. Did your ex hubby hurt you that bad? why take it on me? take it up on him

The status quo only comes into play AFTER paternity is established and your case goes in front of a judge. Your not going to get an EMERGENCY order for custody or visitation unless the child is in IMMEDIATE danger. Even if you can prove this, since paternity has not yet been established, you are going to need the assistance of an attorney.

 

[stealth2]

you're not quite the independent thinker I would think you to be. Apparently you are dictated by men and the laws they create. If you've been through this situation, then you obviously know that "status quo" plays into legal matter.

You're statement is ignorant to believe that the mother is somehow the higher authority in the role of parenthood. For the most part, I've taken care of my son MORE than bm has. I pay for his diapers, cloths, and the food he eats... you should know this already since you've followed my past threads.

common sense would lead you to believe that the parent that spends more money and spends more time with the child should have priority. Wouldnt you say that's common sense, or do you like believing in the beauracracy that has failed america?

Common sense isnt all that common

What dont you understand about my case? I've already filed? You've came here to shamelessly bash. Did your ex hubby hurt you that bad? why take it on me? take it up on him

LOL Didn't get the response you wanted, so now you go into attack mode? Good luck getting more help here.

 

[Ambr]

I don't know how you are doing the paternity testing, but guarantee if you show up as pop you will be responsible for the costs of it somehow, someway.

Just an after thought....but you were already seeing the child on a regular basis and from the description it was over nights. Why didn't you arrange the paternity testing and go when you had the baby? It would have gotten two samples out of the way and then after she ignored or refused the testing, you could have gotten a court to order her tests.

 

[GrowUp!]

you're not quite the independent thinker I would think you to be. Apparently you are dictated by men and the laws they create. If you've been through this situation, then you obviously know that "status quo" plays into legal matter.

Oh shut up and stop acting like a full-time moron. You've been given proper legal advice...so what in the hell is your problem?

Oh yeah...your problem is you came here expecting to hear what you wanted and you're not hearing it. Wahhh freaking crybaby.

You're statement is ignorant to believe that the mother is somehow the higher authority in the role of parenthood.

No moron. But until you are determined the father of the child, she is the only one who has rights. PERIOD! That is how the law works. If you have a problem, the find an attorney who will take it to court for you. Good luck on that one.

For the most part, I've taken care of my son MORE than bm has. I pay for his diapers, cloths, and the food he eats... you should know this already since you've followed my past threads.

Then you know what you do? Well first, you pull the stick outta your arse...then you keep a detailed log of ALL OF THIS and when it goes to court, you use it to your advantage and against mom. Not one person is criticizing you for this at all.

common sense would lead you to believe that the parent that spends more money and spends more time with the child should have priority.

And that has nothing to do with LAW!!!! Which is what this site is -- legal advice -- which you've received quite a bit.

Wouldnt you say that's common sense, or do you like believing in the beauracracy that has failed america?

Oh shut up, whiner. If you're that unhappy, then move to freakin' Canada.

Common sense isnt all that common

OK poster child.

What dont you understand about my case? I've already filed? You've came here to shamelessly bash. Did your ex hubby hurt you that bad? why take it on me? take it up on him

Yeah, you filed. Then you wait. That is how it works. That how it's worked for everyone. You're not the exception. She is playing games and avoiding service. All of that will not work in her favor. Yeah it's frustrating as hell. But you have to sit and wait. Unfortunately at this point, you have no rights. That does NOT mean what you've done already will not matter.

 

[GrowUp!]

Other than cheating the system, how is the physical and mental health of the child while being in her custody? If your lawyer is back on Tuesday, I would suggest waiting for him before filing a temporary emergency order.

Ummm "SeekChrist", how about "SeekBrain" first. Just because you posted a question doesn't give you the right to give advice. Especially since this is WRONG.

 

[Ohiogal]

I don't know how you are doing the paternity testing, but guarantee if you show up as pop you will be responsible for the costs of it somehow, someway.

Just an after thought....but you were already seeing the child on a regular basis and from the description it was over nights. Why didn't you arrange the paternity testing and go when you had the baby? It would have gotten two samples out of the way and then after she ignored or refused the testing, you could have gotten a court to order her tests.

Because he had NO LEGAL RIGHT to get any medical test performed on the child. It would have been illegal. Not to mention the court is extremely picky about what test results they accept as evidence - the test has to be done according to the court's specifications.