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MissLeapy

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? VA

I had a very long thread going about all the complications that was foreseen in my soon to be custody battle with my ex and iI appreciate all the wonderful help I received (no matter how harsh). Now that I've had a chance to take in all the information, and relax for a day to go back and think about it all I was wondering something...

It's possible that I could be jumping to an extreme conclusion about how all of this turns out- because I expect the worst in any situation involving myself- yet still try to have an optimistic outlook on everyone else. So no I dont want to think my ex will stoop to some of the extremes I've thought of over the past week, but they are still there.

I want to be able to handle this civilly without missing any steps when it does come to court. I've been given alot of advice on sending a certified letter about the times that my ex can pick up our son as well as informing him of our going back to my parents(all over 30 days before it happens) and was thinking that why not send with that an entire letter about all of my concerns and and things about what he has addressed to being a problem or just generally why he thinks he'd be better suited.

Is this smart?

I dont plan on being rude or anything. I'm putting in months and years that things have happened to be accurate as possible (basically creating a paper trail of the only things I have... and showing them to him in a different way). I'm trying hard to still be reasonable and get him to see what he's asking of me and what his past relationship has been with his son. I'm hoping it will lead to a reasonable discussion about what to do.

I don't want to go to court and have to tell the judge that I refused meeting with him or that every one turned into an argument to the point where I gave up on trying to work it out. I want to have the proof that i am still trying to do it and be reasonable without him being able to jump in and interrupt the things I want to discuss with him, without yelling or anything.

I plan on typing it up and signing it after I print him and myself a copy - typing because it will be very long and he has complained about not being able to read my writing, so I'm not giving him an excuse. And then getting his certified snail mail.

I will be putting in an extra sheet with only the times he can pick him up that wont complicate his or my schedule (since he works from 2pm-midnight, it doesn't give him alot of time that our son is awake being that he's only 2) because I do want him to be able to see him. as well as restating the going back to my parents.


So in my eyes it seems like a win-win. I look like I'm trying to work it all out before court, and still covering my a$$ as far as the legal stuff I need to send certified as well. I just want to get some other information- would there be anything else I should put in this letter that NEEDS to be something the judge should see/know about/that I should have in it?
 


I would only send 30 day notice of intent to move in letter by itself

Then in another letter with a months worth of dates available for him to have his son, make sure there are at least a half a dozen or more dates available as you know his work schedule so work with it!
 

MissLeapy

Junior Member
So send those two letters separate from anything else I'm sending? So in all three certified letters?

1. Trying to work everything out, detailed concerns and such. To show that I am willing to work things out before court, and that we atleast tried.

2. A letter stating which dates he is welcome to get son. (Making sure its a months worth)

3. A letter of intent to move. No more than 30 days. This one has to be separate- or could I combine the last two atleast since I'm supposed to be leaving around Jan 12th and Dec the 12th is just next weekend.

Something like that?

ALSO!

Could I send them first class/priority mail- or does it have to be certified? Is it a big difference- and is it a gap in price range?
 
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TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
When I'm sending out the Certified's - I also send out one by snail mail. It really becomes immaterial whether he signs for it or not, because I can show proof of the mail being received or refused. The chances that the snail mail one will arrive - I give it 99% if you have a good address.
 

MissLeapy

Junior Member
When I'm sending out the Certified's - I also send out one by snail mail. It really becomes immaterial whether he signs for it or not, because I can show proof of the mail being received or refused. The chances that the snail mail one will arrive - I give it 99% if you have a good address.
Oh yes I have a good address. He lives right down the street, lives with his parents and brother and his parents both know that I will be sending- so they will be more than happy to have an eye out for the letters and let me know the day he gets them.
 

MissLeapy

Junior Member
new question

What needs to be in a letter of intent to move? I'm sitting down writing the letters i need to send so I can print them out and get them sent off 2morrow, but I dont know what has to be in that sort of letter.
 

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